[babs92]

Hi everyone. I am new here. I was diagnosed with Bipolar Affective Disorder (what its called here in the UK) with hypomania and mixed states back in May this year. I am reviewed monthly under a pscyhiatrists staff doctor for my medication. I started on Depakote 750mg daily with 50mg Sertraline and have kept with this dose.

I started psychotherapy 3 weeks ago and its all pretty painful going back in my past, lots of abuse etc. but even prior to this I was feeling pretty low again, but now feel even worse. I did expect that maybe I would feel like this in therapy initially anyway.

I think maybe my meds are not right for me, although Depakote seemed fine initially - maybe I need the dose changed. I have read so much about lithium and it sounds better for depression (if I could get off Sertraline and onto this maybe, I dont know).

I was immediately taken off 75mg Effexor when I was in the manic phase as they said it was a major trigger.

I am also going through a tremendous amount of stress right now and feel a lot of anxiety. I have found out my neice has also been abused and its very close to home for me. I can't deal with it and can't help her, she is 12 years old and wants to live with us, but feel so torn and my family are hell to be around.

I would appreciate some help, with thanks.

[Sarah116]

Blah! That must feel awful. Here is a quote that might help you "The rainbows follow the storms." I hope you find something to help. Remember there are lots of meds out there and other therapies. Some no one know of yet.

[darkeyes]

Bummer, so sorry to hear that, so much coming at you at once, extremely difficult stuff.
Look over the many threads here and under Drug questions forum, you'll get to see first hand opinions on the meds we have all tried or on at the present.
Some meds work for some people while for some, different meds, so unfortunately it takes time to get it just right or pretty damn near.
Whatever, do not lose faith in meds or therapy, that is something that happens to peoplke when all this is new to them, and even sometimes for those dealing with disorders, from time to time.
If something isn't going right and you feel it may be med related call the pdoc, don't wait till your next visit.
I see mine once every 2 months, but am asked to never delay if something doesn't seem right, and not just meds only, it pertains to my risk of deepening depression, etc.
I wish you lots of luck and healing with this.
Welcome to PC, glad you found us.
DE

[babs92]

Hi Sarah, thanks for the quote - that's really nice will keep it in mind.

Hi Darkeyes - yes it is all exhausting. On Monday it took me so much courage to leave my house just to walk down to town, the tension in me was terrible, almost like claustrophobia. I havent been out walking in weeks, I am going to ring my doc and tell her.

I will have a look at the threads on here as well. Thanks for that. I know that Depakote did initially work for me and kept me stable but this added stress has not helped me with my neice. I also have a special needs son to cope with too and a 12 yr old daughter who is fast into puberty!

Thanks again

[darkeyes]

Wow, so much at once, please take care.

((((((((( babs92 ))))))))))))

[dottie]

I am sending healing thoughts your way. God bless and keep you safe!

[DaveyJones]

Wow...I must say that you really do have a tremendous amount to deal with...I'm sorry.

Your stress level alone is plenty to keep you depressed...some sort of stress management, exercise, deep relaxation are in order...

You're right about the Depakote...that will do nothing for bipoar depression. Lithium may or may not help, there's research both ways. Lamotrigine (Lamictal in the US) is very helpful in bipolar, both for mood stabilization and help with depression.

My personal bias is that the newer antidepressants should be avoided if at all possible, the potential for mood instability is significant...but I'm an unemployed crazy person , so take it for what it's worth!

I hope things get better for you soon...I know how miserable things can be.

DJ

When I first started on meds, I went to my provider every 2 weeks to get them tweaked. It took a yr. to get on the right ones (Depakote helped me with agitation but did nothing for my depression when I was in a mixed state). I'm off the Depakote, but do take Lamictal that seems to help with the depression, as well as Abilify.

The side effects from Lithium & Geodon were too severe for me. Each person is an individual & needs very individualized help in determining the right meds, but the meds have helped me tremendously so have hope.

The therapy maybe can help you deal with all the stress that is in your life. Take care.--Suzy

[babs92]

Hi everyone and wow thanks for all your replies!

