to work or not to work ?

I've been thinking about getting a part time job for a while now. My pdoc is against it. I am on disability and have been for five years, before that I was in collage for 2 years, so I actually haven't worked in 7 years. I could use the extra cash because disability rates are fairly low. Thing is I feel so under confident that anyone would hire me, my resume is bleak at best, I am very introverted, and I am just plain lacking confidence.

I am also very worried about getting a job and then not being able to keep it. My Pdocs idea is that I am so Unstable all the time and raising three kids that I don't need a job, also I will be starting treatment for anorexia soon and I guess he thinks this is too much. My opinion tho is that I am stuck at home all day, and have become socially inept , a total recluse, I feel like I am not contributing and wasting my life away. If I did get a job it was have to be extremely low stress, very part time, probably some meaningless job. Would I then feel like I was contributing? I don't know. Can I handle a job? I don't know

Anyone been in this situation? How do you find meaning or purpose, that feeling like you are a contributing member of society, that you are important and needed? I have really been struggling with this for a long time now. When I was told to go on disability it was like someone just pulled the rug out from under my future and dreams.

Hello Anika,

I can totally relate. I am 19 and on disability, and can relate to your feelings of not contributing. However, you are raising 3 kids and working on yourself - this is contributing! My personal opinion is, if you are often unstable and going for treatment for anorexia soon, this might not be the best time to get a job. Raising 3 kids is a big enough job on its own, and instability + future treatment will just add more stress.

As far as feeling more involved in life, perhaps you could find a place to volunteer at, or even a few different volunteer opportunities? Less stress, but contributing for sure. Maybe signing up for a free class or a club that you're interested in might be a good option as well.

I'm currently finishing my final high school credits, and am looking for volunteer opportunities that I'm interested in. I also take care of my adorable puppy, Zeppelin.

You know yourself best, though. Take some time to consider the pros and cons of getting a job, and don't be afraid to pick what's best for YOU. I am not taking a job right now because it would be a bad choice for me, and I know my limits.

Best of luck to you.

Melissa's advice is spot on with what my docs have told me. My T recommended that I find volunteer work to get involved in to address my concerns about not contributing, rather just existing.

I'm looking into perhaps taking online courses if I can find an interest or career that would allow or mesh with my symptoms (can't work well with others or under others, poor short time memory, poor concentration, attention span of a two year old). I know I have to be realistic so until that miracle happens I too will have to stick to volunteer work.

I hope all goes well. Your being a mother of three and coping with BP makes you my hero. Good luck with whichever decisions yo make!

you are my hero as well, try to think about job if it will make you happy to do something for your satisfying? for money? for change to do something other than to care about children? for going to contact with people? for possibility of your future if kids will be adult? for therapy?

What about volunteering at the library putting books away... I know it doesn't sound exciting and it prob isn't, but it would be relatively quite, non stressful and around other people to either socialize or not....

My job, and previous jobs, have been the only things that have kept me out of hospital, if i didnt have a job, i'd be nothing right now.
I dont have kids or a partner so its what gets me out of bed in the morning, even when i dont want to.

They say that if you're in the position to work that it can actually help stability.

Volunteering is as helpful, too. Good luck on whatever venture you choose.