[Bethsway]

I have to go to a party tomorrow...and I am dying inside already...It is going to be on a boat so I am afraid if I get an attack I won't have anyway of just escaping and going home...Please somebody give me a word of encouragement...Maybe I can play sick again and stay home...but it is for a special person who has been so kind to me over the years that if I don't go I will feel guilty for a long long time...I don't know what to do...I can't breathe!

bethsway, its ok, i understand what you are going through. try to calm down abit, breathe deep breaths slowly. relax.

i sometimes get like that before an occasion, and i know its not nice.

i suppose the only way to beat it is to confront it. confronting your fears helps to conquer it. id suggest that you go and hold your head up high and be proud of who you are, i would be if i were you.

you are a kind, caring, considerate person and this is why you worry about letting this special person down.

if you feel panicky, go to a toilet and clam down, or go outside and have some fresh air. tyr to stay calm, and try talking to people about things you enjoy, see if they enjoy the same things.

you have nothing to worry about bethsway, i think you will be the star of the party. and i mean that.

sorry, i know this isnt helping, so i will wrap it up, but all i can suggest is to go and face up to it, by giving into it and staying at home, it is harder next time you are invited to a special occasion. just think of it as being a short space in time and that it wont last forever, and think whos party it is. im sure you will be fine.

i usually find that if i dread a certain occasion and am not happy about going, i still go and end up enjoying it alot more than i thought i would. if you talk yourself into thinking it will be a rubbish party, when you get there and get stuck into talking to the other guests, you will find it is actually better than you expected.

if you do decide to go, let me know how it goes yea?

speak soon

simon

[Lily]

I hope that you will go to the party since it is for a dear friend. Remember that others there might be feeling the same anxiety and you can be of some comfort to them by your presence.

You have gotten yourself through challenging times before. Have you ever thought afterwards that it wasn't so bad after all?

If I were in your shoes I would do some visualization and imagine myself going and having a good and relaxing time.

And please, start doing some deep breathing.

[Bethsway]

Thank you simply simon and Lily for your wise words...Yes I made it to the party and it wasn't as bad as I thought! I sat between two people I care an awful lot about and when I had to go up to the buffet for food I again went up between two people that I care about...I surrounded myself with love and that is what helped me through it...I also took an anxiety pill when I first got there and any time I started to get nervous I did a couple long breathes...I got through it and I am glad I went...I did have a good time and even had some laughs....Thank you for the encouragement!!

[Perna]

I always have a better time than I think I'll have then get mad at myself for worrying about it beforehand :-) Each good time though I make a thought picture of a thing or two and then the next party, imagine who I'll talk to or sit with, remember previous parties, and think of a question or two I want to ask the people I'll see again, figure out what I'll say about myself (that often doesn't work, I always talk too much because I'm so nervous), etc.

Glad you did okay Bethsway and had a goodish time.

[Sarah116]

Just go and enjoy yourself, maybe you can put a end to this worry stuff. talk to yourself about what it is that bothers you and how that is just silly and everything will be fine because it will. Also think how special this person is to you!

oh bethsway, im so pleased you had a good time.

it usually is the case that it turns out better than you expect. we as humans convince ourselves of things sometimes and we think it will be so bad. im guilty of that too, and i know just how annoying it is.

im proud of you. you did good. you should be proud of yourself and i hope you give yourself a pat on the back.

take care.

simon

[drunksunflower]

Well done!!!!

Yay

So maybe next time it won't be so bad

[bigdog1263]

I am sooooooooooooo proud of you!!!