[sugahorse1]

How do you handle those things:
Feeling lonely?
Being truely alone?
Having no motivation?
Battling to find a purpose beyond surviving the day?
Feeling like you are being deserted or avoided?
Feeling overwhelmed?

And I'm sure we all have our own issues. I am so hyper-sensitive, I'm sure most of the above actually shouldn't apply to me

[hamster-bamster]

Originally Posted by sugahorse

And I'm sure we all have our own issues. I am so hyper-sensitive, I'm sure most of the above actually shouldn't apply to me

I bet you are correct!

[hamster-bamster]

Originally Posted by sugahorse

How do you handle those things:
Feeling lonely?
Being truely alone?

My cats help me. I am sure your horse helps you. When I come back home, I am not alone: three cats greet me from different directions. They need to be fed. I talk to them. No, I am not truly alone. I remember the times when I had to come home to an empty apartment. What a difference! My ex used to tell me: "Get a cat; it will be so much better with a cat" (he has one cat). He was right, but little did he know that I would end up with 3 cats! One of my own and two foster kitties.

Originally Posted by hamster-bamster

My cats help me. I am sure your horse helps you. When I come back home, I am not alone: three cats greet me from different directions. They need to be fed. I talk to them. No, I am not truly alone. I remember the times when I had to come home to an empty apartment. What a difference! My ex used to tell me: "Get a cat; it will be so much better with a cat" (he has one cat). He was right, but little did he know that I would end up with 3 cats! One of my own and two foster kitties.

same goes for my puppy.

i like to think it understands.. so i talk to it

hell i've no one else..

[Blue Poppy]

...... having two dogs that I talk to all the time
...... walking in the forest, a place of solitude, naming everything I experience with my senses, mindfulness) to get out of my head
...... sleeping (not recommended)

[Kristiemarie]

My one dog is my soul dog. He takes meds too for anxiety. Everyone hated him and wanted to get rid of him...he was the reject dog, the misunderstood dog, the dog with "issues". I feel some kinship with him and he helps me.

[eloquentdisaster]

I have a bunny and three (soon to be five) birds. I guess I'm never really alone. As for being motivated, the necessity to care for my pets helps motivate me to do other things. If I can clean three cages, I can damn well take a shower, myself! And if I can take a shower, I can get dressed, ect ect... and, again, it is kinda my pets who give me a reason to keep existing. They need me. I couldn't abandon them
Feeling deserted or avoided is not something I deal with very well.. I get very paranoid and then obsess about the situation, then usually find out I'm wrong anyway.
I'm still learning to deal with being overwhelmed... my favoured approach at the moment is pretty much just to hide away.

[hamster-bamster]

Originally Posted by Blue Poppy

...... sleeping (not recommended)

what is bad about sleeping? or do you have hypersomnia?

[sugahorse1]

Aaaaaaaa!!!! I just can't help but feel so lonely. Like no-one ever wants to do anything with me on weekends or after work. And I get myself into a pointless rat-race. I dread when I finish work and go home with nothing to do. There's only so much TV one can watch?! I am so frustrated and confused and hate this

Originally Posted by sugahorse

How do you handle those things:
Feeling lonely?
Being truely alone?
Having no motivation?
Battling to find a purpose beyond surviving the day?
Feeling like you are being deserted or avoided?
Feeling overwhelmed?

And I'm sure we all have our own issues. I am so hyper-sensitive, I'm sure most of the above actually shouldn't apply to me

All of these kinda go hand in hand for me. Sometimes I feel one or the other. Anger, depression, frustration is usually the result. Or... these are the result of my anger, frustration and depression... hmmmmm

Originally Posted by sugahorse

Aaaaaaaa!!!! I just can't help but feel so lonely. Like no-one ever wants to do anything with me on weekends or after work. And I get myself into a pointless rat-race. I dread when I finish work and go home with nothing to do. There's only so much TV one can watch?! I am so frustrated and confused and hate this

the list sounds like depression but this sounds like hypo! Do you experience mixed emotions?

[faerie_moon_x]

Originally Posted by sugahorse

How do you handle those things:

Feeling lonely? - I don't handle this very well, this can trigger me into obsessive racing thoughts

Being truely alone? - This one just sets me off into a spiral of "Figures no one ever takes care of me, no one loves me" type of mindset.

Having no motivation? - I fight it a little but in the end everything I try ends up half-done or poorly done.

Battling to find a purpose beyond surviving the day? - Thankfully I already have a purpose in my kids and husband. But, I often get very angry at myself because I didn't live up to my potential intellectually.

Feeling like you are being deserted or avoided? - This is a major, major trigger for me and can send me straight into an episode.

Feeling overwhelmed? - I tend to push through things until I completely break down or get sick (physically sick.) I pretty much always feel overwhelmed. Sometimes it triggers me, often makes me angry.

So for these particular problems I don't have the best coping skills as you can see.