DJ - yes its all too much to cope with. Just been to my doc and gave her a sheet of paper with all my symptoms over the last two weeks, it helped to do this as some of it was pretty personal to me. The upshot is she wants to up the dose of Depakote to 300mg three times a day from 200mg three times a day. I am staying on Zoloft 50mg.

I asked then about lithium but because I had hypomania she said they don't prescribe lithium because of side effects and only for more severe cases of bipolar. So I don't know what to make of it all but have accepted the higher dose for now and see how I go. Yes I have crashed into depression again and she agreed the symptoms are very similar to the first episode. I forgot to ask about any other meds though. Just felt like please give me something now to help me!

Exercise - ahhh been feeling panicky about going out the door for some weeks now, its really tough going. She has given me some valium for a week to help me sleep at night, have had racing heartbeat back again as well. I will certainly try to get out a bit more even just to walk round the block.

Suzy - yes am hoping that therapy will help with the stress and find new ways to cope - my therapist is away next week though just when I need him the most!

Thanks again all for your kindness and understanding.

[babs92]

Arghhh.......just picked up the Depakote (or so I thought) from the chemist and the doc has prescribed 100mg crushable tablets so that means I have to take 9 of these a day!! This can't be right. I do know that Depakote only comes in 250mg or 500mg strengths but reading the leaflet inside this new box the drug is called Epilum (antiepileptic) and it doesnt have any reference to it being a mood stabiliser. Am really worried about taking these and calling doc in the morning - I really dont want be popping all these pills each day.

[DaveyJones]

Hi Babs...

Depakote and Epilum are the same, chemically, valproate sodium. Not to worry there, but I sure wouldn't want to take all those pills, either!

peace,
DJ

[bizi]

dear Babs
Perhaps you called your doctors office to verify the dose today.....call the pharmacist if you have not ASAP!
It is very strange to have been switched to a chewable from a pill and not to have been forwarned about it.
You may want to bring notes and take notes when you see your doctor so that way you won't forget to ask about something while the doctors are so limited on time.
I have had great success taking lamictal which is now highly recommended for the treatment of bipolarism and the action leans toward antidepressant qualities as well.
I used to take geodon to help me sleep....now take ambien when lunesta stopped working.
I wish you well.
bizi
Hang in there ...it takes a while to get the meds cocktail jsut right!

[tlynn1019]

Hi Babs, I am so sorry that you are not feeling well. I was diagnosed last May and I am experiencing difficulties from time to time also. I realized that I have been bipolar for a very long time and it has taken a toll on me emotionally and this disease has affected my entire life. However, I am grateful that I know what I have, and that there is hope through meds and therapy. My therapist told me that as far as the meds go there is an element of trial and error. So, hang in there. Stress seems to trigger my mania. Life is so stressful at times and it is so difficult. I call my pdoc when I'm not feeling right and he makes the adjustments to my medication. I have found that this forum offers so much understanding from people who experience similar difficulties. It also is a comfort to me to know that I can be helpful to someone else through offering my experience, strength and hope. I offer you my compassion, my love and my prayers. Take care, Tlynn1019

[(JD)]

Let me also encourage you to hang in there! Stablizing on medications when you have bipolar affective disorder is one of the more difficult things you will need to do...it takes a long time and many tries for most. Don't give up, you really haven't been trying very long (I know, it feels like forever) and the doctor probably will be able to stablize you eventually. TC

[babs92]

Hi to you all again

No worries, getting the right Depakote tomorrow morning - slow release 500mg twice a day! phew.........good job I phone my doc.

Thanks for all replies once again - this forum is fantastic and so supportive. I hope to give back a little when I start to feel better about myself too.

Glad you called the doc! Sleep is very important for stabilizing bp. I take Trazadone now to make sure I sleep since I had a recent hypo manic episode that ended up in a bad crash into despair & depression which led me to some dangerous behaviors.

I go see my meds provider again in a week as I'm slowly increasing my Lamictal, as well. Lamictal has helped a lot in the past for the depression. Take care & don't give up!--Suzy