What are these feelings/emotions?

Thanks Northern. I have a rather stressful day today, which will be a late one, helping my boyfriend with his business. I know to try avoid any stress, and if need be take a Klonopin. I am going to start my day by going to visit my horse. Then I have Sunday to look after myself.

Suga, a lot of us have a lot of trouble with stress anyway, and anxiety problems are nearly so common in bipolar disoroder that there has been talk of including patholoical anxiety as one of the inclusion criteria for the disorder. Honestly. You have had a lot of pressure on you for a while now, and the situation with your P-doc doesn't seem all that helpful. Is there any way that you can get a second opinion? I would agree that your doese seem very low... butthen I'm no med doc. take care, hon. You yelled at work? Gosh, Suga, if that were me, someone's head would be bouncing down the stairs No wonder you aren't exactly Mary Poppins in the office! HUGGGGSSS!

lonegael - I have a reputation to be avoided at the office. Becaus 9/10 times I wear my heart on my sleeve, and I'm not afraid to say it how it is. I have serious rage/anger issues and if I feel I'm being hard done by, I'll lose it.

I'm busy running out of reputable pdocs in my area. One of the reasons I left my original one was the long waiting periods. And now I'm in the same boat! Arg -I really feel I just want to go to my GP and get him to prescribe whatever him and I tihnk could work. I'm over this right now.

Woke up crying on Sunday morning - pure exhaustion, no motivation, lack of purpose... I battled to get up. I just wasn't interested in anything.

sugahorse! Sooo relating to this sentence. It's an awful way to be feeling. Can you go to your GP on the med thing? I know how badly things can go with a GP on that front, BUT, we're not talking about diagnosis, and you are knowlegable about what is available to help, so it does seem like a reasonable option in your case. Long waiting periods are so very very frustrating. Let us know what you decide and keep us posted, ok?

I really wish I had my T to consult with on the matter of who to see regarding meds. I know her and my pdoc have occassionally been in touch; I'm assuming they're working together to help me, but right now NEITHER are available.

Hope you got ahold of one of them

My sympathetic frustration is really kicking in dear. This must be really driving you nuts.!

Havent got hold of either my pdoc or mt T - my T is away as her husband has had to have an operation. And I mailed my pdoc's rooms saying I needed to get in urgently as I really was not doing fine.
I wonder if she would be held liable for not listening to my plea's for help and things were to go horribly wrong.
Anyhow, it's 1 more week to go now before I see her... And I'll refuse to leave without an anti-dep or anti-psychotic.
This morning for the first time i started to hear things. My boyfriend had left early for work, but I could have sworn I heard something in the kitchen, as well as footsteps on the wooden floors. It was scary thinking someone could have been in my apartment...

Remember, do the circuit, check the doors and the windows, and repeat to yourself that you are safe. After you do the check, you can be reasonably sure that what you are hearing is an active mind whtih no where to go with all the enregy. I hateit when my brain cells do that to me! does playing soft music help? HUGGGSSSS

suga hope you are feeling better soon. Sometimes I distract myself by TV, movies or TV...

i got ready for work asap, and am keeping myself occupied here. I do not want to have to experience those sounds again