shift but not fully better

So, my suspiciousness has eased off a bit. It's not fully gone, but a lot better than last week. But, I feel like I'm standing on unstable ground.

Living with too many people is really starting to get on my nerves. My mother-in-law eats everything in sight. She's like an eating machine, and it's driving me nuts. Her brother (who is staying with us temporarily) is okay with that... and he helps around the house. But, he keeps installing crap on my computer so he can talk to his "girlfriend" who lives in the Phillipines online. First it was extra tool-bars, and Yahoo! messanger, and now... a web cam... I don't like web cams! I hate them! And he got fired from his job, so last night he stayed up all night with all the lights on typing to her. And he doesn't type quietly, he like pounds the keyboard....

I just want it to be me and my husband and boys again.

ugh that sounds awful i could never live with others again, took us years for it to be just me and my wife, i hope you get you place back to your selves soon

Man DH, honestly I couldn't do it. I know you are in a very tough position with the mil, like where else can she go? But there has got to be somewhere...

You are making a move soon still? What is the plan for her, moving with you or maybe time for her to find different accomodations? I know she has limited income but there must be another option.

I really hope you can get back to living with just your husband and boys too.

I couldnt handle that and I thought I lived with annoying people. Geez that just obnoxious. Hang in there hope you get your place back soon.

MIL is supposed to move in with her brother. They were supposed to go on Saturday to put the deposit on an appartment, but since he got fired that didn't happen. One bedroom and studios are mroe than half her check. But she's talking like she could live on her own in one of those (yeah, right!) She wants to go, too. And he definately doesn't want to stay with us. And I want them both out! I love my mil but living with her is not easy. Plus her dog, who is like 100 lbs and if she was a human she'd be Kim Kardashian she's so spoiled. She's a big dog so when she eats it sounds like the crunching fills the whole house. And she whines to get her way, and if she doesn't get her way, she pees on the floor (this is a new behavior) and when she pees it's like a gallon of pee, not a trickle....

But, yeah, we're planning to put the first part of our deposit tomorrow on a place. The security check part, (the hard part to see if we qualify.) I keep imagining the apartment and using it like my "calm blue ocean" type of place. We're both excited to go and sad. My dad will sell the house and then die, so I'll have lost all my inheritance to his gold digging wife, right at the end... and we'll be totally without a safety net. BUT I will be free of that BS that my dad puts me through.... it's just not worth it.

Maybe knowing that failure is not an option will make me stronger.

Aww DH Yea I'd be crazy, totally going off on everybody... :/ I would probably break the webcam. That's a security risk, I keep a piece of tape over my laptop built in one, cuz I think people hack in and know how to watch people.

really? I covered it with a blanket when I was at my desk. That was Saturday, but then Sunday it was gone..... but I know it's installed. Like... if you were staying with someone who was nice enough to let you use their computer, would you be installing things onto it? I think it's rude. And, he doesn't even ask, he just does it. One morning I wake up and there is Yahoo! toolbar and instant messanger installed on my computer. And then, I wake up and there's a web cam. And, hello! Toolbars (even from places like Yahoo!) open you up to risks of viruses and spybots....

Aww yeah it is rude, sounds like he isn't very computer savy either with the downloading and toolbars yikes!! Exactly why my kids are not allowed on my laptop.

Maybe she can find a different roomate? You guys have helped her out for a long time. And she can take some responsability for her own arrangements. I know she has some problems but she sounds capable enough to figure it out too, and kinda sounds like she wants to. Sucks what tiny little amount of money she is recieving that makes it so difficult to make ends meet. It's the same here. But since she qualifies for disability is there like low rent or subsidized housing she could apply for. Not sure how that all works down there.

I think you are right tho, moving will set you free from your dad looming this over your head any longer and also keep him out of your business a bit. I think it's a good move. You know when my grandparents died they left my sisters and I a very large sum of money, but they entrusted my dad to disperse it to us. They did the same for my cousins who come from very well off families while we were the poor ones. My father also had money, he had a sucessful business going. He spent it all on who knows what since he was always manic and also had big addictions, sad since my sisters and I could have used it the most, maybe it would have been wiser to let my aunts handle ours also. But it's ok. Hard to miss something you never had, and somehow someway there would have been some sort of strings attached I think.

Freedom is worth all the money in the world.

Yes people can hack into your computer and acess your webcam. I put tape over mine too. Creepy.

I'll be sending all the positive energy that I can that you will qualify!! I really hope it works out. You know I tried using that power of attaction to get the place I have. I waited 6 years for this place and never heard anything, but within a month and half after using that attraction stuff I got a call. When I came to look at it there were two huge dragonflies left on the fences. Dragonflies have always represents my dreams coming to life. It seemed very cool to me. So keep on visualizing that calm blue ocean sanctuary in this place that you want.

Even if it turns out not to be "it" , keep focusing on what you do want, I really think it will show up!

That sucks wet rabid dog a.s.s.... To be soo forward and obnoxious to just personalise YOUR pc like he wants...ugh, atleast my Ex SIL asks to use my shyt....

Please ditch MIL, you and your family need to be just you guys again, she needs to find accommodation NOT in your house, it's important for peace-keeping and sanity -maintaining purposes...

I'm glad you're feeling somewhat better, you must have been terrified at the time you were in the thick of it ....

Also, as sad as it is on 1 hand, I'm really glad that you are being liberated from your dad's Grade A First Class BS, you are deserving and worthy, and people who treat you less than, they dont deserve to kiss the ground you walk on sis

Keep visualizing DH

Well, I got a job lead for my... uh... uncle in law? Hopefully it works out.

I am extremely stressed. My review at work is tomorrow. One of my co-workers (because everyone gets to review me, not just the boss... it's dumb...) printed out a copy of an unfinished review and left it on the printer last night, which I saw this morning when I got here (and was all alone, mwahaha...)

It wasn't fully complete. The comments weren't all filled in. The ones that were talked about how I've improved but still need to improve more. (Most of this was BS to begin with. Example last year they said my customer service was terrible, yet our patient survey showed that 98% of respondents gave me an "excellent" or "very good" response.) And some of it is my bipolar, like I need to keep being "more organized."

But then, we get points. And last year I got 3.23 points. This year, I'm getting 3.31 points... so.... I only improved by .08 points! Last year they told me my review was so bad they were going to fire me. And I only go up by .08 points after busting my *** all year? But now I need this job even more because we need to get an apartment, and if I slip up, we'll be homeless....

I have no where that I can be safe and feel safe right now. At home I'm in the constant judging/watching of MIL and her brother. At work I'm in the constant watching/judging of my co-workers. And then I have all the pressure that if I fail, we're screwed.... so... all the pressure and no safe place. It's so annoying.