[nicole84]

I've seen some people around that are really sensitive to meds, I feel like I'm such a lost cause because I've been on around 15 different medications, all usually with far too intolerable side effects or they just don't do anything. The most recent is Abilify which I only had 2.5mg over 2 nights, had the terrible restlessness, worse insomnia, shakes, could barely stand. Saw my pdoc and she gave me Lorazepam to settle it but doesn't know where to go next. I know I have worse reactions with the more 'stimulating' ones, but I feel at a loss.

She's mentioned mood stabalisers but because of my hypersensitivity is unsure. Even talks about having me unmedicated. I've been that bad lately that I pretty much want to die every day. I haven't given up but so much of me wants to. I don't want to go back to self medicating with opiates which she knows about, but it's the only thing that has numbed my moods enough in the past to keep me going.

Sorry for the long post, I just need some support and maybe some ideas of other meds that won't be as brutal. The worst SE's I've had were Saphris, Abilify, Zoloft, Lexapro, Efexor (after years of it helping it became too much) plus another bunch of anti d's. Benzo's are helpful but only in the short term and I don't want to be an addict.

I thought Lamictal (in very small dosage) was helpful for about a year, Nichole.

Changes in diet had a lot to do with improvement in bipolar illness for me. You may
wish to investigate that. If you ever have any desire to talk about it, just post
a note to me on my account. I'll give you the help I found.

[intergalactictraveler]

Originally Posted by nicole84

I've seen some people around that are really sensitive to meds, I feel like I'm such a lost cause because I've been on around 15 different medications, all usually with far too intolerable side effects or they just don't do anything. The most recent is Abilify which I only had 2.5mg over 2 nights, had the terrible restlessness, worse insomnia, shakes, could barely stand. Saw my pdoc and she gave me Lorazepam to settle it but doesn't know where to go next. I know I have worse reactions with the more 'stimulating' ones, but I feel at a loss.

She's mentioned mood stabalisers but because of my hypersensitivity is unsure. Even talks about having me unmedicated. I've been that bad lately that I pretty much want to die every day. I haven't given up but so much of me wants to. I don't want to go back to self medicating with opiates which she knows about, but it's the only thing that has numbed my moods enough in the past to keep me going. Sorry for the long post, I just need some support and maybe some ideas of other meds that won't be as brutal. The worst SE's I've had were Saphris, Abilify, Zoloft, Lexapro, Efexor (after years of it helping it became too much) plus another bunch of anti d's. Benzo's are helpful but only in the short term and I don't want to be an addict.

Nicole,

We're not only in the same boat; we're of one mind. I'm even beginning to think that being married(18 years on May 12th plus 3 years of living together/no children) is more of a stress than a comfort, primarily because my wife is addicted to alcohol, from an alcoholic family and has her own psych problems which she won't deal with. Sorry for digressing, but, like you, I'm seeking some way of living that will allow me to have some type of life. It doesn't have to be perfect; I've given up on the quest for perfection. As difficult and painful as the journey is, don't give in to despair. I know life for you and so many others, is miserable, but maybe the answer is to find a way of living which is relatively comfortable, safe, and low stress. If your doctor or doctors won't think outside the box, then you have to. As Benjamin Franklin, one of the great minds of the American Revolution said, "If everyone is thinking the same, then no one is thinking."

this post shows me how lucky I really am. Zero side effects and heavily medicated. I wish you the best.

[Atypical_Disaster]

I know how you feel, I had a very similar reaction to abilify(insomnia, panic attacks, etc) & to several other drugs like it. I've taken Saphris too & ugh, it was horrible... muscle spasms, severe insomnia, restlessness, couldn't think at all, etc. I wish I knew what to tell you, but I'm sensitive to medications too. It's taken a long time to find one that I can even sort of tolerate & even then I don't know if I can be on it long term. I hope that you can find something that does work for you, or other things that don't involve meds.

[~Christina]

I'm sorry your having such a rough time. Finding meds that work can be exhausting.

