[+Fight+The+Illness+]

Greetings Sweet-Hearted and Gentle-People,

I'm having quite an issue that I'm really sure all of us have battled (or continue to do so) before:

Speaking in front of people.

I was diagnosed with Social Anxiety when I was 6 years old, and I still haven't been able to handle my anxiety when speaking in front of people. It's incredibly frustrating b/c my therapist is teaching me things that I can do to help cope with the anxiety, and I really truly do try, but I end up failing very quickly.

I'm currently taking a Spanish class in college (I'm in my 2nd year) and to my absolute HORROR I quickly realized that my professor is going to make us speak in front of the class on a daily basis (I have the class 4 times a week). Basically, he'll ask us a question in Spanish and then he'll pick students out of the class to answer it in Spanish. Everyone gets called on at some point in the class. I have terrible anxiety as it is, but speaking a foreign language in front of others while battling with the paralyzing feeling of anxiety? I can barely speak every time I'm called on. I stutter, tremble, mumble, and never make eye contact. I'm sure my professor thinks I'm some kind of weirdo b/c of the way I act whenever he calls on me.

I have absolutely no idea of what I should do. I've been trying to cope with anxiety for more than half my life, and yet it still has it's paralyzing and crippling grip on me everyday.

Does anyone know what I should do?

+Fight+The+Illness+, when you get called on remember to breath. Take a deep breath to calm yourself and answer.

Good luck.

[ragamuffin68]

Don't fear failure -embrace it. How else will you overcome it.

[SkyHiigh]

When iknow ihave to speak in front of my class in hiighschool, What idont do is think about it. You know, What im gonna say, How im gonna act, all the little things to make sure idont mess up or look stupid. One thing I'v definetly learned from struggling with social anxiety is dont think about it cause it makes everything worst. Dont think about how your acting when your in front of the class, Just Do it. Iknow that these thoughts are habits and that you cant help, But you do have control over your own mind, ihave to tell myself that everyday.!! Just put all those little thoughts that make you think you act weird in a tiny dark closet in the back of your head. ((kinda like meditiating but not really))

Before the teacher calls me up, imake sure that ilet my mind wonder so that it can kinda be fresh when its time to talk. All my little voices will stay quiet cause ihavent given them any attettion. ikinda make myself forget that ihave them. Cause these thoughts are bad habits, and you can break them if you dont give them attetion. It is gonna be really hard to make your mind wonder when your under alot of pressure. Soo let your mind wonder to things that really take your interest.

If Your really dont get what im saying, or if you have a question message me so ican further explain.((:

[missbelle]

thats a tough one.......I don't kow what to say really. I totally understand.I probably would be dropping the class myself. Now there are some that say you should face your fears.New experiences will help you grow and get self esteem etc. I have no answer.

I think thought some of us are ready for some things, and some are not. Some people are not cut out for speaking in front of anyone while some totally love it. It's in their personality!

I used to beat myself up for not being ...lets say "whatever!"....Now I realize at my old age mind you that we are all different and its o.k. to be who we are. Some people are wired a little differently and that is really o.k. I think we all should try new stuff, be brave etc...not give up, but then we are who we are! I think thats the part that gets us.We THINK we should be different!!!!We THINK that we should not be afraid, scared etc..we TRY to be someone different....but we are not...and its o.k.

Have I helped you...No probably not!.....I guess I am telling you to do what's in your heart and what ever that is, its o.k.!!!!

[unaluna]

If class participation is part of your grade, do you need to get like a waiver for your social anxiety? Like meet with him in office hours if you can and do the exercises there. Or maybe if you super-prepare and just concentrate on learning the language, it will help you forget your anxiety. You should be answering everytime in your head anyway, when he is calling on other students (or writing the answer down). I love learning foreign languages, so maybe not the best person to answer. But don't forget to write write write - it is a necessary part of learning a language. And read out loud to yourself whenever possible, with your best Spanish accent, when doing homework. Have fun with it!

