[Estee1]

I can hardly bear going to work anymore. It's becoming unbearable. I don't want to go anywhere or see my friends. I just feel like life is crushing me, like it's killing me. I just want to hide away in hole somewhere.

[kimmydawn]

(((((((((((((((((estee)))))))))))))))))))))

i'm sorry for not knowing, but are you seeing a t or dr?

i'm sorry that you're feeling so badly. i've felt that way and it's more than hard.

i wish you peace.

kd

[SleepsWithButterFlies]

(((( Estee1 )))) I have somewhat been there and once became housebound...I am so sorry you feel so bad..it sucks.....I hope you keep posting

[Estee1]

Thanks so much for the hugs. I'm seeing psychiatrist. She's nice. It's so weird because I have my dream job compared to any of the jobs that I've ever had before and I thought I was so miserable because of the jobs I had. But it is not so. My brother says he'd love to be in my situation where work is concerned. He just doesn't know about what my life is really like. Life is unbearable at the moment.

[SleepsWithButterFlies]

With things getting worse have you been telling your T about that? I know kind of what you mean on how others looking at what SEEMS to be your life...and like in this case job..and thinking you have it made....you are right they dont know all ..like how your life is totally and how you FEEL
I am so sorry things are bad for you know ..HUGS

[JustBen]

Yeah, it's really hard to understand what someone's life is like from the outside. Appearances can be so misleading. I think that's one of the advantages of therapy: there's someone who can understand what your life is really like.

Hi, estee1!

I feel for you! I really do! Have had the same feelings... and I´m having them right now. I feel lost in myself! These feelings and thoughts aren´t easy to deal with!

But the things I know about you tells me that you´re a wonderful person...! It´s our OCD talking and trying so hard to make us feel lost and worthless... but don´t give up your fight. You´re gonna get better and both you and I and so many others have to learn to love ourselves. We are as valuable as eveyone else! It´s so hard to see that- I know!
You´re a good person with your heart in the right place! Take care of yourself as good as you can! Please, write again whenever you feel like...!

Hugs
Ninni

[Alliecat72]

I am going thru the exact same thing right now. I do not work b/c of all issues but I don't feel like seeing anyone and I live with my boyfriend...so it makes it kind of hard on him. I just want to sleep or be on my pc. I dread going anywhere for too long. I have been on meds for years and it just doesn't seem to keep me together as it once use to. I'm stressed about it...so yeah I definately can relate with you.

[SS8282]

I know what you mean. Even my own family asked me what I have to be so depressed about, and that I can make myself feel better.

Nope, not the way it works. I do hope that you feel a teeny bit better knowing that you can come here and talk to us and being understood.

Take care. hugs.

[Estee1]

Thanks for your thoughts. ((((((((((((hugs))))))))))))))
Estee

[Estee1]

yeah people find it hard to understand us. At least we can understand each other. (((((((((((((((hugs)))))))))))))
Estee

[SleepsWithButterFlies]

(((( estee1 )))) I know most people THINK I am fine and all but they do not have a clue..sometimes I wish for 1 day they could be in my shoes...just to KNOW what I feel and have to deal with...I hope we find a break soonish

[Estee1]

yeah. i hope so too. life is torture at the moment.

[chitown]

You will get thru this estee1. (((((esteee))))) I know it is tough and it seems as though you will never be able to cope. I was like that once and now I am getting better every day. Just take one day at a time and one step at a time.
I highly recommend keeping seeing your T and a Pdoc to keep you going. They have helped me tremendously as well as my wife and friends. Especially the people here.

[Estee1]

Thanks chitown. i appreciate your encouragement.
Things really aren't easy at the moment.

[chitown]

I feel what you are feeling everyday. I just tell myself to push thru it and I can make it!
Do some deep breathing and find something that takes your mind of any of your troubles. A good hobby or sport. If it's not obvious by my pictures, I fish and Hunt. That is how I forget about the bad parts and the anxious parts.
We are all behind you here, so it will be OK and you are not alone.

[Estee1]

Ah, not again. I've gone into the deepest pit. I just can hardly handle life anymore. It's simply too hard. I just feel so awful. All I wanna do is go to bed and stay there. It's all hurting so much. I am being offered more work and I can barely handle the work that I have now. What do I do?

My sweet friend!

I know you're going through a difficult time right now, but it'll pass. I know that it doesn't feel like that now, but it will. I have a lot of faith in you! You've helped me so much! I'm here for you, sweetie! Come to msn messenger when you feel up to it.

Love ya!
Nina