[comicgeek007]

So panicky I'm about to cry. Memories of first psych stay crushing me. Don't have anything left to sew to stay calm. Lost my appetite. Binged this morning until I felt sick but didn't purge because I had to clean the kitchen.

I feel so weak even thinking about going back on my meds, but I can't tell how much of this is withdrawal. I don't even know how much of my dose I should take if I do take them since I haven't taken them in five days and I usually take them in the morning. Almost dinner now. Still not hungry. Didn't have lunch. What do I do?!

[wildflowerchild25]

look up some anxiety coping skills, such as mindfullness meditation. realize that this will pass. know that it indeed could be withdrawal.

sit back, take a breath, and realize that you're ok ;-)

<3

[comicgeek007]

I wanted so desperately to purge tonight but I had to go out with my family before I had the chance. Measured my waistline and it's gotten inches bigger since I last measured. I'm afraid to step on the scale. No amount of meditation is helping my thoughts are going too fast to shut them off. I really want to hurt myself but I'm afraid of getting put back on antidepressants that just made me stupid happy and crazy. That's the main reason I wanted off my meds in the first place. Oh god I can't go back to the psych ward again.

[comicgeek007]

Having fits where I'm moving like someone's got me on puppet strings. So hard to type like this. AUGH!!?!

[ultramar]

Don't you have that temp pdoc appt coming up? When is it?

[comicgeek007]

I have a temp t who is the gatekeeper for whether I get to see a temp pdoc. Even if I go back on my meds I'll run out soon without being able to get to see a dang pdoc!

[ultramar]

Originally Posted by comicgeek007

I have a temp t who is the gatekeeper for whether I get to see a temp pdoc. Even if I go back on my meds I'll run out soon without being able to get to see a dang pdoc!

I thought you had said that your father had arranged for an appt with the temp pdoc -for the end of the week, I think it was? T as pdoc gatekeeper makes no sense to me, especially since you're on meds.

That you may eventually run out is no reason not to take meds. Surely the temp would make sure you have enough re-fills or you could call for more refills if you run out.

Is there anything, comicgeek, that you can do to help yourself? You seem to have some support: T, temp pdoc, you said your father was making appointments for you; I know you're in a bad place, but I think you need to start thinking about what you can do for yourself, what steps you can take towards getting better. You make it sound hopeless and that you are helpless, neither is true. Please take care.

[redbandit]

Can ur regular dr prescribe ur meds for you? Thats what mine did when i was in between pdocs.

[comicgeek007]

Originally Posted by ultramar

I thought you had said that your father had arranged for an appt with the temp pdoc -for the end of the week, I think it was? T as pdoc gatekeeper makes no sense to me, especially since you're on meds.

That you may eventually run out is no reason not to take meds. Surely the temp would make sure you have enough re-fills or you could call for more refills if you run out.

Is there anything, comicgeek, that you can do to help yourself? You seem to have some support: T, temp pdoc, you said your father was making appointments for you; I know you're in a bad place, but I think you need to start thinking about what you can do for yourself, what steps you can take towards getting better. You make it sound hopeless and that you are helpless, neither is true. Please take care.

Taking a day off work, thankfully I work for my dad, so I can get some things sorted out. Including getting back on my meds for the time being.

Thanks.

[comicgeek007]

Originally Posted by redbandit

Can ur regular dr prescribe ur meds for you? Thats what mine did when i was in between pdocs.

maybe. I'll look into that.

[ultramar]

Originally Posted by comicgeek007

Taking a day off work, thankfully I work for my dad, so I can get some things sorted out. Including getting back on my meds for the time being.

Thanks.

Did you go to the temp pdoc appt, or is it this week?

[Vossie42]

High levels of anxiety are horrible. I hate that feeling of jumping out of my skin or that I'm just almost about to run down the street screaming. At times like that, I take some anti-anxiety medicine to take the edge off the anxiety and bring it down to a level where I can work on it. Do you have any anti-anxiety meds to help you deal with the current crisis? If you go back on your regular meds, you'll probably find that you feel better.

I hear ya on not wanting to be dependent on meds. I would much rather not take meds. But the alternative is to live a life of extreme misery and flat-out disability. No thanks. I'll take the meds.

I hope you feel better soon. You sound calmer now.

[comicgeek007]

Originally Posted by ultramar

Did you go to the temp pdoc appt, or is it this week?

I have my t appt on friday, at least.

[ultramar]

Originally Posted by comicgeek007

I have my t appt on friday, at least.

Sorry for pushing this, but I thought you had a temp pdoc appt maybe last week, or soon? Because you clearly have been having huge issues with your meds and I was hoping this temp pdoc could help you with it? Can you share what happened?

[comicgeek007]

Originally Posted by ultramar

Sorry for pushing this, but I thought you had a temp pdoc appt maybe last week, or soon? Because you clearly have been having huge issues with your meds and I was hoping this temp pdoc could help you with it? Can you share what happened?

just found out my pdoc appt is tomorrow.

"share what happened"? to the pdoc? of course.

[ultramar]

Originally Posted by comicgeek007

just found out my pdoc appt is tomorrow.

"share what happened"? to the pdoc? of course.

T and pdoc on the same day?! That's going to be intense! Hope it all goes well.