I'm not depressed (or am I?)

It's going still on edge still feel something is wrong even though I'm not sure what's wrong. Still cut this am, but I'm gonna try to leave it at that but I have a pdoc appt today at 4 and I see my therapist tomorrow, so hopefully we can work through this thing whatever it is. Thanks or askin how are you?

Well I'm at te doctor now so I hope they can help me and I have a therapist tomorrow I think she will be more help to me but oh well the pdoc is worth a try. Wish me luck peeps

good luck Clinte!

Good luck, Clint!

Hope you are better soon.

Well he upped my cogentin and said I that doesn't work take more lamictal. So well see but I think the t will be of more help. I tried to explain to my dad again and no luck they just don't get it

So how ya doin?

Not good Dan not good at all things are getting worse. I told them to take my pills but they are like ok but won't take them I don't think they understand how serious this is. Ugh fml so now I'm just fighting the urge really bad right now.

Keep fighting it honey!!! omg I want to call your parents and say it to them

Fight it Clinte, the alternative is Hospital again!!

Listen to music, jump up and down, distraction until the urge passes.

Something my 16 yr old son does is stomp his feet a lot, especially walking through the house. And I let him any hours because this is something he's found, making loud sounds releases energy for him. He figured this out on his own to keep from breaking things or hurting himself.

We gotta find a distraction for you. You can always change your path, you can do it, please do it.

Thanks blue I'm trying to find something other than cutting its not easy. I've been cutting all day again I'm sure your all disappointed in me but just can't seem to shake it. I hope everything is going on for everyone else.

imho, don't worry about disappointing us - you've got enough you're worrying about and already feeling bad enough about yourself we're here for support and helping.

did you talk to pdoc about possible adhd?

do you want to go into chat?

I did he doesn't seem to think that's a worry right now but maybe something we address when I get out of this funk. I would love to chat but I think I'm going to try to sleep I've only been getting about 4 hours a night over the past week. It's killing me. But I gave them t pills so I can't go through with my plan tonight. Thanks for all the support ladies and gents.

Ok, yes you need sleep. That could be a big part of this funk. Rest well my friend, thank you for giving them the pills, very smart.

Well I got 7 hours tonight waking up all night so it was better than its been. Still feeling really agitated and squirmy. I hope this passes soon. Thanks for all the support once again.

At least it's getting better. It may not be a huge improvement, but any improvement is better than none. I really hope this passes soon for you. Stay safe.

Yeah your right gotta try and celebrate the small stuff as well because its at least a step in the right direction. It just hard to see the positives sometimes, but at least in happy most the time but at the same time depressed and stressed as well. I don't understand things most times.

To respond to your first message, I think you need help and you should get to safety place.
I hope you are feeling better right now. If you want to talk about it, we are here!

I wish you the best!

Hi Clinte, How are you today?
So glad you went to the doctor and I believe you see your T today??
Please dont worry about us being upset with you, just worry about you right now. Im very proud of you for giving your pills to your parents, and that is no small thing that is a very big step out of the dark. Pat yourself on the back because I know that wasnt easy to do.

I've been up and down all day right now I feel myself slipping back into the depression which is not cool. But other than that I'm ok. Cut all morning but none since then.

I'm so glad you're not cutting now. Are things improving a little bit then? I hope so

They where and now I feel myself sinking again literally. I hope I can avoid the temptation I'm goin to try.

remember to try the 'rubbing till it burns' and the red ink and drawing over the targeted area!

Will do Dan. I think I will give up my razor my arms are starting to hurt constantly.

Clinte, I have scars all up and down my arms. Even some on my neck. I was in a psychotic delusion that it had to be done. You need to be seen or even go inpatient to get this under control. Right now with you dropping in mood again, it's an even bigger risk. You know this to be true. Please get some help. Now.
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How you doing today?