[imjustme757]

I have a tremendous fear of Speaking in Public so I know what you are going through. I've had it my entire life and I"m not 54yo. I can say a quick sentence or two or ask a question in a group, as long as it's a short sentence I can spit out without tripping over my tongue. But if I have to speak in front of a crowd for more then a couple of sentences, the anxiety hits me like a tidal wave. My heart beats out of my chest, I begin to sweat, my mind goes blank and I just seem to say things without any cohesiveness. At least, that's how I HEAR MYSELF. I fear that others see me the same way. I can't tell you how many tmes I've avoided doing things because of my fear of public speaking. So my advice to you is, conquer it now so it doesn't hold you back like it has me. There is a group called Toastmasters which is comprised of others like me and you who have a fear of public speaking. They meet anywheres from 1 a week to once a month and the purpose is to practice in front of them and get supportive helpful feedback from them. Now if only I would heed my own advice because I've purposely not participated in such a group because the fear is too much. But I know I should. Just yesterday, I had to speak for just a minute in front of all my peers about Hurricane Preparedness and what I was doing for my department and it was horrible. I jotted a few notes down on a piece of paper to make sure I address. We went around the room and the closer it came to me, the more my heart started to pound. By the time it came to my turn, my heart was jumping out of my chest. I managed to spit a few things out but my voice was shaky, I had to clear my throat a few times and I had no idea what I said. After my turn I wanted to crawl under my desk. Yet, as others spoke, I had no problem asking them a question. Only because I can spit out a very short sentence and seem and sound confident. In fact, I often ask a question after I settle down to prove to others that I wasn't nervous. But I look at others speak as if they were speaking to their best friend like it's no big deal and I envy them. It's embarrassing and it eats me up for days. So conquer the fear now. Get help now. Because if you don't, it will haunt you for a long time until you do conquer it. Good Luck!

[+Fight+The+Illness+]

Originally Posted by hankster

If class participation is part of your grade, do you need to get like a waiver for your social anxiety? Like meet with him in office hours if you can and do the exercises there. Or maybe if you super-prepare and just concentrate on learning the language, it will help you forget your anxiety. You should be answering everytime in your head anyway, when he is calling on other students (or writing the answer down). I love learning foreign languages, so maybe not the best person to answer. But don't forget to write write write - it is a necessary part of learning a language. And read out loud to yourself whenever possible, with your best Spanish accent, when doing homework. Have fun with it!

There are disability services where a student with a physical or psychological disability can get accommodations for class b/c of that disability, but then I feel like I'm labeled as "disabled". I'm already labeled as mentally ill, I don't know how I'll feel about being labeled as "disabled" as well.

[unaluna]

Originally Posted by +Fight+The+Illness+

There are disability services where a student with a physical or psychological disability can get accommodations for class b/c of that disability, but then I feel like I'm labeled as "disabled". I'm already labeled as mentally ill, I don't know how I'll feel about being labeled as "disabled" as well.

There have been some threads on here that have discussed going this route in college, and its possible repercussions for graduate school, have you seen those? On the other hand, I recently (past couple of years) read of a uni in Illinois, I think, that specializes in helping people getting through who are smart but anxious, or something - sorry, I am terrible at getting things out of my brain! Hasta la vista, baby, and good luck in and enjoy your studies

[+Fight+The+Illness+]

Thanks...I love the dancing pepper

[Phoboxyl]

+Fight+The+Illness+

A few ideas. In my marketing class when I was at school we had to give a presentation and EVERY single person was EXTREMELY nervous, sweating, stammering, making dodgy eye-contact, etc. No one was mean or rude to anyone else because everyone understood how anxiety provoking the situation was and that they were all in the same boat. I guarantee you that the kids in your Spanish class will feel the same way and be very supportive. You could even say if you freeze up, "I'm sorry, this makes me a little nervous" and laugh like it's a joke. People will laugh WITH YOU not AT YOU, because they totally understand. You are not expected to perform very well in this sort of situation, you are simply expected to try your best, trust me. It's not a high-stakes acting audition.

Another thing you can try is this: when you get nervous look at someone in the eyes. I know it's anxiety provoking but you will find that they will look away first, making you feel more powerful and in control. It will seem like you are very confident. Faking it is sometimes the best way to get it and people will think you did a great job. Just try it with ONE person and if you can't handle it then don't worry, but I think it will work.