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  #26  
Old Dec 30, 2010, 01:53 AM
Anonymous32754
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Hey meyers curiosity question not trying to pick a fight or anything. but Why do you have to wait to share these peoples stories until they create an account. I mean isn't it rather unusual for a person with ASPD to give another person that courtesy. I mean I'm ASD and rather generous I suppose and I don't know if I would even think twice about posting someone elses story. but maybe that's just me.

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  #27  
Old Dec 30, 2010, 07:07 AM
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Originally Posted by Myers View Post
Would you really be willing to give me therapy? There aren't any therapists around here that are.
Yep! Though I can't do that over the internet, I'm happy to support you in anyway I can. You are welcome to PM.

Yeah, but usually therapists have preferred treatments for specific disorders. I can't get a therapist to save my own life, and I already know all the tricks.
I'm an eclectic therapist, that means I'll use what ever suits or works for that particular person.

Well, could you give some examples? I can't exactly hit the gym whenever I get in a mood, and my bum leg prevents me from doing a lot of exercises as it is...

Coping strategies -

Physical exercise has been shown to be very beneficial for those with personality disorders as it is not about tucking the anger away but letting it out safely. I'm sorry about you leg, maybe you could get a wii or similar so you can exercise sitting down.

Writing - writing might be a good thing for you as you are highly intelligent. Write down your feelings, thoughts as they come, no holding back.

Relaxation - Sounds strange but relaxation is very helpful but is a skill to be learnt. You can buy a CD to practice tensing and releasing all your muscles in the body.

Breathing - Put hand on stomach and breathe in 1-2, out 1-2 for ten minutes. The breathing needs to come from the stomach, not the chest.

Distractions - Card games, word puzzles, non triggering music.

Psychopaths don't see therapists as people, just pawns. How can they truly trust them?
Trust won't come straight away and a good therapist won't care what you call him/her.

Michah, has it right when she says it is a part of her, the angry wolf/child. Not to be stuffed away, but accepted.
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Thanks for this!
Michah
  #28  
Old Dec 30, 2010, 02:44 PM
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AlphaMikeFoxtrot AlphaMikeFoxtrot is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by pegasus View Post
Coping strategies -

Physical exercise has been shown to be very beneficial for those with personality disorders as it is not about tucking the anger away but letting it out safely. I'm sorry about you leg, maybe you could get a wii or similar so you can exercise sitting down.

Writing - writing might be a good thing for you as you are highly intelligent. Write down your feelings, thoughts as they come, no holding back.

Relaxation - Sounds strange but relaxation is very helpful but is a skill to be learnt. You can buy a CD to practice tensing and releasing all your muscles in the body.

Breathing - Put hand on stomach and breathe in 1-2, out 1-2 for ten minutes. The breathing needs to come from the stomach, not the chest.

Distractions - Card games, word puzzles, non triggering music.
So what happens when you've been doing all of these and more for 25+ years and they are beginning to no longer work?
  #29  
Old Dec 30, 2010, 03:01 PM
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So what happens when you've been doing all of these and more for 25+ years and they are beginning to no longer work?
Welcome to Psych Central AlphaMikeFoxtrot!

Well, joining PC was a good move, there's nothing like sharing with others that understand where you are coming from.

Have you had therapy and did you find that useful? You said you have been coping with this for 25+ years, what other coping strategies do you use that you find helpful?

It might just mean changing things around a bit or going back to therapy.
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  #30  
Old Dec 30, 2010, 04:57 PM
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Originally Posted by katlover251 View Post
Hey meyers curiosity question not trying to pick a fight or anything. but Why do you have to wait to share these peoples stories until they create an account. I mean isn't it rather unusual for a person with ASPD to give another person that courtesy. I mean I'm ASD and rather generous I suppose and I don't know if I would even think twice about posting someone elses story. but maybe that's just me.
If it came directly from them, it'd be a more accurate portrayal of the account. And it would be more interesting if they could give you an idea of their personalities and their thoughts on the incident. Also, it'd be nice if some of my friends made it onto the site.

However, since most of them are ex-cons and can't hold down a job to save their own lives, none of them have computers or internet service ... Actually, only one of them even has a place to live... So, I'm probably going to have to wait until they come over to my place or figure out what a library is...
  #31  
Old Dec 30, 2010, 05:17 PM
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Originally Posted by pegasus
Yep! Though I can't do that over the internet, I'm happy to support you in anyway I can. You are welcome to PM.
I meant actual therapy.

Quote:
Originally Posted by pegasus
Coping strategies -

Physical exercise has been shown to be very beneficial for those with personality disorders as it is not about tucking the anger away but letting it out safely. I'm sorry about you leg, maybe you could get a wii or similar so you can exercise sitting down.

