[Bobbyj]

I've been clean from opiates for 3 weeks, yesterday i screwed up and got high, i'm really trying to keep this from turning into a full-blown relapse. So far i am good, but i know i lose control of myself real fast. Wondering if you guys had any advice on steps to take to keep from going downhill after one use.

Talk to those that you trust. Do you have a friend you can talk to irl?

[cryingontheinside]

Its very difficult after a relapse. I rapsed just over a month ago and am clean again off hard drugs. But I had to avoid people who use and any temptations . because I relapsed with my neighbour , I stayed out of my flat for two weeks then after that had to avoid him and ignore him completely . the cravings were intense for the first few weeks but they are calming down now finally .

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[Bobbyj]

I have friends, but talking to them doesn't really help. They're more or less as dumb as me lol. I do avoid people that use and have changed my lifestyle drastically, but i'm just surrounded by my DOC it seems impossible to completely stay away, it pops up at some point always... I need to be able to say "no" at least once and awhile if i'm going to be successful where i live.

Thanks for the replies!

[mdogboy1]

When you have a slip up remember it's just that. A slip. It doesn't mean you're going to relapse. Stay strong and keep trying to keep clean.

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[Bobbyj]

Had the opportunity today for more, i said no, but i can't seem to get if off my mind. I'm all foggy now, went to lift weights and go for a run instead, but still can't think straight. Luckily it's a nice day, if it wasn't i'd most likely be high right now.

[cryingontheinside]

Originally Posted by Bobbyj

Had the opportunity today for more, i said no, but i can't seem to get if off my mind. I'm all foggy now, went to lift weights and go for a run instead, but still can't think straight. Luckily it's a nice day, if it wasn't i'd most likely be high right now.

I.was offered free drugs a couple of weeks ago. I said no too but it planted a seed in my head. I had constant cravings and it ruined my day but I'm still proud I said no. You should be proud too. How long were you using before you got clean?

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[Bobbyj]

It's hard to say i was very off and on. I'd binge hard for a few weeks and then stop for a week or so. Kind of to keep withdrawals on the "mild" side. I overdosed a couple of times from this. My longest clean time in the last 6ish years was last year for 6 months. Problem with me and drugs is they make me crazy, suicidal, aggressive, unstable, depressed, just a big ball of insanity that creeps up on me even after 1 use. I'm ashamed how i've acted with friends and other people while on drugs, i really need to be 100% sober, even though i still like to drink on the occasion. People never know what to expect from me and i know i'm better than that. It has ruined so many things for me. Luckily exercise helps, i'm better when it's nice out, but we rarely have sun here so it's difficult so stay consistent. Then i get depressed that i screw up all my progress. Sometimes i consider moving somewhere else, maybe better weather would help me.

[ComfortablyNumb5]

Originally Posted by Bobbyj

It's hard to say i was very off and on. I'd binge hard for a few weeks and then stop for a week or so. Kind of to keep withdrawals on the "mild" side. I overdosed a couple of times from this. My longest clean time in the last 6ish years was last year for 6 months. Problem with me and drugs is they make me crazy, suicidal, aggressive, unstable, depressed, just a big ball of insanity that creeps up on me even after 1 use. I'm ashamed how i've acted with friends and other people while on drugs, i really need to be 100% sober, even though i still like to drink on the occasion. People never know what to expect from me and i know i'm better than that. It has ruined so many things for me. Luckily exercise helps, i'm better when it's nice out, but we rarely have sun here so it's difficult so stay consistent. Then i get depressed that i screw up all my progress. Sometimes i consider moving somewhere else, maybe better weather would help me.

The fact that you recognize you're slipping is a huge step! I know we obsess and think about it day in and out but look at each day as a war that's been won. First off, who is your source to get opiates from? Lose all contact with that person, doctor, whoever. And I find that tattling on myself helps. I fessed up to my pdoc that I'm not doing so well with my stimulants and it was a simple fix, she just never wrote the script again. If you're getting them from a person then delete their number right away. Change your number if you have to. Block their calls and texts. Do whatever you can to build a road block there and most importantly, be honest with yourself and professionals. I can relate on how these opiates make you crazy. I often still chase the need to be hypomanic so I abuse. Yet once I come down im feeling depressed and just plain ****** about myself. Stop the cycle wherever you can.

