stages

Some of us are just starting out. Just now starting to understand the way we are feeling and our moods that are out of control. We are just starting to understand the emotional damage and impact that this disorder has brought into our lives. Just beginning to ask for help. It is a special time in our lives... one that you will never forget. Take care... it gets better and what seems so scary now will soon be second nature.

Some of us have just been through the rollercoaster ride of diagnosis and treatment. Everything has changed so fast for us that we are uncomfortable with just sitting idle and waiting now. Thinking, "is this the way that it's going to be forever?" Take heart, it does constantly get better, even though the episodes seem more pronounced and definite. It does get better and so do we at dealing with them.

Some of us have had time to decide if meds are right for us or not.. only being diagnosed this past year... having been on multiple meds at once and having levels constantly changed. Maybe been in for blood work a few times too. Having therapy prescribed and maybe even been in a few times or more. learning all about "Cognitive Restructuring" possibly....

But all of us have had experience identifying our own feelings, emotions, moods and reactions to all of them. We all have become experts on how we are feeling and what it means to feel a certain way or two. We are all learning to step outside of ourselves as a means of control and hold on when all hope seems lost. We are all dealing with something that attacks us on the deepest levels. We are strong. We are fighters and we are survivors.

Wow, that's deep and exactly how I feel about this (only been diagnosed in Jan) and then in serious denial. I've come to terms with it and embrace it daily owning it because it is mine! The most important thing for me is I am not Bi Polar I am Chihuahua living with Bi Polar and although it has changed who I am, I am still in control. (okay sometimes not) but everyday is learning experience and I wouldn't want it any other way.

We are all warriors.

I'm right there with ya, Dan. Been less than a year since I was diagnosed, and I'm still dealing with the fallout.......and yet, I am SO much stronger than I was then. Now I can tell the difference between a normal, "bleah" mood and a crash, a bad day and the beginning of a dysphoric mania. I don't catastrophize as much. I understand my triggers and let the people around me know that I'm not doing well, instead of lashing out in a rage or a torrent of tears.

All of that is a huge victory for me. I've wondered all my life why I was always just a few degrees off, why I had to learn everything the hard way.....now I know. And as much as the diagnosis changed me, I realize now that it wasn't necessarily for the worse.