Daily addiction check in #1

Hi,

I never fit here until recently when I've started shopping as a coping mechanism. It's only been about 4 months and not sure if I'm technically an addict but I'm trying to nip these addictive behaviors in the bud.

Spent about $5 yesterday on travel size shower gels, not that I need any more shower gels or am traveling anywhere.

I'm starting to feel the need to spend about $5 on myself everyday, not that its the worst for someone who can afford it but as someone mostly living off social security I need to cut back. For 30 days that's $150 and that's pushing it.

Haven't bought anything today, trying to keep it that way.

Today is 30 days sober. At an AA meeting right now. Gonna get my chip!

Congratulations childofchaos831! Well done!

Yay!!!!!

Huge Congratulations Childofchaos. One month is awesome. Now keep it up, one day at a time.

splitimage

88Butterfly88,

Shopping can definitely be an addiction. It is for me and it's a huge one for me, that's gotten me, into trouble many times, over the years.

If you're spending money you can't afford, even if it's not very much, then it's a problem.

The trick, like with any another addiction, is to take it one day at a time, and commit to not doing any unnecessary shopping just for today.

splitimage

Congrats on 30 days!

Thanks for the info.

Ended up spending about $8 yesterday. Can't afford to do that everyday. Fighting urges to buy more stuff now.

Major cravings today... just everyday stresses building up plus physical pain plus mood issues (actually feeling better, which sometimes triggers cravings for me...) plus right around 30 days (anniversaries always knock things up a notch)... I really want to drink/use... and part of me doesn't care what other people would think, which is scary...

Hang in there. I'm sorry you're having cravings, but that's normal. But know that you can get through them. I relate to the milestones being hard, I typically relapse around 6 months, and have 6 1/2 months now, and noticed my cravings are worse. But I'm not giving in.

You can do this.

splitimage

Here to cheer you on to avoid drinking/using child.

Stress bid on some Ebay auctions last night but most of them went higher than my maximum bid so I didn't end up winning them except for 1, which is $0.51, which I can afford. I just fear in the future if I'm not outbid and win too many or if I start entering higher maximum bids. The weird thing is I really don't even want this item anymore, I just felt the need to buy something.

Two drinks with dinner. Day started okay. Then mom became mom. Pretty much she made me cry in the car, while she was driving me back to my car. Which was parked by the nail salon. Which is right next to a liquor store. I didn't really even think about it... I feel like crap now, I don't even know if it's worth trying anymore. At least until I can get away from her for good.

It is worth trying. You are worth it.

Do you know of a different nail salon that you like or could use?

I could go to any other nail salon... I don't have a preference honestly for any particular girl there. That is the one that my mother likes and always goes to, so I usually have to go with her, because she has difficulty getting into the pedicure chair and "doesn't want to inconvenience the little Asian girl"... (that is in quotes because those are her exact words every time she goes.) Normally it's not an issue, I've been with her so many times and have never gone into that store... weird alcoholic thinking of its the store closest to me so I don't want them to think I am an alcoholic... makes total sense, right? Today was just the perfect storm I think... well, I stayed up long enough after drinking to take my night meds and am now gonna try to sleep... here's to a new day... I don't have much hope tho, seeing as the mother is already griping about what I need to do tomorrow and the next day and over the weekend... all appearances, for family coming for the holidays, which will probably only make matters worse.

Day 201 sober for me today. Feels good to have hit the 200's.

that's great! congrats

I feel very secure in my sobriety right now. But I haven't been praying as often as I need to. I'm in touch with my sponsor and hitting the meetings, but to me the prayer has been key.

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Congratulations splitimage!

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Nearing the end of day one... feel pretty crappy emotionally...

Hang in there childofchaos831!

sorry childofchaos (like the name, sorry if its true).

Feel better.
I'm starting to feel better..the further i am from my addiction the better.

split...congratulations on over 1/2 a year sober!

88Butterfly...do you have bipolar? Just asking because I do so i blame my shopping impulsiveness on that.

I'm starting to wonder if I may have messed up my stomach this time... I took my meds last night, and had some pretty bad pain, in the area where my ulcer was... halfway through day two... went to a meeting this morning and got a desire chip... really did not want to get up and get it, but I did.