[bluemountains]

(Mention of sui.)

For those of you who go to therapy, do you ever feel like you are paying your t to repeat what he/she said a few months ago?
My "up" conversation revolves around not quitting my meds, stopping the binge drinking, and quit playing with the benzos.
My "down" conversation (today's conversation) revolves around keeping a plan to change my thought patterns away from sui. Going back to keeping a mood chart, and promising to call if I get worse.
Around I go...it seems that the few hours/days I feel balanced is never a therapy day. I want my t to know that I do have regular thoughts. If only I could get a good night's sleep just once before I go, I could show that sometimes I have this bp thing is check!
Bluemountains

[dragonfly2]

Are you losing sleep just before your appointments? (Sorry if you've mentioned this in other posts...) It could be that your mind starts to ruminate about things the day or two before your appointment, leaving you feeling unbalanced on the day of your appointment. Just a theory.

To answer your question, yes, sometimes it feels that way. I'm hoping that with each time through an issue that I'm at least a little closer to learning how to handle it - sometimes I am, sometimes I'm not, but yes, I can relate.

[bluemountains]

Originally Posted by dragonfly2

Are you losing sleep just before your appointments? (Sorry if you've mentioned this in other posts...) It could be that your mind starts to ruminate about things the day or two before your appointment, leaving you feeling unbalanced on the day of your appointment. Just a theory.

To answer your question, yes, sometimes it feels that way. I'm hoping that with each time through an issue that I'm at least a little closer to learning how to handle it - sometimes I am, sometimes I'm not, but yes, I can relate.

Actually sleep is a problem for me most nights. Not quite as extreme as some on here, I usually get between 4-5 hours a night, but I would really like one of those nights with a full 8 hours, uninterrupted. I take klonopin to help with sleep.
Meds keep my moods somewhat under control, but I still cycle with little relief in between, it's getting worse, but I'm trying to hold off until next month instead of changing my pdoc appt. because I have to pay out of pocket.
I think my t must feel like a broken record-next time I am going to suggest that she just record our sessions and play them for me depending on my mood (JK)

Originally Posted by bluemountains

(Mention of sui.)

For those of you who go to therapy, do you ever feel like you are paying your t to repeat what he/she said a few months ago?
My "up" conversation revolves around not quitting my meds, stopping the binge drinking, and quit playing with the benzos.
My "down" conversation (today's conversation) revolves around keeping a plan to change my thought patterns away from sui. Going back to keeping a mood chart, and promising to call if I get worse.
Around I go...it seems that the few hours/days I feel balanced is never a therapy day. I want my t to know that I do have regular thoughts. If only I could get a good night's sleep just once before I go, I could show that sometimes I have this bp thing is check!
Bluemountains

I believe the best time for a therapist...psych, to get me?...would be 'suddenly'....as has happened before during crisis team monitoring ...where they just call or turn up...with no warning

the appointments I have arranged...? ...these I go through myself for days in advance. why?....I don't know?

it seems a total waste of time after I have 'acted out' the consult in my head so meticulously I even dream I am there and the days I am 'chronic' are a few days before...(uncanny)

and by the time I arrive I am answering my own questions ....I tell the psych I have lived this appointment nonstop for days now I am exhausted being NUTS.

sometimes I have gone on benders just so I trick myself into arriving at these things...'suddenly'....and then I really 'show' myself....the dark dysfunctional me!

but make me anticipate events and I go invisibly crazy

...just too proud ...just too stupid smart...

[bluemountains]

Originally Posted by dubblemonkey

I believe the best time for a therapist...psych, to get me?...would be 'suddenly'....as has happened before during crisis team monitoring ...where they just call or turn up...with no warning

the appointments I have arranged...? ...these I go through myself for days in advance. why?....I don't know?

it seems a total waste of time after I have 'acted out' the consult in my head so meticulously I even dream I am there and the days I am 'chronic' are a few days before...(uncanny)

and by the time I arrive I am answering my own questions ....I tell the psych I have lived this appointment nonstop for days now I am exhausted being NUTS.

sometimes I have gone on benders just so I trick myself into arriving at these things...'suddenly'....and then I really 'show' myself....the dark dysfunctional me!

but make me anticipate events and I go invisibly crazy

...just too proud ...just too stupid smart...

