i dont know what is wrong with me?

i know i need to go to a psychologist but i have already gone to one from around 3 years and i never work he give meds and they never worked so i stopped going and stop taking the meds and to be honest i dont want to go to another pdoc that make me feel the same .

i was diagnosed with depression when i was 18 now im 21years old but after i stop taking the meds i star to feel this euphorics states where i am so happy and anything is possible and i want to be with people and im talk and laugh more than the usual i try to control myself so other people dont realize my changes but sometimes is hard then i feel horrible very depressed im so much in agony and i think about killing myself ,but the episodes are not for weeks but for days sometimes hours ,sometimes 2 days im happy then miserable others 1 hour happy then next hour depressed ,and i have this states where i feel i can cry and laugh and the same time like a couple of minutes ago i could cry and laugh run and lie down all at the same time, is so confusing ,i stop myself from doing it because i have a roommate but sometimes i feel im going to lose it ,this has being happening for around 5 months and to add a new symptom since last week i lost my temper really quick with people and things, the other day the computer was having troubles and i was so angry i started to curse and hit the desk and i feel the need to take the screen and throw it against the wall,or if someone say something i dont like im quick to let them know i dont like it my answers are becoming aggressive suddenly i become very angry and fast so fast that i takes me by surprise and then is gone and im not angry .my only diagnosis is depression but i feel out of control.can depression make you feel like this?

sorry from my bad punctuation but i have dislexia.

Hi Flying brain,
Welcome to PC. Some people with depression feel angry and irritable. But this can also be a sign of bipolar.
I think you should see a pdoc and it is really important to tell them of the times you talk and laugh lots, your mood changes and your anger problems. Maybe you have bipolar and that is why the depression meds were not working. Try to find a pdoc that you trust and that listens to you.
Therapy is also important, a good therapist can help you with ways to deal with your anger and also help you with your depression.
Good luck on your journey.

hi FB, i too would recommend your exploring another T. if you do go printing your post to take with you. it would help. i understand how u feel. i once was that way with my bipolar. i'd go to sleep one way and wake up the opposite way. therapy, a pdoc, and meds have changed my life for the better. i hope you can find peace too.