[Patoman04]

Ok this may or may not sounds extreme to you guys, but I have BP so badly that during my mania, I went out and exercised to the point where I fractured my foot. I've worn a wrap for a while, but every time i have a manic episode, I take it off and run. Its incredibly painful, but I dont seem to ever care. I've run on a fractured foot 4 times now and its really messed up. Thing is, I cannot help the running. I'm kind of addicted to it. Its my one escape from all the pain where I can sense a little freedom in my life.

On the other side, My depression states are horribly low. I've attempted suicide 3 times in the past (im ok for now) I cut all the time... I have a lot of chronic pain, not only in my foot, but Arthritis in my back. This puts me down incredibly low all the time. I never have anyone to talk to when I'm so down. I get very irritable with my family, yelling and sometimes cursing at them when they simply want to help me. I cannot help my irritability, its out of control.

I tend to have on average 3 mood swings per day, usually very extreme and sudden. I can go from on top of the world to the lowest of lows in less than a second. Ive had as many as 6 mood swings in the course of 12 hours. Im on all sorts of medications including lithium . None of which help.

Im not really looking for sympathy at this point, I'm just curious if anyone has BP as badly as I do. If so, how do you deal with it. Its causing me to fail school so I need to find a way to control it.

[Travelinglady]

I don't have it this bad. I assume you have Bipolar I? What say the rest of you folks?

[Anika.]

Are you sure that the choice to ignore the injury is soley because of the bipolar? I am muchblike that as well. I tore my hamstring very badly in three places, at yoga non the less. I could feel the pain but I choose to ignore it as is usual for me and I also choose to keep pushing my body further. The torn muscles were cause over time from my hoicento ignore and keep pushing. I had sports physio and could not even extend my leg for a few mintgs making walking pretty difficult. The muscle had bleed all down the back of my leg, completely black before I acknowledged there was a problem. I have done this type of thing many times with injuries.

Anyways for myself that is not so much bipolar and more personality traits I have. That and bad self care (not wanting to see dr's) ignoring pain and signals from my body.

Just an idea on that that may or may not fit for you.

[krisakira]

My manic episodes have been considered hypomanic and I have had mixed episodes. But my depressive episodes are very extreme. I cut, have lethargy, can't get motivated, right now I have been told I have psychosis and I do not know what to believe but they say it is from my current depression episode. I can't really express here just how bad the depression gets, it feels like I'm dying inside my brain. Turning to slush. Everything goes in slow motion. Can't get up. Can't make decisions. Can't do chores. Horrible body aches, headaches, stomach aches. I have been able to drag myself to school though but that is just about it.

[Patoman04]

Originally Posted by krisakira

My manic episodes have been considered hypomanic and I have had mixed episodes. But my depressive episodes are very extreme. I cut, have lethargy, can't get motivated, right now I have been told I have psychosis and I do not know what to believe but they say it is from my current depression episode. I can't really express here just how bad the depression gets, it feels like I'm dying inside my brain. Turning to slush. Everything goes in slow motion. Can't get up. Can't make decisions. Can't do chores. Horrible body aches, headaches, stomach aches. I have been able to drag myself to school though but that is just about it.

I think you match me on the depression side. I've been there. I regularly miss classes because of the emotional pain. The only thing keeping me from dying is knowing the pain I'd cause my family from leaving this world. I sleep 17 hours a day and have constant pains. Wish both of our problems would just end.... :/

[emptyspace]

Hm.

I am classic Bipolar 1 and my mood episodes can be really bad. I have been "escorted" to the hospital by police for speeding in excess of 120 mph, been removed from bridges for believing I can fly, and done all kinds of crazy things during mania. When depressed, I have attempted suicide multiple times and been hospitalized for almost being catatonic.

That being said, my mood episodes are clearly Bipolar 1 because they last weeks and months, until my medication is adjusted to help. I currently take Lithium ER and Seroquel for my bipolar condition.

I don't ask this lightly... Are you sure that you are Bipolar?
If medication DOES NOT help at all, you might question your diagnosis, because Bipolar is a brain chemistry disorder, usually *successfully* treated with a combination of medications: mood stabilizers, anti-psychotics, anti-eptiletics, and sometimes anti-depressants (although the literature is changing about these). There are treatment plans and flowcharts that can dictate doctors in prescribing medicine.

If nothing helps, perhaps you should get a second opinion?? There are other mental health conditions that your symptoms could be indicative of and thus you might not be treated correctly.

[Patoman04]

Originally Posted by emptyspace

Hm.