You make me smile, James

I do the appt thing in my head, too, but I must be a bad judge of character because she never says the right thing-doesn't she know her lines?

Originally Posted by bluemountains

You make me smile, James

I do the appt thing in my head, too, but I must be a bad judge of character because she never says the right thing-doesn't she know her lines?

hehe...cool

it is like a play yes

[BlueInanna]

I liked the kind of therapy that had a sort of outline, like the mindfulness therapy - we would talk if I wanted, or she would teach me new meditations, sometimes hypnotic and very insightful.

Also I went to therapy to help deal with parenting my bp teen on drugs, and there was very much an outline there. Talk therapy if I wanted, and then handouts and information on addiction, parenting, communication, etc. But then that therapist broke up with me she just moved, i could still go to her if i need to in future. but her son is dating my daughter and that's probably a conflict of interest anyway lol.

[hamster-bamster]

Clonazepam gives me only three hours of sleep. Temazepam gives 8 hours of uninterrupted sleep - knock on wood.

[bluemountains]

Originally Posted by BlueInanna

but her son is dating my daughter and that's probably a conflict of interest anyway lol.

Yes, that could get a bit weird!

[bluemountains]

Originally Posted by hamster-bamster

Clonazepam gives me only three hours of sleep. Temazepam gives 8 hours of uninterrupted sleep - knock on wood.

Interesting. Both are benzos and from what I've read quickly on the internet, more people have success with clonazepam. I will talk to my pdoc next month (next visit) to check on the possibility of switching to one that is more effective. My pdoc is very careful, rightfully so, with prescriptions for me because I have addictive behaviors. I won't go into a confession mode, but I have manipulated my meds/alcohol at times in ways that are not healthy.

[Victoria'smom]

If T can get me to focus & interact w. her, we deal with whatever concerned her on my mood chart. If I'm 'okay' she probes me for information or talks to me about whatever. If I'm just not with her that day she'll repeat a couple of things but mainly: "There's a crisis center, if you need it. Only you'll know when you'll need it.", and "It's safe here.". If my husband is their, she'll talk to him, when I'm not mentally there with her. There is a common theme: taking meds, and trusting MH services.

[cocoabeans]

Originally Posted by bluemountains

Interesting. Both are benzos and from what I've read quickly on the internet, more people have success with clonazepam. I will talk to my pdoc next month (next visit) to check on the possibility of switching to one that is more effective. My pdoc is very careful, rightfully so, with prescriptions for me because I have addictive behaviors. I won't go into a confession mode, but I have manipulated my meds/alcohol at times in ways that are not healthy.

Don't "most people" have problems with falling asleep rather than staying asleep? Or at least that's what the drugs seem to be like. Get a few hours and wake up. Only acceptable when I'm just not tired at all.

Drug misuse isn't anything like addiction though.

Blue Mountains, I take .5mg of Clonazepam and 5 mg. Zyzal (a potent antihistamine
which gives me comfortable rest). Zyzal will need to be prescribed by a physician,
but it really helps me. It might for you, too, combined with a benzo for occasional
sleep disturbances. (For me, it's always the tea or a chocolate Milky Way or one
of those things that blocks my sleep--a little milk drunk after tea might stop the tannin
in tea from bothering your sleep, as it does for me.

Take care.

Glad you made the move successfully.

[bluemountains]

Originally Posted by genetic

Blue Mountains, I take .5mg of Clonazepam and 5 mg. Zyzal (a potent antihistamine
which gives me comfortable rest). Zyzal will need to be prescribed by a physician,
but it really helps me. It might for you, too, combined with a benzo for occasional
sleep disturbances. (For me, it's always the tea or a chocolate Milky Way or one
of those things that blocks my sleep--a little milk drunk after tea might stop the tannin
in tea from bothering your sleep, as it does for me.

Take care.

Glad you made the move successfully.

Thanks, genetic! Glad to see you back on the boards.