[OutlawedSpirit]

I feel like I'm stocking up to open a pharmacy Went to the pdoc again yesterday and she decided to completely change my prescriptions. The only thing that has stayed the same is the cogentin, although I'm not sure why I am taking it still. She gave it to me the last time to counter the muscle aches I got from being on respirdone, so I don't know why I am still taking it, but I'm going to be a good girl and take it anyways.

So the first new on the list is my trileptal. Instead of taking one at night and one in the morning, I'm taking two in the morning and one at night. She then completely took me off of lexapro. Seroquel and Klonopin where also added to my regiment. I actually had to buy a pill organizer yesterday cause now half of my stuff is taken in the morning and half at night, and I"m sure if I don't have something to tell me I forgot to take something, I will forget.

Last night I took half a Seroquel to start (they are 100 mg so I took 50 last night) and this morning when I woke up I felt loopy to say the least. Being up for an hour and a cup of coffee has seemed to help, but after I take my daughter to school, I have to take two trileptal and a klonopin, and I'm afraid of going back to loopy-ville.

Not to mention if half a seroquel did that to me this morning, what do I have to look forward to tomorrow morning? And I did get my 8 hours last night. When I do go back to work, I will only get about 6 before I have to get up to get my daughter ready and off to school. Am I even going to be able to? And is taking so many "anti-manics" for lack of a better term, and no anti-depressant now going to sent me in a tailspin down, when no ladder to get back up?

Any advice or words or encouragement would be nice. I've only been in the meds game for a month and I'm already starting to feel like a lab rat.

umm....meant somethin?

not sure what it was?

sorry

[Anika.]

Hmm,

If you no longer need the cogentin maybe you should ask her why you are still being prescribed it, maybe a good idea to get that sorted out. It has no effect on moods. Actually long term use of this med can cause it to become ineffective, if you ever did need it again, it could possibly not work.

Seroquel, because it is a major tranquilizer which is what antipsychotics are, yes will make you feel like that. Hard to predict, some people are less sedated by it and others more so. For me it is very sedative, and I do not adjust to it quickly at all, if ever really. 100 mg is not too high, but if that is how you felt this morning, then tomorrow morning might be much the same. Some people adjust to these meds quickly and can function on them sooner, I have no experience with that tho, these meds have always made me into quite a zombie. You may want to try to go to bed sooner if you can so that you have more time to sleep. I had to do that when I was on them so I was able to wake up with my kids in the morning. At least until you know how it is going to affect you.

No way of knowing really if you will tailspin down, unfortunately. Why did she switch all your meds if I can ask. Is the Klonopin take as needed? Are you taking that for anxiety?

I wish I could tell you to not feel like a labrat , pretty sure most of us feel that way. It is a lot of guess work.

Also, do your research before you take new meds, these meds can have serious side effects, always best to know what you could be getting into, whether you are comfortable taking them, and what to watch for.

[OutlawedSpirit]

Originally Posted by Anika.

Hmm,
No way of knowing really if you will tailspin down, unfortunately. Why did she switch all your meds if I can ask. Is the Klonopin take as needed? Are you taking that for anxiety?

I wish I could tell you to not feel like a labrat , pretty sure most of us feel that way. It is a lot of guess work.

Also, do your research before you take new meds, these meds can have serious side effects, always best to know what you could be getting into, whether you are comfortable taking them, and what to watch for.

She switched because I was originally on respirdone and lexapro, but I got a lot of muscle aches from the respirdone, so she switched that to trileptal two weeks ago, and she said if I was too manic with the lexapro to cut it in half.

I cut the lexapro in half because it made me so manic, I couldn't sit still, and I couldn't really focus enough to actually do anything either. About a week ago I started getting hallucinations, which I have never had before, but I don't know if it was rebound psychosis from the respirdone (which I was weaned off of) or if I was just super manic from taking the lexapro. So she added seroquel and klonopin. The klonopin I am supposed to take 0.5 mg once in the morning, then I can take a half pill later during the day on an as needed basis.

Monkey,

Thank you for reading my novel, especially when you didn't feel like it. I've had problems reading anything on the forums the past couple weeks because that takes a certain amount of focus that I just haven't had.