Writing - writing might be a good thing for you as you are highly intelligent. Write down your feelings, thoughts as they come, no holding back.

Relaxation - Sounds strange but relaxation is very helpful but is a skill to be learnt. You can buy a CD to practice tensing and releasing all your muscles in the body.

Breathing - Put hand on stomach and breathe in 1-2, out 1-2 for ten minutes. The breathing needs to come from the stomach, not the chest.

Distractions - Card games, word puzzles, non triggering music.
I'm going to have to agree with AlphaMike. I've been using these coping techniques for years. Internet forums are my current coping mechanism/outlet. And, like all others, they're quickly becoming ineffective. And that's only with the less extreme patterns of behavior; i.e., the manipulation and aggression. The occasional outbursts I have, while rare, happen very quickly and intensely. Coping mechanisms don't even cross my mind when I'm in such a state.

Quote:
Trust won't come straight away and a good therapist won't care what you call him/her.
Then what do you make of the poor doctor I mentioned early who was psychologically tormented into deep depression by one of his patients?


Quote:
Michah, has it right when she says it is a part of her, the angry wolf/child. Not to be stuffed away, but accepted.
I do accept my evil side. It's the only side I have. Antisocials, psychopaths, and therapyAntisocials, psychopaths, and therapy
  #32  
Old Dec 30, 2010, 05:33 PM
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pegasus pegasus is offline
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Originally Posted by Myers View Post

I meant actual therapy.

Sorry, I have already said in this thread that I feel it would be unethical for me to do therapy over the internet. I can't see your body language, don't know your full history, can't gage your emotions too well etc. though there are therapists that do online therapy. I am happy to help in any other way I can though. If you feel you need to let off steam, just talk or whatever I'm usually here at some point during the day.

I'm going to have to agree with AlphaMike. I've been using these coping techniques for years. Internet forums are my current coping mechanism/outlet. And, like all others, they're quickly becoming ineffective. And that's only with the less extreme patterns of behavior; i.e., the manipulation and aggression. The occasional outbursts I have, while rare, happen very quickly and intensely. Coping mechanisms don't even cross my mind when I'm in such a state.
Coping strats have to be practiced so that they do help in times of crisis.


Then what do you make of the poor doctor I mentioned early who was psychologically tormented into deep depression by one of his patients?

Any therapist/doctor that declines in mental health is due to their own stuff and not practicing good self-care. You really don't need to be worrying about the therapist's mental state, that's their job.

I do accept my evil side. It's the only side I have. Antisocials, psychopaths, and therapyAntisocials, psychopaths, and therapy

I can only see one of the pics, would love to see the other one!

........
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  #33  
Old Dec 30, 2010, 07:22 PM
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AlphaMikeFoxtrot AlphaMikeFoxtrot is offline
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Originally Posted by pegasus View Post
Welcome to Psych Central AlphaMikeFoxtrot!

Well, joining PC was a good move, there's nothing like sharing with others that understand where you are coming from.

Have you had therapy and did you find that useful? You said you have been coping with this for 25+ years, what other coping strategies do you use that you find helpful?

It might just mean changing things around a bit or going back to therapy.
Thanks for the welcome. I was required to go to therapy for a while after I had a little brush with the law. The therapist was a hopeless idiot. I would have walked out of there and left him thinking I had just been overstressed if he hadn't decided to interview my family. After that happened he tried one more session with me where he was reduced to repeating "You're hurting people, can't you understand that? You're hurting people." At the end of the session he told me he was referring me to a specialist, that he was faxing over my file, and that I should head over there. When I got there they told me I could either wait around for them to receive the file and I'd be committed for further psychiatric evaluation, or I could leave before they got it. I left.

My coping strategy has basically just been trying to stay busy. I find something interesting and I go with it. I've even managed to rack up some decent accomplishments along the way as a sort of by-product of that. It hasn't ever exactly been foolproof, but I have managed to keep myself out of prison. It's getting old. I've tried starting new things and that isn't doing the trick anymore, it's not even taking the edge off.
Thanks for this!
Gus1234U, pegasus
  #34  
Old Dec 31, 2010, 06:31 AM
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Originally Posted by AlphaMikeFoxtrot View Post
Thanks for the welcome. I was required to go to therapy for a while after I had a little brush with the law. The therapist was a hopeless idiot. I would have walked out of there and left him thinking I had just been overstressed if he hadn't decided to interview my family. After that happened he tried one more session with me where he was reduced to repeating "You're hurting people, can't you understand that? You're hurting people." At the end of the session he told me he was referring me to a specialist, that he was faxing over my file, and that I should head over there. When I got there they told me I could either wait around for them to receive the file and I'd be committed for further psychiatric evaluation, or I could leave before they got it. I left.