Are you currently on any medication? Alot of people with Bipolar myself included can not take any type of AD. Could that be a possibility?

[nicole84]

Originally Posted by genetic

I thought Lamictal (in very small dosage) was helpful for about a year, Nichole.

Changes in diet had a lot to do with improvement in bipolar illness for me. You may
wish to investigate that. If you ever have any desire to talk about it, just post
a note to me on my account. I'll give you the help I found.

That's another issue for me as I have an ED too, which is at it's worst currently. Makes it hard having any meds that can increase my weight or appetite.

Originally Posted by intergalactictraveler

Nicole,

We're not only in the same boat; we're of one mind. I'm even beginning to think that being married(18 years on May 12th plus 3 years of living together/no children) is more of a stress than a comfort, primarily because my wife is addicted to alcohol, from an alcoholic family and has her own psych problems which she won't deal with. Sorry for digressing, but, like you, I'm seeking some way of living that will allow me to have some type of life. It doesn't have to be perfect; I've given up on the quest for perfection. As difficult and painful as the journey is, don't give in to despair. I know life for you and so many others, is miserable, but maybe the answer is to find a way of living which is relatively comfortable, safe, and low stress. If your doctor or doctors won't think outside the box, then you have to. As Benjamin Franklin, one of the great minds of the American Revolution said, "If everyone is thinking the same, then no one is thinking."

My partner is alcoholic too, with his own psych problems but mostly stable. I feel like I'm a burden half the time and I'd be better off alone to just hide away in my miserable life. Also at an all time low as I've had issues my whole life. When does it ease up? I couldn't do another 29 years of this. I try and think outside of the box, I'm usually the strong one but the past few months I've just broken.

Originally Posted by Atypical_Disaster

I know how you feel, I had a very similar reaction to abilify(insomnia, panic attacks, etc) & to several other drugs like it. I've taken Saphris too & ugh, it was horrible... muscle spasms, severe insomnia, restlessness, couldn't think at all, etc. I wish I knew what to tell you, but I'm sensitive to medications too. It's taken a long time to find one that I can even sort of tolerate & even then I don't know if I can be on it long term. I hope that you can find something that does work for you, or other things that don't involve meds.

Yeah sounds very similar! What helps you? Unmedicated I'm even more of a mess.

Originally Posted by ~Christina

I'm sorry your having such a rough time. Finding meds that work can be exhausting.

Are you currently on any medication? Alot of people with Bipolar myself included can not take any type of AD. Could that be a possibility?

I've been withdrawing off of Prozac for awhile now, and even the pdoc has been saying I'm a lot more depressed without it so I'm even thinking of going back on that at a small dose. There's a lot of trial and error and I'm so scared of other meds and reactions. Seroquel has helped but the appetite thing can be a problem too.

[ultramar]

Yikes, I'm so sorry. In the past has anything, except the benzo's, helped you? Your pdoc has suggested going off of everything, certainly a risky proposition, but maybe after trying so many, after having all of these different meds in your system for so long, it would be helpful to get them all out of your system and then start over with whatever most helped you in the past, if deemed appropriate.

Since you've been on so many meds (and maybe several at the same time?) I can see how after a while it might get hard to distinguish between the side effects and withdrawals (as you try new ones) of/from the meds and what are symptoms of the illness. I can see how it could get really mixed up. This is also why I wonder if getting everything out of your system first might be helpful -what was your pdoc's reasoning? If you do do this, I imagine you will need to be monitored very closely.

I'm sorry you're having such a hard time and hope you can get the meds worked out soon!

[nicole84]

Originally Posted by ultramar

Yikes, I'm so sorry. In the past has anything, except the benzo's, helped you? Your pdoc has suggested going off of everything, certainly a risky proposition, but maybe after trying so many, after having all of these different meds in your system for so long, it would be helpful to get them all out of your system and then start over with whatever most helped you in the past, if deemed appropriate.

