[Sweet_Boredom]

I have an appointment in two days with my psychiatrist and I'm not even sure what to tell him about how I've been feeling. I was put on a tri-cyclic antidepressant to help me sleep at the beginning of my treatment and that made me manic... since then I've had a mood stabilizer and antipsychotic added, but my moods have been changing from one extreme to another so quickly and frequently that I don't even know if the medication is helping. I've never experienced this. I'm manic one minute and wanting to tell the doctor that I'm fine to feeling so depressed I don't even want to continue treatment the next minute. I'm just so mixed up. I was so used to months of debilitating depression followed by weeks of mania. I'm not used to this.

I have PTSD too, and some days the anxiety is so bad I want to (and do) just curl up in my bed and cry while other days I can go out and be around people and be perfectly okay.

How long is it going to take to just feel normal or even just ok? I've been on medication for 2 months now, I had hoped it would have made a noticeable difference by now... and I suppose it has, I just don't like the difference its made.

I guess I just needed to vent, try to organize my thoughts because right now they are fluttering in and out of my head like crazy.

[lxegirl]

i really don't know what to tell you, maybe your body just isn't handling the medication right. I mean, there are alot of medications out there, the first choice doesn't always have to work. I'd just tell my doctor exactly what you just posted, so they can try to look for a solution. Hang in there!!!

[mommasuesue]

hi sweet medications can be tricky just make sure to call your pdoc and let them know how your feeling on this new med, not all med are meant for everybody .

[la doctora]

I know how you feel Sweet. I go from depression to hypomania frequently. I never know what I am going to feel like the next minute. Sometimes I will be fine, and feel so good that I don't think I will ever feel depressed again. But then that switch flips and I am totally depressed. It is hard for me to decide what meds are helping me or even if they are helping me at all. I was on Zyprexa, but it made me much more depressed that I have ever been in my life. I am in the process of weaning off of it right now. I am now on the titration pack of the lamictal and I feel like I have seen positive results. For the past two weeks I have felt really good, confident, and energietic, and had a positive outlook on life. Then I had an argument with my husband this weekend and it threw me into a funk again. It has been a couple of days and everything is fine with hubby now. We apologized and made up. Still I am depressed and can't seem to shake it. I want to feel the way I did for the past two weeks. I feel the lamictal is helping so I want to stick with it. I know that I will still have bad days but I have to look past those and remember the good days to remind myself that the meds are helping. If I don't do that I have a tendancy to think they aren't working when in reality they really are.

I really hope that you feel much better very soon. Hang in there and give your body and chance to adjust to the meds. It may just be a matter of time. Hugs to you.

[rkba97]

I often feel like I'm not getting my point across to my doctor... but they seem to get my point anyway. They're trained to ask the right questions and interpret your answers correctly. Not saying they're always correct, but you're telling them more than you think when you go see them. Whenever she asks how I've been, I can really only tell her how I've been over the past few days, and not over the past couple months, when my moods went from one extreme to another a million times back and forth since the last time I was there. I don't know, it took a couple of years to get the meds and dosages right, but I think the Lamictal and Zoloft (100 mg each these days) are working for me.

Doesn't mean your mood swings ever go away... but the meds help to make them less extreme, and with therapy you learn how to deal with your emotions in a healthier way. It's a never ending process and it's often frustrating and some days you just want to give up. Right now I'm pretty positive about life, but that doesn't mean I'll never again spend a week in bed in the dark crying to myself... because that's what bipolar is. But hopefully one day you find what works for you so that the good times outnumber the bad... it's possible for all of us, really!

[blueoctober]

Sweet_Boredom I have found that with most meds I have been on it took a bit of time to see if it was going to work (at least 3 months). When I was first diagnosed it helped me to keep track of my mood. For me my moods can be triggered by what I eat and drink, so when I first started tracking my moods I noted what I had ate / drank. A great book on this is "The Food Mood Solution" by Jack Challem. I know it's frustrating when you are first on meds and I hope that you find the right mix soon.

[BlackPup]

Like blueoctober, changing meds always messed up my moods for a bit... You have to give your body time to adjust...
I agree with the others, communication with your doctor is really important...

[sugahorse1]

I changed meds about 2 weeks ago and am still all over the place. I think they pushed me into hypomania for 4 days or so, and now I'm back down, with depression lapping at my heals.
It's not easy, but I hope you can find some consolation in the fact that you are not dealing with these things on your own.

I see you like horses - they are the most amazing therapists - go spend some time around them. They bring your real emotions to the fore and allow you to experience and deal with the emotions.

(((HUGS))