[~Christina]

Im sitting here staring at the medication bottle of Haldol wondering if I should take it or be day 6 with out it .... hmmmmmmm

I do feel more " up" maybe???? a tad Hypo.. or maybe im just happy ... How can you tell the differance?

Opinions????

[Miss Laura]

Hey morethingswrong,

I would take the Hadol!! I am the worse person to talk as I don't take my meds either but you should take it.

Even if you feel alright. Telling the difference between feeling more up, a tad Hypo or just plain old happy I can never do...... I just usually follow what my head says which sometimes is never a good idea lol!

[~Christina]

lol Laura ... Im really the same way ... Im really enjoying feeling happier and Im actually laughing at funny stuff on my facebook.. which hasnt happened in monthssssssssssssssssssssssssssssss ...

I just hate the numb feeling and I also Rapid cycle so its probably best I take it ,,but I think Ill sit here and stare a little longer hehehe ... being bipolar really sucks tho !

Thanks ,, have a great sunday

I know how you feel, I'm wondering if I should continue with this antidepressant or not. I haven't been feeling "right" since I've been taking it.

When is your next Pdoc app.? I know it feels like a tough call sometimes. Especially if an app is a ways away. Probably a good idea to continue with it, but call and talk to your dr. I think if you are feeling like something isn't right since taking it, then something probably isn't.

I can't usually tell when I am manic until I'm in too deep either. And yeah Bipolar sucks, nothing glamorous about it at all.

[roads]

Yep, I'll throw in my vote with that ... Hey, Anika, great summary, "Bipolar sucks, nothing glamorous about it at all." Amen.

Christina, Laura, we're all just lab rats, every damn day, because every day our own body chemistry may be just a tad off from yesterday's--& so will produce a different outcome with the meds.
A lab rat in a crap shot ... welcome to life in my bipolar world.

Would you believe it? I was in a pretty good mood this morning!

[dragonfly2]

Damn, Christina...I must say you got my attention with that thread title...glad you're okay.

I know what you mean though. I don't like taking the meds either some days.

[Forgive77]

Originally Posted by dragonfly2

Damn, Christina...I must say you got my attention with that thread title...glad you're okay.

I know what you mean though. I don't like taking the meds either some days.

I know right???? I was like.."I MUSt read this!"

[TOTT]

Gotta take it for now. Talk to the pdoc, say why you don't want to take it, go from there. That's my opinion. Or, if you're not, at least write down a list of the behaviors the manic you does that you don't like so you can avoid them. Maybe leave credit cards at home when going somewhere. Don't plan big trips. Make sure you get sleep. My biggest mania thing is hypersexuality, so for me, the note would be "STAY AWAY FROM BOYS" LOL

[kindachaotic]

(((Christinia))) Really sorry it has to be this way.

Either on meds & feeling better in some ways or not on meds, then good for a certain amt of time, then who knows.

Ask yourself, how has this approach worked for me in the past? Are you sleeping less & less? The usual things that happen getting manic.

Thought Tott had a great idea of writing down the you feeling good, like today vs the you feeling & acting while heading towards mania. If you think your husband is a good compass for the question ask him.

When do you see your T next, do you feel comfortable discussing the med issue with him before talking to pdoc about it? Our T's & pdoc's know all about us wanting to stop meds.

I'm not going to tell you what to do, because I don't like being told what to do. I know what the logical answer is for you, or anybody with history of rapid cycling. Also know that that doesn't make it any easier for you to decide. Again consider calling T or pdoc tomorrow.

Sending many good thoughts & prayers your way.

[~Christina]

Thanks Anika ((( hugs))) I just feel almost sorta happy right now its such a odd feeling for me .. so I dont know if Im just happy or going hypo.. Bipolar glamour LOL sounds like a good name for a perfume ,, Haaaaaaaahahahahaah

Roadrunner .. I totally agree with " Lab rats" !!! and I do think our brain chemisty changes daily thats why we seem to always need our meds " tweaked" Sorry your mood went from good to something else ,, I can so relate .

Dragonfly and Forgive .. Sorry if that made you all worry .. Im still looking at it (med bottle) and have been off and on all day LOL

Toss the only way i know that i will be in trouble is if my sleeep goes all wonky ,, Im still doing 6 hours roughly a nite ..if that number drops ill go back on the haldol altho it doesnt help me sleep ,,its the only med i take in the AM ..I dont think im showing any signs of Mania ,, I cant shop.... no money and no credit cards ( thank god) , everything else is in the ' normal' range for me .
maybe Ill wake up tomorrow and take the med ASAP .. I see my T weekly on wednesday ill discuss this with him also whether Im still off it or back on it.

My husband and I had a discussion today about me not taken it ,, mainly because he didnt know I had stopped but he mentioned last nite I seemed to be more like my old self ( ie: before bipolar dx) so I told him... he got a worried look on his face ,, but since I havent been actually close to happy in the last 2 years I dont know whether I am happy or hypo or heading to hellville ...

Thanks you guys ,, Your the best

[~Christina]

Hey Kinda (((( Hugs )))

You brought up very valid points ... my T and Pdoc are in the same office so usally i discuss stuff with my T if he feels the pdoc needs to be in on it he will emaill him right away and ill have an answer same day or at the latest the next day..

I have been rapid cycling for so long and even tho i feel kinda happy my mood has been up and down a few times each day off the haldol ... it just feels nice to feel " happy?" I absolutly wont let myself get carried away and wind up on the pysch ward again 3 trips last year were plenty for me .. I will most likely be back on the med within a few days if not tomorrow ..typically i dont feel like i have a right to be happy ( working on this with my T ) so feeling " happy ish" is so not the norm for me and for my husband to notice that i seem happier and back to joking some was wonderful to hear ,,he said he will keep an eye on me and let me know if i do anything odd ..

thanks so much for your wisdom and kind words

[kindachaotic]

Christinia, Seems like our posts crossed it cyberspace.

Don't think you needed my rambling anyway & I type SLOW!!!

Just wanted you to know I read your post & care.

[Jamielow]

I saw the thread and thought that was me last night but when I read
not what I was thinking but happy your ok bipolar told me it's
only temperely ( if that spelt right ) I hope it is god I hope it is

[~Christina]

Kinda you dont ramble !!!! and our posts can cross in cyberspace anytime

[~Christina]

thanks Jamie

Christina,

Did you come to a conclusion on the meds? Just thinking about you, I hope you are alright.

[MissMousey]

Yes, bipolar sucks! Been NOT taking my meds as prescribed either...I HEAR you loud and clear. It's a really tough decision to make when we know what lies down the path ahead of us. I am feeling somewhat hypo manic myself and it's a good feeling...makes it tougher to pop those pills into my mouth. Trouble is...I can very quickly spiral out of control and end up in a really ugly place...to take or not take the pills...now that IS THE QUESTION...isn't it? I wish I could answer for you...just be careful!

[TOTT]

Keep us posted, please.

[~Christina]

I did indeed start taking my haldol again... Only really due to the fact i wasnt able to sleep ,, and when i dont sleep i do stupid stupid things .. I have taken 2 days straight now .. but im feeling that " numb-numb" feeling again

I see my T tomorrow so i will talk to him and if need be he will email my pdoc ( they are in the same office and i usally hear back same day or at the latest the next day)

Thanks for caring