anxiety attacks or panic?

i am posting a similar one i had in the drug forum but wanted to write out what is going on here because i am not sure what i am having is anxiety attacks or panic attacks ..
i am returning to a position i held about 5 years ago ... i left then because of an extremly hurtful event that devastated me - after leaving i fell into a major depression and was hospitalized several times - i have been through therapy and a unending list of anti depressants all which had no effect - along with anti psychotics. i had to end treatment last november suddenly due to finances .. i ended al medications about 9 months ago .. since then i have been taking vitamins ... my depression actually got better..however i have recently been having alot of anxiety and unable to concentrate well because of racing fearful thoughts that come and go throughout the day ..anyway .. i was recently within the last 2 weeks asked to return to my position ..being that i have been isolated from everyone except family members for the past 5 years and because i am feeling better depression wise i thought it would be a good thing to do .. i had my first meeting with my boss over lunch last week ... from the time i saw her i was inwardly overwhelmed with intense feelings ..and after about an hour into lunch i was completly overwhelmed inside ..could hardly concentrate on what she was saying i know i dissociated while sitting there listening .. i dont think she noticed ..which is ok with me .. after our lunch i came home ... i was so keyed up ..my insides were haywire .. my food would not digest at all - it took till the next day to feel like it finally went down. .my husband noticed all this and said Are you sure you are ready for this? all i know is that i loved what i did -- i loved my work so much (up until the time i was so hurt) and i do want it back - i do want to go and be productive again. the problem is i start at the end of the week .. i have no medicine to help me calm down .. i do have an appt with my pdoc late september and with t - but i dont know what to do until then. i dont know whether this is anxiety attack or panic .? i want the job back so much i said yes before thinking this through ... wondering if i should not go now . . my pdoc has told me before i would never be able to work again and wanted me to get disability but i want to go back so bad!

hello FREE1 and welcome to Psych Central. You can go to a general practitioner and get medication to help you calm down at work until you see a regular Psych Dr. in September, and you ay also want to have a physical to make sure everything is physically okay since going back to work is a major change after so long of not working. Take care of yourself. Soidhonia

thanks for your reply ~ scared to call regular doc but i guess i should do that ...i am really wanting to go back to work . it is a big change for me from being away so long. i will know if it is going to be too much for me soon ..i am hoping everything will go good. it is just something about my boss that triggers me so much..i want to sit and talk with her and let her know about it .. i want to know where it is coming from. .to see if there is something going on with her about me. i have never been around someone who sets me off so badly.