some situational i'm sure.....nothing is helping. heart racing, thoughts going from one "tragedy" to another so fast that i can't begin to process them normally.......i need some words......pat

[damajdancer]

((((((((((((((((( fayerody )))))))))))))))))))))
I am so sorry that you have to go through this.
I dont really know what to say, besides try to do something that usually helps you when you are very anxious.
And try not to think about your "tragedies". I know it will be hard, but if you think about good memories, then maybe the bad ones will fade away for awhile.
I hope I could be of help.
I also hope you get SO much better.
PM me if you want.
Take good care.
Big safe hugs,
-Megan-

[katheryn]

(((((((((((( fayerody)))))))))))))
take some time to gather yourself, take it easy on your self

[shearmaniac]

As hard as it may sound, try to do something that calms you. Heavy work like mowing the lawn or mega housework usually do it for me just something that can make you tired & let out all that anxiety. Please take care, it`s hard I know....HUGS

thanks.......we painted and i cooked..........p

[Sujin]

Hi Pat,

I didn't see your post until now, almost 10:00 at night! I hope you're feeling better, I know how horrible anxiety attacks can be.

Love,
Sujin

[(JD)]

((((fayerody)))) catastrophization.... feeds the anxiety.... sit down and meditate... do thought stopping...give your brain (and body) a rest... you have been pushing and doing more than you are able (and keep balanced) you are in for the long haul here.... slow and steady hon.

Pat... you've been through a lot lately. Try to relax... think about your breathing.... slowly with your tummy, lower your shoulders... think of a calm beautiful place. Maybe it's soothing looking at the photos you've taken... Those pics of the nature is just so wonderful!
You'll get through this!

(((((((((((((( Pat ))))))))))))))))

[Maven]

I also recommend laying down with a cool, wet cloth on your forehead and back of your neck.

I'm not trying to make this "about me," but when I hear people describing anxiety attacks, this is different than my panic attacks. Are they two different things? I've had psychs call them both, but while I have moments of severe anxiety (which I'll say could be what you all mean by anxiety attacks), when I have a panic attack, meaning literally, PANIC, I can't focus on cooking, or typing, or anything. I'm literally running, screaming, begging for help, please make it stop, oh god, oh god, help me!!!!!!! The attacks are fear itself, and I'm afraid of the attacks themselves. People can't seem to wrap their minds around that; they want to know what I'm afraid of, what I'm afraid will happen. The attack is what I'm afraid of. It's like a seizure, coming on suddenly and intensely. Quite literally, I'm afraid of fear itself. I remember a shrink who told me I can choose not to scream when I panic, but no, I can't. I try not to, because the whole display is embarrassing. People look at me like I'm crazy--and maybe I am.

I'm real sensitive when I see shows like I've seen with Maury Povich where people with phobias come on and are exposed to their fear and get all upset, and the damned audience is laughing. I saw a guy with OCD on Divorce Court, a 2-part thing, and the judge didn't get it, not understanding how you can't just stop the OCD, and the audience was laughing. I know we're bizarre, but it hurts that people are laughing while we're in such intense pain. If you make fun of a person with a limp or injury, you're insensitive and cruel. But if the person has a mental problem, well, screw'em, they're crazy.

I'm just trying to understand about anxiety vs. panic, and got into a bit of a rant there. I'm not trying to overtake the thread. You can ignore this post if you feel I've said too much away from fayerody. No offense taken, and none meant. And I don't think I'll ever really understand people's cruelty, nor stop it.

((((((Pat)))))))
Hope you're feeling better today.

[Meta]

I am glad to hear cooking and painting did it for you yesterday, pat. I like constructive solutions. For me it is too easy sometimes to either eat or sleep. I am glad these things can calm me down, but the eating has become destructive. I picture the kind of negative thinking you are describing and that I think I do too, as a gerbil running up and down each of ten mazes partially--halfway up one, then back down, then a quarter of the way up the next and so on. When I started on my ADD meds, this thinking went away, I was very confused that first day. That night when the medicine wore off, my mind started running over"tragedies." It felt so familiar and comfortable for a few minutes to be my usual obsessively unfocused self. I realized what was happening and I calmed down. I was and am still amazed. I don't know if this thinking would come back if I stopped my ADD meds but I don't plan to stop for the moment.

I am working on instituting things like meditation and prayer into my routine so I have behavioral changes to support me. I only worry now that somewhere down the road the ADD medication will quit on me, like so many antidepressants. So I am also going to church and 12 step meetings. I don't mean to bore you with all this stuff fellow posters but it really helps me to set out all this stuff and then return back and try to reminds myself and learn from it.

Meta

as soon as i went to bed last night, it started again. and, maven, i do fear the attacks.....fiercely fear them......then i had a nightmare during the night, about the ex again, and couldn't go back to sleep. heart pounding, thoughts of having to see him, thoughts racing.....no one to call......wouldn't wake anyone up.....the caregiver stuff that i struggle with......finally drifted off and wham,,,,,,,came out of the sleep with heart racing and shallow breaths.

sky and others, i know that i've been to hell and back lately. and i'm so stubborn that i want to defeat this stuff on my own. posting about it is helping because you all "get it" and your responses help me. i've found that sitting down with a dog and stroking the dog really helps. same thing with one of my cats. i used to do that in NM with JJ at night. i could put myself to sleep by petting him......(not a man.....silly......a dog )

i also must not read any more medical novels (bill) or go research any more on his disease. i have to stop that right now. i know enough about medical that i understand those lengthy and wordy articles and i don't even want to think about how this is going to play out....and play out, it will.....

if i had not started this thread...don't know what i would do. thanks tons for holding my hand this week....and it may need to be held a bit more........xoxoxo pat

I think you've been very brave and a pillar of stregnth throughout. In spite of everything you're going through, you're right there giving really good advice to people with their problems and I can tell by your posts that you've got a wise and hearty spirit.
I don't have any advice for anxiety or nightmares. I hope they subside soon and give you peace.

thanks a lot jax.........i try.......right now i'm logging off and trying the music route to relax. i'm wound up as a cat in a room ful of rocking chairs.....

[carolinacutie354]

hello anxiety is hard to deal with i know that first hand i have ocd which is a major form of anxiety. if you need any help you can feel free to contact me

thanks....i'm starting to feel as if someone put a spell on me......i'll be fine for a few moments and then that hole in my stomach develops and i start the cycle of the obsessive thinking......i've also gotten extremely obessive about the house.....and that is really weird for me. hopefully tomorrow will be a calm day.......xoxo pat

[Maven]

I think you're a very strong individual, fayerody. Anxiety is a b****. And not the good kind! :-P