Please tell me I'm not crazy

I have never really been an exceptionally nervous or fearful person. I had a lot of nightmares when I was a little kid about the typical monsters but they never lasted for more than a few weeks and they never really affected my life, short of a little bit of sleep deprivation.

A few years ago a friend of mine came to my house with the movie "Dawn of the Dead" and since then, I feel like I've been slowly losing my mind. My husband and I lived in a bachelor apartment where we had hung curtains around the room to act as walls. I couldn't sleep for those last few months we lived there. I literally laid in my bed staring at the opening in the curtains waiting for something to come in.

I know it sounds so ridiculous to be afraid of zombies. I know they're not real, I know they can't hurt me, but I can't make my mind believe it. I can't be relaxed in my house or car unless the doors are locked and the ground floor windows are closed. I hate being outside at night, I am constantly looking over my shoulder and scanning my surroundings. Even during the day when I'm outside with my daughter an unexpected movement or noise sends my heart racing. I just don't know what to do anymore.

I used to be able to manage fairly well. It doesn't affect my life any more than just being afraid to be exposed outside. But since my daughter was born, it's gotten to the point where I will literally lay in bed at night, making a plan as to what I will do when zombies attack my house. It sounds so stupid and I am so ashamed of myself for this, but there is just nothing I can do to make this go away.

I am afraid to talk to my family and friends about my phobia. I know how hard it can be to accept that someone could be terrified of something so irrational. I've casually mentioned it to my husband but he always chuckles and tells me I'm nuts.

I've lived with this secret for 3 years now. I've mentioned to people that I was afraid of zombies, but until I came across a website a few days ago that described someone else's intense fear of zombies with virtually identical symptoms, did I realize that I am suffering from a phobia. I feel a litle better knowing that my mind isn't completely irrational and that I have no control over this, but I still feel so stupid all the time, especially since this phobia doesn't officially exist.

I'm hoping that talking about my fear to those who can understand and sympathize with my situation will help me to be more comfortable in my own skin. I'm not sure what my next step is going to be. I don't know if I'm prepared to go to my doctor for help.

I am going to continue to do all the research I can and read some other experiences before I do anything.

Thanks for listening.

Welcome to PC ((((((((((((((((scaredandalone))))))))))))))))))

I'm so sorry you are having to go through this fear/phobia all alone. You are not nuts.....just need a little bit of understanding and maybe some help from a therapist to move past this phobia. It's definitely a good option and they really can help.

I'm glad you are doing your research....the more informed you are, the less fear of the unknown there is. It's all good!

Keep posting here....there are a lot of wonderful, supportive folks here. I hope you find answers to your questions and are feeling better very very soon!

Good luck!
Hugssssssss
J

(((((((scaredandalone)))))))))) Is it possible to take those curtains down? Do zombies remind you of something or someone who traumatized you when you were a kid?
I hope you can conquer this fear. We'll be here to support you. Welcome to PC!!!!

hi Scaredandalone I sympathize with you and I know what it's alike and to be afraid of nothing . I know your fears are real but some people are more suseptable to anxiety which can be triggered by things like scary movies. I myself have a very wild imagination and to this day I will not swim in the ocean because of the movie "jaws" it's my fear, people laugh when I tell them but I just learned to laugh with them. I lived in the mediteranian for a year right by the ocean and not once did I go into the water......so I guess what I'm saying is just tell yourself that it's a fear in your head and that's all that it is, I know easier said then done but I do that and I still won't go in the ocean but I also lve in middle Canada now and there is no ocean for thousands of miles. All because of sharks....anyhow anxiety and fear is real it's the thoughts that are not and do alot of self therapy like self talk. Seeing a Therapist might help they can rationalize your fears and hopefully you feel better. I also will not watch scary movies because I know I have an imagination of my own so I don't need to watch those kind of movies....it's a trigger for my anxiety and fears....god bless and take care...they have a saying and it is " If you don't mind it doesn't matter" can't remember who said it but it's true

Hello I do not watch scary movies anymore. I did up until I had a relapse of panic in October. Now I will not watch ANYTHING that has the slightest chance of giving me anxiety like CSI or an action movie. I believe that MOST my anxiety came from scary movies and books, heredity, life situations and stress and chemical imbalances. My NEW husband who is from a country where he NEVER watched any bad images told me this 3 years ago when I still watched/read this things. I now believe him and even tho I am AFRAID of everything all the time, I know that I can 'help' myself by not watching anything that I feel will trigger anxiety. Loud noises and flashing lights, smells...lots of things trigger anxiety and SOME of this could be TRAUMA experienced long ago (or recent). I know how you feel, I know how most everyone feels on this site. This is just getting riduculous to live like this. I hope GOD or whomever you belive in does something about this awful world soon.
(today I am not hopeful, and am depressed, so forgive me if I sound negative)

Hello and welcome to Psych Central. I no longer watch scary movies or TV that much due to PTSD and the way it triggers the PTSD. I feel that you should go see a professional therapist that can help teach you to deal with your panic and anxiety regarding the things that scare and trigger you at this time and in the past. Watching TV at night to sleep has also been shown to increase panic and anxiety due to disrupting the REM (DEEP SLEEP?/DREAM) State of the mind. This is why I choose not to watch TV the last 2 hours at night to give my mind time to adjust before bed, and it is amazing in doing this has improved sleep and the panic and anxiety that I have at this time. I hope you see someone soon that can help you get things back into perspective so you can move forward in your life without the fear and phobias you are having at this time. take care and good day. Soidhonia