Taking Meds Regularly

I know my husband has several meds prescribed for his bipolar ... and I know he's supposed to take them regularly. Is it helpful if I ask him "did you remember to take your meds?" or is that nagging?

Oh tough question... I would say have a discussion with him and ask specifically if asking him that question would be helpful or harmful.

Could go either way.

Good luck

I don't find it nagging at all when my husband asks me if I took my meds - in fact I'm often grateful for it because I tend to forget. But like morethingswrong said, it's best to ask him how he feels about that.

nagging, unless he wants to be reminded. Also... asking "did you take your meds?" when he gets upset in argument? B!tchery galore. Not saying you do it...

I guess it depends on him. If he is forgetful it might be helpful. Other ways he can remember is to set an alarm. Like the others say ask him.

thanks everybody for the input. and Venus, you're right, i didn't think about it that way ... if we're having an argument that would sound way bit*hy. I will keep that in mind.

your guys are right, i should just ask him how he wants me to handle it. he might like to be reminded since sometimes he does forget things ...

Also sometimes he might not mind being reminded and sometimes he might resent it... depending where he is at with it. That is how I was.

Venus brought up a good point about the asking when in an argument, when my bf and I would get in a disagreement, even if I had a legitimate point, he would always say " oh your not doing good right now", or " having you been taking your medication". And I can understand why this happens from the others persons perspective and an easy thing to get into, but nothing to make you feel less validated than that I think.

And so not saying that you do that at all, but I think from reading here lots.. it's common from family and friends. And they probably don't have bad intentions, hard to see what is what all the time.

Perhaps you can tell him you're concerned about his health and that you are just as concerned that he takes his meds everyday? You can tell him that it's not because you think he is slipping but because you love him and don't ever want to see him suffer. His health is important to both of you and not taking meds regularly is an unhealthy habit.

As for me, it showed me that my boyfriend cared when he asked me if I had been taking my meds regularly. I loved that he asked but at the same time was shy and a little embarrassed.

Being asked everyday may make you seem nagging or untrusting, perhaps a gentle reminding question once a week?

He needs a system to help him. Your reminders are not a good system. The system could be:

-- memory (that is what I use)
-- meals (that is what I also use, in conjunction with memory)
-- pill boxes of various sorts
-- alarms
--email alerts

etc etc

but no, not you

I guess it just depends on personality. I appreciate my husband's reminders. I have an alarm set on my phone that reminds me to take them, but often I'm busy when it goes off and ignore it, thinking I will get to it a bit later, but forgetting. Before we go to bed he'll casually check the pill box and if it still has the pills in it, he'll bring it in with a smile and hand it to me and ask how I'm feeling and if there is anything else he can get me. I never feel like he's nagging. It is extremely helpful to me. I do get how it could be perceived as nagging if the question were asked in an argument. But that's not how I think you meant. In my marriage, it's done out of love and concern, and I've never felt annoyed or upset by it. I appreciate his concern and know it comes from his love. I guess judging on the responses though many spouses might have strong opinions differently. So it definitely seems like something to discuss and ask him about.

PL, that does sound very loving and caring.

Hamster's comment reminded me: When I was on 3 different meds (yuck!!) I would place a hair tie on the neck of my morning and twice daily pills as a reminder. I took the hairbands off and put them on my wrist to indicate that I had taken the pills. And because I placed two hairbands on my twice daily, I would remove the second when I took the second pill.

I never had problems remembering my nightly pill, so I would use that moment to replace the hair bands on the other bottles. Of course, this is a better system to a female to use, lol.

Also, Piper seems to have a great system.

Edit: Please nobody take the 3 different med comment as offensive. Lol, just realized after I posted that a lot of members here are on much, much more.

Hey,

I would say ask him.... I know if my Sister or my Parent's approached me I would not be happy.... However saying that when my Support Workers ask me I don't mind lol!

I find it hard as its like a reminder of being ill

I love him so much and just want to make sure we're getting through this the best way possible. I appreciate the system approaches, those don't seem like personal shots or nagging at all.

you can just ask how's he feeling, how's his day been... you know, people talk. Meds can come later in the convo, by the way. But not as central point, imho...

I got a big ol' tray for my pills. It's supposed to be for weekly, 4 times a day, but I just use it as a monthly or really 4 weeks. I don't know how people can be bothered filling it every week, that would drive me nuts! I take all my meds at bedtime - not optimal but at least they get taken once a day. The tray / box is near the bathroom, last stop for the night.