Hang in there! ((Hugs))

[Misssy2]

Originally Posted by Bobbyj

It's hard to say i was very off and on. I'd binge hard for a few weeks and then stop for a week or so. Kind of to keep withdrawals on the "mild" side. I overdosed a couple of times from this. My longest clean time in the last 6ish years was last year for 6 months. Problem with me and drugs is they make me crazy, suicidal, aggressive, unstable, depressed, just a big ball of insanity that creeps up on me even after 1 use. I'm ashamed how i've acted with friends and other people while on drugs, i really need to be 100% sober, even though i still like to drink on the occasion. People never know what to expect from me and i know i'm better than that. It has ruined so many things for me. Luckily exercise helps, i'm better when it's nice out, but we rarely have sun here so it's difficult so stay consistent. Then i get depressed that i screw up all my progress. Sometimes i consider moving somewhere else, maybe better weather would help me.

Moving somewhere else will not help you....save your money. I know many have thought moving was the solution and what I have heard them repeat..time and time again in meetings...is wherever they GO....the same person is there "THEM".

We somehow have learned to cope with all our feelings..even happiness by escaping with drugs or alcohol. After a period of time away from it....the cravings get less. I had 8 years at one time and one day I thought I could just have some beer....That was 2 years ago...and I still struggle.

Yesterday must have been national slip up day because I slipped too...after 75 days of not drinking. I was so sick this morning.....but I didn't drink. I was puking yesterday....and just wanted the day to end. I knew today I would want to drink to take away the "pain" of the relapse but I did not.

Do you see a therapist? What I did that has helped me a great deal...was ask the therapist to randomly test me for alcohol. I took a big chance drinking yesterday and the day before (thinking they already called me this week). Alcohol can show for 4 days on their tests....so if they call me in on Monday....I have 24 hours to show up....If I go on Tuesday...this last slip should not show.

I had beer in the house this a.m. and knew if I drank it....that I would end up with a positive test for alcohol and that would not be good. As I have applied for disability and I am trying to document that I AM NOT DRINKING.

I heard drugs are even harder to quit...because they don't give you a hangover...so therefore less consequences the next day.

Hold on to the fact that you have done this before and succeeded for 6 months...you can do it again. Of course because you re-introduced it into your body...your thoughts for a little while will evolve around drugs. But, it will get easier if you just don't pick up.

[ComfortablyNumb5]

Ahh yes yesterday was national slip up day. I bought stimulants and stayed up till 6am. I feel like a failure but I'm taking it one day at a time. Slipping up two times a month is way better than where I was two months ago. I also quit booze a year ago with detox in a hospital and I've slipped twice in the past year. One time was last week and I spent the whole next day puking. That's what I get I guess.

We all just have to take it day by day. Baby steps will get you a lot further.

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[Misssy2]

Originally Posted by RxQueen875

Ahh yes yesterday was national slip up day. I bought stimulants and stayed up till 6am. I feel like a failure but I'm taking it one day at a time. Slipping up two times a month is way better than where I was two months ago. I also quit booze a year ago with detox in a hospital and I've slipped twice in the past year. One time was last week and I spent the whole next day puking. That's what I get I guess.

We all just have to take it day by day. Baby steps will get you a lot further.

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Thank you for posting your troubles....it makes me not feel alone...yea..national slip day. Lets get back up!

[Bobbyj]

I mention moving, not to escape my connections for drugs or try to run from my problem, but to be in a happier mind state. I am noticeably different year after year during the sunny and warm months. I even find myself turning down drugs, when it's nice out to go run and lift weights. As soon as the weather sucks i get very angry and don't even want to move from the house. Nicer weather would be a game changer for me, although i doubt i'd leave everyone i know up here. It's more of a fun thought than anything else.

As for drug testing, idk if that'd help. I'd simply not care if i failed.

Anyway today was another slip-up day i'm going to change my number or something tomorrow. If i can at least get a few weeks clean again i think i'll have my mind a little straightened out, but for now the most important thing is to avoid drugs at all cost.

Best of luck to all of you, thanks for replying. I hope you're all doing better today. Thanks