Since you've been on so many meds (and maybe several at the same time?) I can see how after a while it might get hard to distinguish between the side effects and withdrawals (as you try new ones) of/from the meds and what are symptoms of the illness. I can see how it could get really mixed up. This is also why I wonder if getting everything out of your system first might be helpful -what was your pdoc's reasoning? If you do do this, I imagine you will need to be monitored very closely.

I'm sorry you're having such a hard time and hope you can get the meds worked out soon!

I was actually mostly just on Prozac after Effexor's side effects were too much again (was on and off it many years) since around July last year. Things started going down hill and I couldn't handle my emotions or moods or sleep then I ended up with an opiate addiction just to get me through the day/night. It numbed me but I realised I had a problem and went off it cold turkey in February. I guess anti d's have helped in the past, but Effexor ended up sending me too high and my insomnia a lot worse. The Prozac must do something cos I'm feeling awful without it, but I don't know anymore.

Since then I've still been on the Prozac, with Seroquel as needed. It helped me get off the opiates, it does help me sleep but I hate the hunger. At the moment I'm about a month off Prozac with a couple of tiny doses to get the brain zaps gone and cos I had no idea what else to do.

I felt at such a loss when she said there isn't many meds left. I've only been on anti d's by themselves mostly.. they rack up the tally to about 10. Still never been on an actual mood stabiliser so that could be a go next.

Benzo's I've pretty much been on the past 8 years, but I wouldn't say I'm addicted. More on an as needed basis. This year at least once a day usually at night to help my insomnia and racing mind.

[~Christina]

have you tried Lithium ? It's weight neutral for me.

I don't understand your Doctor saying there isn't many options left ... Maybe you need a second opinion?

[ultramar]

Originally Posted by nicole84

I was actually mostly just on Prozac after Effexor's side effects were too much again (was on and off it many years) since around July last year. Things started going down hill and I couldn't handle my emotions or moods or sleep then I ended up with an opiate addiction just to get me through the day/night. It numbed me but I realised I had a problem and went off it cold turkey in February. I guess anti d's have helped in the past, but Effexor ended up sending me too high and my insomnia a lot worse. The Prozac must do something cos I'm feeling awful without it, but I don't know anymore.

Since then I've still been on the Prozac, with Seroquel as needed. It helped me get off the opiates, it does help me sleep but I hate the hunger. At the moment I'm about a month off Prozac with a couple of tiny doses to get the brain zaps gone and cos I had no idea what else to do.

I felt at such a loss when she said there isn't many meds left. I've only been on anti d's by themselves mostly.. they rack up the tally to about 10. Still never been on an actual mood stabiliser so that could be a go next.

Benzo's I've pretty much been on the past 8 years, but I wouldn't say I'm addicted. More on an as needed basis. This year at least once a day usually at night to help my insomnia and racing mind.

It sounds like it might take a while/more time for you to adjust physically and psychologically from being off of the opiates -maybe that's partly what's going on?

Why did you go off of the Prozac? It sounds like it was the Effexor that was causing problems, but maybe I missed something -or your pdoc just wants you to try being off of everything.

It sounds like you mostly struggle with depression with maybe some hypomania as a result of Effexor? Maybe that's why you haven't been put on a mood stabilizer yet? Did your mind race before the opiates and/or when not taking Effexor?

Are you in therapy? Whatever your diagnosis ends up being (sounds like you've had quite a few, but you said this pdoc is holding out for the moment) it may help with mood regulation and getting to the bottom of why your moods have been all over the place.

Good luck.

[hamster-bamster]

Originally Posted by nicole84

The most recent is Abilify which I only had 2.5mg over 2 nights, had the terrible restlessness, worse insomnia, shakes, could barely stand. Saw my pdoc and she gave me Lorazepam to settle it but doesn't know where to go next.

Lorazepam is not the standard of care to counteract the terrible restlessness caused by Abilify. There are a number of other medications available... I believe that Cogentin, Propranolol, and something else - at least three different options.

Restlessness occurs in 25% of patients taking Abilify so you are not in any way hypersensitive - it is the most typical reaction to Abilify.

[nicole84]

Originally Posted by ~Christina

have you tried Lithium ? It's weight neutral for me.

