[henrydavidtherobot]

I know that this probably isn't the place for it, but I talked about it earlier and so I figured that I'd bring it up again.

I seriously can't get over this guilt over how much I'm eating. I'm going to have one beer at the bar tonight, and all that I can't think about is the calories. I keep getting hungry and cravings and eating until I'm stuffed. I feel horrible and guilty. My mum bought me two bottles of Sriracha because she knows that I love it and I feel awful because I opened one three days ago and its half gone. That's a reckless way to treat a gift.

I'm tiny, but I feel bloaty and gross and am forcing myself not to hide in tonight. I'm trying to exercise beforehand and walked to school today to burn off some calories. I'm not depressed. Is this typical PMS, or am I possibly on the verge of a relapse? I'm a recovered bulimic. I switched to alcohol way early in that illness because I got caught, but when I binge drank and made myself purge, no one could catch me (for awhile).

Sorry if this seems trivial. I'm ridden with guilty and really distressed :/

[Happy Camper]

If I were you, I'd have an mri because some of these psych meds (risperidone I'm looking at you) can sometimes cause small "benign" brain tumors. Just recently there was a girl in the news who had brain surgery where something went wrong I think with her pituitary gland. Now she can't stop eating and became obese practically overnight. Unlikely and not meant to scare you, but something to consider.

I'm a 6 foot 190 pound man and I can comfortably get by on less than a 1000 calories for a day or two if I must. My only other advice is to drop every addicting substance you consume. I don't eat pasta, sugar that isn't from fruit, grains (other than a very specific bread on occasion), processed,/fast food, and I only drink water most days. After making that change my energy and sleep is better, my emotions are less volatile, while exercise was the only thing that leveled out my mood and stress.

Dont get too stressed, this could just be typical PMS, track your symptoms and see if they happen next month.

[Qbug223]

You're binging, it's not a tumor.

Now, I know exactly how you feel. My Depakote is making me gain (not anymore since we are tapering now, thankfully switching to Topomax on Monday) and I feel guilt with every bite, especially when I feel bloated. Like, I can't feel good about myself unless I go to the bathroom and feel empty.

I also am a sufferer of anorexia. I just had a baby two months ago, so my weight loss is going slow right now. It sucks.

Hugs to you, hopefully you feel better!

[henrydavidtherobot]

Qbug, I sure you look great. Be sure to keep yourself healthy for you and your family. Congrats on the baby.

Now I'm craving veggies. I bought take out because I was at a friend's and hungry. I feel bad about the money and bad food. I feel like I'm lacking a nutrient. Maybe vit D. I want to go to the store and buy lots of good, healthy food, but even though I got a lot of money for Christmas, I feel guilty. Maybe this is temporary, but I feel doomed to an existence of binge eating and non productiveness (I just graduated college).

What could trigger the binging? Something is going on. Any evidence if me losing my looks is causing me emotional distress. Am I just in transit. This probably seems so frivolous.

I just want to exercise everything out and have thought of throwing up. If my bulimia is returning, I'm going to be so scared. It's awful and I've been happy. How can it just emerge when you're happy?

[Trippin2.0]

My bipolar cycles directly affect the amount and quality of food I eat. It doesn't affect my weight though, my body seems to be allergic to fat.

When hympomania hits, I will binge like its going out of fashion. I'm perpetually hungry and crave "heavy" food, mostly junk food. I eat until I roll over and 2 hrs later I do it all again. I would eat the furniture if I thought it tasted like pizza.

When I'm depro, I forget to eat. Once I nearly fainted and was very confused as to why because I'm not the fainting typ. lol it was because it was my 3rd day sans food. That's the extent of no appetite and forgetting to eat I experience.

Maybe its your pms, maybe its your mood, maybe its a med, as mentioned above record it and see if you find any correlations. If I were you I would worry more about the feelings and thoughts (eg. Guilt) that accompany the eating as you have a history of ED and may need to address those.

[henrydavidtherobot]

You're probably right. I do tend to forget to eat when I'm depressed too. Maybe that's what's going on, or maybe just a handful of things at once and I'm over thinking it. I posted in the ED forum about mt history and the guilt. Thank you.

[Qbug223]

When I'm depressed I dont eat a thing. And I am fighting the urge to binge right now ugh...monday cant get here fast enough. I need to just throw this damn depakote out the window.

[henrydavidtherobot]

Qbug, I hope you feel better soon!