[Anika.]

Ok I see.

Well, ya hard to tell which one it was. I have had rebound psychosis and psychosis from ad's, I am so sorry this has happened to you. Are you handling that part ok?

The seroquel "should" then help bring you down, along with the klonopin. I say should, cause sometimes it can take time, sometimes a higher dose is needed, sometimes it has brought me down quickly.

Triliptal, I am not too familiar with, I have been on meds similar tho, So it is being used as a mood stabilizer which can help from bringing you down, I would think. I don't want to say anything since I have not taken it. I think it is similar to tegretol.

I hope you improve quickly. I feel bad, I know how that feels, and just the feeling of not knowing, and not knowing what to expect.

[OutlawedSpirit]

Originally Posted by Anika.

I hope you improve quickly. I feel bad, I know how that feels, and just the feeling of not knowing, and not knowing what to expect.

I think the worse part is figuring out what "normal" is. When I went to the pdoc yesterday, she asked how I felt, and I said "ok". I mean, I guess for me being 'ok' is not being depressed. I hate depression, and I'd rather be manic. Although since being manic tends to give me a really short temper, it's not ideal, but at least I can move. So when do I know when I've stabilized?

Before my dx I always sort of though my mania was "normal" because I didn't necessarily feel bad. I've done a lot of stupid, and I realize now that it is part of the impulsiveness that comes with mania, but I've never felt necessarily 'bad'. Sorry to rant, I just wish I knew what I should be looking for.

[Anika.]

I felt like that for a loooong time. What is stable, what is normal, what to expect when it arrives?

For me stable is = to content. I am neither up nor down. I am right in the middle of the road. Well maybe less exciting than mania, I know how I will react to things, I can predict how I feel upon waking, I know that when something stressful comes a long I will likely be able to manouver through it. I feel like I am the one steering the ship of me. And it was a big adjustment, cause that didn't feel right either at first. Scary almost.

However, it took me about 7 or so years to get there, not to be a downer. but it did. I was either always manic, depressed but not as often, mixed, maybe sort of stable for a month here, few weeks there. But others seems to find this a lot sooner. I don't think I was an easy one from my pdocs. And I never did find that med combo. But I found other ways that work for me.

I think navigating this thing takes a lot of time, energy, and being detectives on our selves. And some people do not like to let go of the mania, I had a hard time with that as well. After i started to realize how nice feeling content, peace, even predictability could feel I let go of that.

It's not a novel, trust me Write as much as you want!

[OutlawedSpirit]

When I'm manic, I think the most noticeable symptom, especially for people that don't see me all the time, is if I sit still, my leg bounces. My pdoc told me to try to focus on that and make it stop. I almost laughed at her. To make it stop, the easiest way if for me to just stand up. I can't help it. When I get too wound up, the energy has to go somewhere. I took my klonopin and my trileptal about half an hour ago and I am back in loopyville. I can say that although it feels like I just smoked a bowl, I am feeling good. Although I hope that it's something that will go away as my system gets more used to it, it will be a little hard to go back to work in a factory when I can't see quite straight. Of course, this is why I waited until after I took my daughter to school to take it. I may be crazy, but I'm not dumb. At least not most of the time.

[Clinte89]

I feel you feeling like a lab rat it's terrible to always being told try this Um no that went bad try this its like the age old question of which wire to cut no one knows lol if I where you I would t mind feeling like I was toking up everyday that could be nice lol

[OutlawedSpirit]

Originally Posted by Clinte89

I feel you feeling like a lab rat it's terrible to always being told try this Um no that went bad try this its like the age old question of which wire to cut no one knows lol if I where you I would t mind feeling like I was toking up everyday that could be nice lol

It would be nice, if I could actually function better like this. I will admit I like the floating feeling, but I also have a very addictive personality, and a lot of times the two don't mix, but I'll float as long as the pdoc says to. I just want to find something that works before it tears my relationship apart. We've been together over three years, and we're looking at getting married in December (well, I should say civil unionized) and if I lost this, I'm not sure I'd survive it. Just the thought of it makes me panic. Luckily my pdoc says that the meds should help calm that down. I pray that it does.