I don't understand your Doctor saying there isn't many options left ... Maybe you need a second opinion?

She's actually really good, it's just that I've had so many bad reactions to medications that she's not sure where to go next I think.

Originally Posted by ultramar

It sounds like it might take a while/more time for you to adjust physically and psychologically from being off of the opiates -maybe that's partly what's going on?

Why did you go off of the Prozac? It sounds like it was the Effexor that was causing problems, but maybe I missed something -or your pdoc just wants you to try being off of everything.

It sounds like you mostly struggle with depression with maybe some hypomania as a result of Effexor? Maybe that's why you haven't been put on a mood stabilizer yet? Did your mind race before the opiates and/or when not taking Effexor?

Are you in therapy? Whatever your diagnosis ends up being (sounds like you've had quite a few, but you said this pdoc is holding out for the moment) it may help with mood regulation and getting to the bottom of why your moods have been all over the place.

Good luck.

Yeah my mind racing and messed up thoughts has gotten worse over the years. I had a full on out there episode just over a year ago that one psych put me in the bipolar I category but it's more lower or mixed episodes/moods that I seem to be having atm.

Originally Posted by hamster-bamster

Lorazepam is not the standard of care to counteract the terrible restlessness caused by Abilify. There are a number of other medications available... I believe that Cogentin, Propranolol, and something else - at least three different options.

Restlessness occurs in 25% of patients taking Abilify so you are not in any way hypersensitive - it is the most typical reaction to Abilify.

I think it's more that I'm so sensitive to pretty much all of the meds I've taken. Except Prozac, I can mostly tolerate it. And benzos which aren't a long term fix.

[~Christina]

This is just what I would do... just me .

I would have my Pdoc taper me off every damn pill, detox your system and then try 1 medication at a time and allow your body to adjust to it fully before adding another.

Again just what I would do.

I hope you find some relief soon.

[hamster-bamster]

Originally Posted by ~Christina

This is just what I would do... just me .

I would have my Pdoc taper me off every damn pill, detox your system and then try 1 medication at a time and allow your body to adjust to it fully before adding another.

Again just what I would do.

I hope you find some relief soon.

I agree, except for the Abilify/restlessness thing. If you take Abilify and develop restlessness (as do 25% of people who take it), you need an "antidote" medication to take alongside with Abilify.

[nicole84]

Originally Posted by hamster-bamster

I agree, except for the Abilify/restlessness thing. If you take Abilify and develop restlessness (as do 25% of people who take it), you need an "antidote" medication to take alongside with Abilify.

Nah they had to take me off that instantly. I only had 2 quarter doses in two days and ended up at the hospital. Looks like it's just Prozac again until I see her, which has lifted my depressed mood that's for sure. Probably will end up too 'up' though...

[notALICE]

Mood stabilizers - I'm on Gabapentin, which is actually an anti-seizure med. it's helped a great deal. In the beginning the morning dose made me sleepy, so that dose was increased gradually. I've also had the added benefit of no monthly migraines. My Pdoc just added Trileptal, because Gabapentin is not supposed to be effective enough on its own. So far zero side effects. He said the Trileptal will help with the depression I've seemed to come down with after mania.

That's my experience so far. I was on other meds and had negative side effects too. It can take time and patience to find the right balance. I was fortunate that it only took a few months for me.

I've heard very good things about Lamictal also. (I was one of the few who got a rash, can't take it).

I hope you & your Pdoc find the right balance, so you can feel better. I liked Christina's suggestion. Easier to pinpoint what will work if you're not flooded with a bunch of different meds.

[nicole84]

Ok so my pdoc started me on Tegretol 3 days ago, so far so good. Which is definitely a change for me and new meds. My first proper 'mood stabilizer' though. Main thing I'm noticing is the spacey feeling and brain fog. Especially at night after I take it, today was until about 3pm. Only started on 100mg for a week to see how I go (from being so sensitive) then up to 200mg next week.

So hopefully this works out. Still on 20mg Prozac in the morning too. Fingers crossed.