I am classic Bipolar 1 and my mood episodes can be really bad. I have been "escorted" to the hospital by police for speeding in excess of 120 mph, been removed from bridges for believing I can fly, and done all kinds of crazy things during mania. When depressed, I have attempted suicide multiple times and been hospitalized for almost being catatonic.

That being said, my mood episodes are clearly Bipolar 1 because they last weeks and months, until my medication is adjusted to help. I currently take Lithium ER and Seroquel for my bipolar condition.

I don't ask this lightly... Are you sure that you are Bipolar?
If medication DOES NOT help at all, you might question your diagnosis, because Bipolar is a brain chemistry disorder, usually *successfully* treated with a combination of medications: mood stabilizers, anti-psychotics, anti-eptiletics, and sometimes anti-depressants (although the literature is changing about these). There are treatment plans and flowcharts that can dictate doctors in prescribing medicine.

If nothing helps, perhaps you should get a second opinion?? There are other mental health conditions that your symptoms could be indicative of and thus you might not be treated correctly.

I suppose I'm still finding all this out.... My doc mentioned Schizophrenia, but hasnt given me an official diagnosis. It has only been a month so I guess its possible that BP is a wrong diagnosis. I think time will tell, but idk what else it could be. I have psychosis as well because of hallucinations and voices. I'll be honest, I'm completely lost at this point. Just looking for some answers...

[TheDragon]

Originally Posted by Anika.

Are you sure that the choice to ignore the injury is soley because of the bipolar? I am muchblike that as well. I tore my hamstring very badly in three places, at yoga non the less. I could feel the pain but I choose to ignore it as is usual for me and I also choose to keep pushing my body further. The torn muscles were cause over time from my hoicento ignore and keep pushing. I had sports physio and could not even extend my leg for a few mintgs making walking pretty difficult. The muscle had bleed all down the back of my leg, completely black before I acknowledged there was a problem. I have done this type of thing many times with injuries.

Anyways for myself that is not so much bipolar and more personality traits I have. That and bad self care (not wanting to see dr's) ignoring pain and signals from my body.

Just an idea on that that may or may not fit for you.

I've more or less done the same thing, with my shoulder. I seriously injured it two years ago and didn't let it heal for long enough (or really get it attended). I'm only seriously getting it addressed now, because I pushed myself way too hard fighting and training until I literately couldn't use it.

I've certainly taken exercise to extreme levels when I've been at my highs before, but I agree that it's usually personality (I'm extremely stubborn) that's the biggest factor, although the highs can definitely play a part.

[cocoabeans]

Oh yes, the depression bit! It can get very bad for me. I don't feel like the details now.

The highs eh, I don't think mine are that bad. Sure, sometimes I get some strange thinking and don't sleep, say and do stupid things but they're alright. Enjoyable for the most part. I think I just get hypo manic anyway except the bizarre thinking might make me fully manic. I've never been hospitalize or close to it for mania though.

My moods last weeks or even months never only a few hours and even unmedicated I can go months maybe even a year without symptoms. Sure, some years I've had it bad where I've been up and down and in these mixed phases too but, generally it isn't so bad.

Intro psychology text books easily describe my bipolar. Isn't that stupid?

[Patoman04]

Originally Posted by cocoabeans

Oh yes, the depression bit! It can get very bad for me. I don't feel like the details now.

The highs eh, I don't think mine are that bad. Sure, sometimes I get some strange thinking and don't sleep, say and do stupid things but they're alright. Enjoyable for the most part. I think I just get hypo manic anyway except the bizarre thinking might make me fully manic. I've never been hospitalize or close to it for mania though.

My moods last weeks or even months never only a few hours and even unmedicated I can go months maybe even a year without symptoms. Sure, some years I've had it bad where I've been up and down and in these mixed phases too but, generally it isn't so bad.

Intro psychology text books easily describe my bipolar. Isn't that stupid?

I wouldnt call that stupid at all! Its a good thing that you can understand what you are struggling with. Trust me, I'd do anything to know what I'm dealing with right now and how to fix it. I feel like the only person in the world with mood swings that are pretty much hours long. Its out of control and getting me into a lot of trouble.

[cocoabeans]

I won't play diagnosis Internet so that isn't my point but, you're not totally alone with the hours long swings borderline personality has emotional swings that last only a few hours.

[Cocosurviving]

I'm BP1 and it was really bad at one point. I was misdiagnosed and on the wrong medicine. Things turned around for me after I was properly diagnosed, I started therapy weekly and started the right cocktail.