My coping strategy has basically just been trying to stay busy. I find something interesting and I go with it. I've even managed to rack up some decent accomplishments along the way as a sort of by-product of that. It hasn't ever exactly been foolproof, but I have managed to keep myself out of prison. It's getting old. I've tried starting new things and that isn't doing the trick anymore, it's not even taking the edge off.
Wow! That certainly wasn't therapy then was it and I can certainly see how that would put anyone off seeking help.

Sounds like you have done well with the way you have been coping so far. Maybe writing more here will help also.
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  #35  
Old Dec 31, 2010, 02:05 PM
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Originally Posted by pegasus
Sorry, I have already said in this thread that I feel it would be unethical for me to do therapy over the internet. I can't see your body language, don't know your full history, can't gage your emotions too well etc. though there are therapists that do online therapy. I am happy to help in any other way I can though. If you feel you need to let off steam, just talk or whatever I'm usually here at some point during the day.
I meant irl.

Quote:
Coping strats have to be practiced so that they do help in times of crisis.
I've practiced them. And how does one prevent the coping strategies from becoming gradually less effective? Every outlet I find eventually fails to do anything for me, so I either have to find a new one or succumb to my overwhelming desire to reembark on my former career.
  #36  
Old Dec 31, 2010, 02:22 PM
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I've practiced them. And how does one prevent the coping strategies from becoming gradually less effective? Every outlet I find eventually fails to do anything for me, so I either have to find a new one or succumb to my overwhelming desire to reembark on my former career.
What do you get from your former career that you don't get from doing other things?

Is it the rush? If it is then you will need to replace that with a legal rush.

Is it the release of anger? Then you will need to find other outlets to let go of that anger. I know it sounds silly but how about smacking/punching a pillow around? Throwing a wet sponge?

Have you tried mindfulness? Mindfulness

Do you have other emotions? Happy, joy, fear, sadness etc?

I'm hoping other people will jump in this thread with more ideas. Maybe you can come up with your own list of things you'd like to try but haven't yet?
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  #37  
Old Jan 01, 2011, 01:58 PM
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What do you get from your former career that you don't get from doing other things?
Cure for boredom and the ability to use my unique skills to their full potential.

Quote:
Is it the rush? If it is then you will need to replace that with a legal rush.
For example...

Quote:
Is it the release of anger? Then you will need to find other outlets to let go of that anger. I know it sounds silly but how about smacking/punching a pillow around? Throwing a wet sponge?
Done that. Those are things that gradually fail to have any effect. Eventually, like an addict needing stronger drugs, I need new and increasingly more hostile, challenging, or destructive means of releasing aggression.

Quote:
Have you tried mindfulness? Mindfulness
Yes.

Quote:
Do you have other emotions? Happy, joy, fear, sadness etc?
Yeah, but it's similar to any other psychopath... It takes awhile to explain, but I'm sure you can get a good idea from your psychopathic patients...

Quote:
I'm hoping other people will jump in this thread with more ideas. Maybe you can come up with your own list of things you'd like to try but haven't yet?
Legal things that I haven't tried and that are exciting... There isn't much I haven't tried, except activities that my physical limitations prevent me from doing. About a year ago, I found an article titled "13 hobbies that drive up insurance rates" and just went down the list...
Thanks for this!
Gus1234U
  #38  
Old Jan 01, 2011, 02:42 PM
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For the record I'm not working with 'psychopathic patients' at the moment. I work with people with a variety of disabilities and problems. Everyone is different.

Distractions are not designed to be used for ever and not to be used to continously cover up the reason why you need to distract. Ultimately you'll need to deal with the why. Why you feel you are evil, I've seen no evilness from you, only quick wit, avoidance and clever covering up. I feel you are a decent/caring man (I've seen that caring in action) who uses a label to stop people getting too close...
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  #39  
Old Jan 02, 2011, 12:52 AM
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If it came directly from them, it'd be a more accurate portrayal of the account. And it would be more interesting if they could give you an idea of their personalities and their thoughts on the incident. Also, it'd be nice if some of my friends made it onto the site.

However, since most of them are ex-cons and can't hold down a job to save their own lives, none of them have computers or internet service ... Actually, only one of them even has a place to live... So, I'm probably going to have to wait until they come over to my place or figure out what a library is...
Thanks for explaining myers. I can't wait till your friends join. Maybe you can clue them into what a library is???
  #40  
Old Jan 02, 2011, 11:27 AM
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I'm still interested in some additional coping strategies. I'd hate to throw away all of the things I've managed to do with myself because I've run out of ways to maintain control.

