[shaddix]

You know that movie Amelie? Well even if you don't i can explain my emotions I think. Well It's my girlfriends favorite movie, and I was looking at it, and i saw that it was rated R for sexual content. And I became very afraid, I was scared, so i put the movie in my computer and watched through the whole thing at 32x the normal speed so i could find the part of it that was sexual... the entire time i was worrying, i haven't figured out why, i was just so afraid of her seeing something sexual, if i see it myself before she does, or if we see it together, it doesn't bother me, but there's something about me having to know about all of everything with her that deals with sex that scares me....... =(

[shaddix]

well i figured out what was wrong with that one, i won't bother explaining because it's long, but i've taken ccare of it,

but now i have this other problem, my libido, i'm 20 years old, currently i will be a virgin until i am 24 years of age.

and i hate it, my social programming and testosterone are pushing me towards sex, i don't want to, and i hate it, it's like i'm having to fight myself, i hate it, i won't take depo for it, and i won't take ssri's for it. it's just four years, what is that, that's nothing, my wants are nothing, i hate this.

[saudade]

I don't get most of what you wrote, even though it is so intriguing.

Do you hate sex or do you hate the fact that you wont be having it until you turn 24?

Why do you have to control you gf's mind when it comes to sex?

If sex is such a big deal and a source of stress for you, then at least you know what you gotta work on, if you see a therapist.

If youre not seeing one, though, I'd reccomend that you do.

:-)

pro safe sex

[cms39]

I remember someone else posting something similar. A man who was concerned about his wife seeing a doctor (gyn). It sounds like a similar worry or control type issue or obsession.

[Myzen]

Hi Shaddix,

It might help if you can take a step back from what's happening.

When we get very worried about a certain situation, it's often not the particular situation that's the problem but the worrying state of our minds. A test of this is whether we are starting to control other people with our own worries.

The good news is that you have noticed the problem and shared it. You haven't hidden it away in denial.

Talking with a counsellor will help, and sharing with us here.

Good luck, Myzen.

[sqrlb8]

Life is uncertain; eat dessert first.