I feel so defeated right now. Last wk I was thinking about how I just don't make myself mix with people much. The voice in my head was telling me that I am missing out by not mixing that life isnt meant to lived in a vaccum. I do have a family, a loving hubby and 3 teenage kids, but still my inner voice was saying "no, no, you must have friends too, its a sign of how well in life you are doing" "your missing out, your not like everybody else if you dont have friends"

So I texted a friend last week, whom I use to work with and she would keep up the friendship much more if I allowed her too, and I said lets meet for lunch next week (that being today)

She texted me this morning saying the cafe we normally meet in ( about every 4months) is closed. Well that was it, the thought of walking into another cafe that I know is much more crowded and popular, creased me. My stomach was churning and I wanted to do was escape this date and just feel safe at home, so I text her explaining this and she was kinda of ok, but I feel so bad. I would have made myself go if I knew where we were going wsa completely "safe" ie, not crowded but now I'm thinking I'll just have to accept that its not fair on people if I can't fully commit then to just let them go.

I did tell her I was so sorry.

my friend just called me and said its ok, I thought she was angry/pissed off, I tried to be as honest as I could with her, she was fine with that. I guess before I'd cancel making up some lame excuse, but now I just say I can't because it is making me feel ill. I guess this is one way of finding out who are true friends and who are not?

[sabby]

(((((((mouse))))))))

Why not try to meet either right before or right after the lunchtime rush? That way you won't have to deal with the huge part of the crowd??

Hugsssssss
J

[untold27]

You could also meet at each other's houses or you can just go browsing places nearby to see any that you would feel safe in.

I understand about the safe thing though. I use that when describing using cash opposed to credit at restaurants. for me, cash is always safer. I just thought that was an interesting connection.

[Direction]

Last minute changes - like a change of places would certainly take me for a spin...

If you plan ahead for two possible locations would you be able to go (two in case one is crowded or makes you feel uncomfortable)?