And Myers, that "13 hobbies that drive up insurance rates" article gave me a smile. The aviation rocks. Over the last 10 years I've worked all the way up to Airline Transport Pilot certification. No mean feat when one of the requirements is "must be of good moral character" and administration of the MMPI2. I picked up flight instructor certification too just for the heck of it. Do some aerobatics and racing in an L39 Albatros and see how that gets ya.I haven't ever considered hot air ballooning though.
Thanks for this!
Gus1234U
  #41  
Old Jan 02, 2011, 02:12 PM
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cool beans,,, Mike~! way to use the ol' grey cells~! love this forum~ Gus
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  #42  
Old Jan 02, 2011, 02:37 PM
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For the record I'm not working with 'psychopathic patients' at the moment. I work with people with a variety of disabilities and problems. Everyone is different.
But have you? Do tell. I love a good story.

Quote:
Distractions are not designed to be used for ever and not to be used to continously cover up the reason why you need to distract. Ultimately you'll need to deal with the why. Why you feel you are evil?
Personally, I think "good" and "evil" are hypocritical notions of the controlling paradigm. But, as to why those who know me best refer to me as "evil", I'd say it's just my nature.

Quote:
I've seen no evilness from you, only quick wit, avoidance and clever covering up. I feel you are a decent/caring man (I've seen that caring in action) who uses a label to stop people getting too close...
And you won't see it, unless I stop caring about my account's existence on this site... I can't express myself here or talk about my real problems.
Thanks for this!
Gus1234U
  #43  
Old Jan 02, 2011, 02:39 PM
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Do some aerobatics and racing in an L39 Albatros and see how that gets ya.I haven't ever considered hot air ballooning though.
Will do. I wouldn't recommend hot air ballooning. I tried it once and didn't find it all that exciting... I guess it's different for everyone, though.
  #44  
Old Jan 04, 2011, 06:39 AM
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Myers i'm sorry you feel you cant talk about your real problems - is there someone you can speak to about them - i hate to think of you silenced

as an aside and off topic - happy new year to everyone here
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  #45  
Old Jan 04, 2011, 03:12 PM
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is there someone you can speak to about them
Well, there's Wade, Colin, and Mat, when they're around. However, being psychopaths, they don't exactly care about other people's problems, and they're not all that good at giving advice. Their idea of problem solving usually involves a midnight visit to the problem's house and a lot of somewhat unnecessary violence...
  #46  
Old Jan 05, 2011, 06:42 AM
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ahh does that mean the problem is a person?

maybe as it seems you dont want to take the route your friends may suggest ...

maybe a non-psychopath could help?

just a thought
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Its not how many times you fall down that counts
its how many times you get back up!
Antisocials, psychopaths, and therapy
(Thanks to fenrir for my Picture )

When you have come to the edge of all light that you know and are about to drop off into the darkness of the unknown,
Faith is knowing One of two things will happen: There will be something solid to stand on or you will be taught to fly.
by Patrick Overton, author and poet
  #47  
Old Jan 05, 2011, 09:41 AM
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awwwe phoenixwhere did evree1 go?
  #48  
Old Jan 06, 2011, 09:22 AM
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they're still here wolfie - maybe thinking - maybe disatisfied with the reply - but stil here
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Its not how many times you fall down that counts
its how many times you get back up!
Antisocials, psychopaths, and therapy
(Thanks to fenrir for my Picture )

When you have come to the edge of all light that you know and are about to drop off into the darkness of the unknown,
Faith is knowing One of two things will happen: There will be something solid to stand on or you will be taught to fly.
by Patrick Overton, author and poet
  #49  
Old Jan 07, 2011, 10:53 AM
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AlphaMikeFoxtrot AlphaMikeFoxtrot is offline
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I'm not exactly sure what is even considered acceptable to say here. While it's obvious that PC is a support forum, in order for me personally to talk about the problems I'm having I would have to mention a lot of stuff that would no doubt be extremely upsetting or disturbing to most people. Additionally, even if that weren't an issue, no one is going to have any idea how to help.

Same story in the chat really. I tried explaining a little bit about the problems I've been having with my wife and everyone got less and less enthusiastic about the whole thing. Someone even threw out a nasty comment before they left, lol. Heck, after that I seem to have been included in a situation that night that resulted in a warning.... one that I was not a participant in.

And what is there to be said for professional therapy?
Thanks for this!
Gus1234U
  #50  
Old Jan 07, 2011, 11:44 AM
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aaah, how well i know what you mean, ,Mike... and it feels BAD when that happens~~ "but you do not have to feel so all alone,, everybody must get stoned,,, " hope to see you in chat again soon,, never let 'em get you down~! Gus
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Thanks for this!
AlphaMikeFoxtrot
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