[sugahorse1]

I never thought of this as mixed episode. I'm just so sensitive and fragile right now.
I'm lucky to have a really strong immune system, so even when I'm really pushing myself, I don't often get physically sick.
There are a few friends I feel are deserting me at the moment. The one has huge issues in her own life and I've done my best to support her, but right now I need someone too.
The other just hasn't replied to my messages. I'm really having to control myself to not bombard them with messages.
I'm also not truely alone - I live with my bf. But that's another story. Right now I wish I could go home, take a sleeping tablet to sleep, and wake up in the AM again

Thanks for answering this thread - my recent threads have also not received many replies, which doesn't help but make me feel like all I do is moan.

[Kristiemarie]

It's amazing to me how thereputic animals are. They are truly Gods gift to man.

Just because you don't get many replies... that doesn't mean that people are uninterested! Keep posting. I'm looking forward to them.

[cocoabeans]

How do you handle those things:
Feeling lonely?

Call or text someone.

Being truely alone?

I'm not.

Having no motivation?

If I feel demotivated, I ask myself why I feel like that and question whether or not I should even be motivated. Then I react accordingly.

Battling to find a purpose beyond surviving the day?

I don't battle it. I accept and acknowledge life is meaningless.

Feeling like you are being deserted or avoided?

I don't feel like this.

Feeling overwhelmed?

Take a break. Distraction.

Lots of what your feeling is normal. Why do you think it is bipolar causing these negative thoughts?

[sugahorse1]

I don't think I'm blaming it on BP; I understand anyone can feel like this. But I still don't like it. And I'm worried it triggers major depression again.
I do feel what I wrote in my initial post; just not in a good place right now

[Trippin2.0]

People are fickle and self centered. Fullstop. Eg.When my sister /bff was battling a major depression earlier this year, I dropped everything including Jordan to jump in a bus and go be with her and my nephew. Looked after him, cooked, cleaned, did her laundry, so that she could just focus on herself and the job she hated. I was in a bad space, even signed a contract here to not off myself, still, I took care of her and the baby.do you think she,s ever even driven the 20min to my house to support me?

[Trippin2.0]

Some people give, others take. I've made peace with the fact that I dont know m/any givers besides myself... sorry to hear you've got so little support, I know how rough it can get

[faerie_moon_x]

Originally Posted by Trippin2.0

Some people give, others take. I've made peace with the fact that I dont know m/any givers besides myself... sorry to hear you've got so little support, I know how rough it can get

This is true. Either you're a giver or a taker, and the takers don't understand the pain they cause when they refuse to give back.

[BlueInanna]

Originally Posted by sugahorse

I don't think I'm blaming it on BP; I understand anyone can feel like this. But I still don't like it. And I'm worried it triggers major depression again.
I do feel what I wrote in my initial post; just not in a good place right now

Sorry you're not in good place right now suga I know what it's like to worry about the depression coming back! It was crippling anxiety for awhile and I wasn't even in a depression. But we remember how bad one of the last ones was and never want to return there. I think I've had about 6 months now without a depression. I have down times, but the big one hasn't hit again. So with this time passing, I'm less and less worried about it. And while I'm not worrying about it, gives me space to come up with ideas about how I'll handle it if it does. Now I'm able to just have a good cry when I need, or take a day in bed with movies, but it's not lasting months. I hope you might be able to feel something like this as you get more time passing.

Also, I want to say that a lot of people read the posts but don't answer. Not everyone is comfortable writing on here. I think someday they'll pop-up and say, hi I am here I have been reading and am ready to write now.

[BlueInanna]

Suga - I just had an over 2 hour crying spell... ughh... little part of me worrying the beast of depression might return. How are you doing?

[bluemountains]

Originally Posted by sugahorse

Aaaaaaaa!!!! I just can't help but feel so lonely. Like no-one ever wants to do anything with me on weekends or after work. And I get myself into a pointless rat-race. I dread when I finish work and go home with nothing to do. There's only so much TV one can watch?! I am so frustrated and confused and hate this

Hi Sugahorse, I understand your feeling of rejection. Have you invited friends to do things with you? I occasionally feel very sorry for myself because I feel that my friends have deserted me when I am not included in activities, but on the flipside, I don't invite any of them to do things with me.
I also enjoy being by myself at places such as Starbucks or Panera Bread, places where I can take my computer if I want to surf, or just observe others. I like the idea of my family having no idea where I am.

[sugahorse1]

I need to learn to enjoy my own company too...
I do invite ppl. I sound like such a loner - but I never thought I was!

[catgina]

Originally Posted by sugahorse

Aaaaaaaa!!!! I just can't help but feel so lonely. Like no-one ever wants to do anything with me on weekends or after work. And I get myself into a pointless rat-race. I dread when I finish work and go home with nothing to do. There's only so much TV one can watch?! I am so frustrated and confused and hate this

I feel the same way I have no friends or family except my husband and he could careless just get over it already..... and my 8 yo autistic/ADHD son.....