Daily Check In #3

Very nice!

Haven't taken a sip of alcohol in over 2 weeks. I don't like alcohol anymore..

Way to go Desoxyn, that's great.

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Going to a gig tonight in London, will be my first sober gig experience which will be weird. Today is day 17

How did it go whisperingskye?

Well I drank yesterday. Didn't get drunk, or have anything bad happen, I just felt like a few. I think mentally I'm still playing around with the idea of harm reduction, except I know that doesn't really work long term for me.

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same here split....
((((HUGS))))
bizi

Thanks Bizi,

Had a good meeting with my addictions Dr. on Fri. (before going to the bar). She offered to let me join her aftercare group, but you have to be abstinent for it. It conflicts with a CBT group I want to do, but maybe in Jan. She also told me about a stress management group that's on Fri's, that I'm going to try to get into.

It's really hot here today, so the temptation to go to a bar is really strong. But I won't.

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It was good thank you, was easier than I thought also meant I could watch more of the bands without needing to go the bathroom which is always good.

Sorry you ended up drinking. I used to think I’d be able to drink at more acceptable amounts, but I suck at limiting myself so all the while I don’t pick a drink up I should be ok. The minute I do I know I’ll go all out so yeah, trying to stick to sobriety. I hate that I might not ever be able to drink again but I guess it’s for the best.

Glad it was easier than you expected and that you got to enjoy more bands. That's always a good thing.

Yeah, the thought of not drinking again kind of freaks me out, I just have to remember that even though it may take a while, going back to drinking always ends badly for me.

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I feel like I haven't had an urge in quite a while, but still have longings. That's what I call still having those movies in my head of watching the sun go down over the ocean in a tropical location sipping on a mai tai. The "some day when I am retired" movies. I am only about 5 years from retirement. I know I would turn into a washed out old drunk if I started drinking again when I am retired; it's a very bad idea. But i still have those movies in my head.

I hear you UpDownAround, about fantasizing about drinking at some point in the future. Unfortunately I've let myself drink enough now, that I'm back to pretty regular drinking. It's never gotten out of control - but I'm spending money i don't have on it, and I know I'd be better off not drinking. I'm just having trouble getting up the desire to be abstinent again, because I know it will be hard, and because I still want to drink.

Maybe I just need to tell myself to suck it up and stop, even though I don't want to.

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Disability attorney day for my Husband. His court date is Sept. 17 so this was a prep. His attorney seemed very gentle and soft spoken and a bit spacey...like it was the first time she had ever seen his file. I hope she's assertive in the court room. My disability atty. was a Tiger with a capitol T and I won.

I was prescribed Vyvanse 2-3 weeks ago. I picked it up at the pharmacy, took 7 pills out of the bottle and gave the other 23 to my mom so she can dispense 7 pills a week.

I took one, felt anxiety then tried a second day so I took another one the next day and decided that it's not good for me. I had 5 left for like 2 weeks in my bed side table.

Today I gave my mom 5 pills and told her to bring the 28 pills back to the pharmacy.

Proud of myself .. being a severe stimulant addict and all.. trying a total of 19 or so different stimulants including research chemicals, meth, coke, crack, bath salts etc..

I love this coffee that I'm drinking though! =P

Good for you Desoxyn for recognizing that the med was bad for you. Given your history, I'm kind of surprised they even prescribed it.


I'm struggling with really wanting to drink, but fortunately don't have the money for it. I'm really going to try to stay sober. Just take it a day at a time I guess.

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here and alcohol free 2nd to being on antibiotics. for 10 days.
bizi

454 days.

Had back surgery a week ago, and having to take pain meds. Benzos and narcotics are my things; I like pills the most. I thought this was going to be really hard to handle, but so far, it's going okay. But also, so far, I've been in a lot of pain so I've been having to take them as often as allowed.

I put an alarm on my phone and I don't take them until the alarm goes off. My mom was going to hold on to them and give me a day at a time, but once I was home, I was uncomfortable with that and didn't want to inconvenience anyone by having them come over often to give me pills. So I've had them in my possession. But it has gone well, so far.

Childofchaos,

I'm sorry you're in pain, but good for you for managing your pills responsibly. Hope you feel better soon.

Day 3 for me today and feeling better. Going to a double recovery meeting this morning, and then an appointment with my T, followed by an appointment with my pdoc. It'll be a long day.


Hope you all have a good and sober Thurs.

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4 months without alcohol or drugs except for a week long overtaking of Adderall in July. Happy to say I did not get the script for Adderall refilled.

Way to go zijax. That's awesome.

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Good job childofchaos831! 😀

Good morning everyone,

On to day 4. I'm very proud of myself for not drinking yesterday. I got money that wasn't in the budget which was a huge trigger, but I told myself if I didn't drink I could treat myself to chicken fried rice for dinner, and I stayed sober.

Had a good meeting with my pdoc yesterday. He was surprisingly ok, when I told him, I'd been taking more of one of my meds than was prescribed. He said it was safe, and he'd rather me do that than drink or misuse other of my meds.

Today I'm going out to run errands - will be moderately tempted to drink, but should be ok.

Hope you all have a good and sober Fri.
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I still want to always drink even though I am sober these days I don’t think a day goes by that i don’t think of drinking. There is lots of stress in my life right now and I used to return to the bottle.

So tired but have a cold and watching for a fever. In and out of psychosis thanks to this cold. They changed the layout on I Am Sober app...it’s confusing now and looks ugly. I have broken the 4K$+ saved apparently since I stopped drinking. 1153days sober courtesy of the app.

I sprained my ankle when I stepped off curb into a pothole the next day went to take a pic and they were filling the hole. . Bloody city why wasn’t it marked and why was it in the middle of a crosswalk?

I am sorry you hurt your self.
I hate accidents.
bizi

Day 6 here and feeling better about sobriety. I'm going to keep going to the double Recovery meetings as I like them.

And fortunately I don't have the money to drink.

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Discipline is our friend. I am not ready to take that step yet. I had lunch with people that were putting away a few beers down at the beach, but I had asked a friend, who was one of the people there, to be a safety person. It looked good; that is a common movie in my head - having a few beers with some good local seafood kicking back at the beach. I also had to drive 2.5 hours back home afterwards. It wasn't like a strong urge but would have been a temptation if I hadn't spilled the beans to my friend.