[Patsy Cline]

Originally Posted by Notnrml85

Well, urgent care sent me to the ER and then the ER admitted me to the hospital cause I have some infection somewhere in my body. I just wanna sleep with my husband in our own bed tonight. But that's not gonna happen I had a panic attack after doing a MRI. Today sucks.

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I hope you start feeling better soon

[Patsy Cline]

Originally Posted by charo224488

Trying to get off xanax myself and I feel like I'm dying. Horrible nausea, migraine, dizzy, shaking like a leaf. And this is day one. I can't do it- I have to take it. I feel like a weak, stupid addict. How will I ever know if I'm really ill if I can't stop the drugs? And this is just the xanax, taken prn. What about the antidep.? If I can't even cut back on xanax how can I ever stop the other one? I'm so weak and ashamed of myself. I'm such a baby- scared of the panic, the sickness, scared I'll have a seizure. So sick of being afraid all the time.

Then don't stop taking them. If a diabetic feels ashamed that they can't live without drugs, what would you say to them?
Emotional and mental diseases are just as life threatning as physical ones and No one should feel ashamed for depending on Rx meds to feel better. Not even you

[Patsy Cline]

I'm feeling empty and unmotivated. One half of my brain wants to do all these things, the other half could care less. Guess which one my body decides to listen to. I feel like such a waste.

[Phoenix_1]

Originally Posted by swheaton

I lose my coffee and my glasses!

I'm feeling good today. I actually slept last night and have been pretty solid emotionally.

I lost my coffee this morning. I looked everywhere. In the cupboards, in the fridge, in the living room and bathroom and bedroom, but I couldn't find it. How can I lose a cup of coffee in a one bedroom apartment? I finally found it in the microwave. Duh....

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[Hbomb0903]

My sons are my motivation for now. I find myself ruminating on how I don't give a crap about anything or anyone, but I do care about them and their well-being even if I feel guilty for not contributing to it as much as I "should".

I also remember that when I come out of these depressions, I can't even really relate to how I felt in them...which is a blessing. Hoping that it happens soon.

[ManicIcarus]

I'm feeling a wee bit on the up side. It started this morning and is probably the reason I actually registered for the forums here. Now if I could just manage to put this excess energy to something productive.

[x_BabyG_x]

Happy World Bipolar day everyone! Keep strong xoxo

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[Victoria'smom]

I'm so ******.

Originally Posted by Phoenix_1

I lost my coffee this morning. I looked everywhere. In the cupboards, in the fridge, in the living room and bathroom and bedroom, but I couldn't find it. How can I lose a cup of coffee in a one bedroom apartment? I finally found it in the microwave. Duh....

Thanks, Phoenix, I literally burst out laughing reading this. Because that is SOOOO me as well! I'm pretty well trained to keep things (like socks, light bulbs etc) in the same specific place all the time (as one of my compensation strategies) or it would be hopeless. BUT for things that travel around, yikes. I am notorious for losing things and putting them in very strange places. One time, my BF played a little joke. We were watching a dvd. I'd gotten a bowl of ice cream, then briefly did something else. Returning… where's my ice cream? Searched all along the path, everywhere. Started to think I'd only imagined getting it and that it never really happened(!!) Got really wound up that I must really be losing it. While out of the room, BF put it right on the bed (doubles as our "couch") in plain sight. WTH??!!! How could I have not seen that???!!!! He laughed and admitted he'd put it up on the shelf in the closet, just for the amusement. It was kind of funny. If we didn't laugh, we'd cry.

Originally Posted by x_BabyG_x

Happy World Bipolar day everyone!

To you and all as well! First one even. 76 organizations. Wow.
(It was so striking and sad to note the massive gap in Asia and a good deal west of there, though. I'd like to think that being a new event, it might simply have been a matter of not enough timely communication. But that would be wishful thinking. I can't imagine the isolation BPers must feel there….
I'd LOVE to be wrong, and corrected on that, so if anyone knows….do tell!)

BF's MRI went alright, but it really made his head hurt (all the noise). We should find out in a day or two if anything's up.

[Curiosity77]

I did almost nothing all weekend, which was great. I just got home from running on the seawall. Now I'm back for an evening of netflix and hanging out with my cat. My mood is OK, not great but not terrible either. My goal for this week is to exercise at least 3 times. I know I'm feeling better because I'm starting to want to be physically active again. Hopefully I can keep the motivation to stick to my goal.

[charo224488]

Originally Posted by Hbomb0903

Why are you getting off them?

I don't know. I guess I look at xanax as a really bad crutch, and myself as an addict, and so I'm always thinking about stopping it. I've taken it for most of the past 25 years. I can't sleep without it. I have horrible panic attacks without it. But, I don't want to need it. I know people have said that it takes years to get off of it, but I have no patience. I quit smoking cold turkey, first try. That's just how I am, it's not better or worse than anyone else it's just how I have to do everything. This xanax thing though, I can't do it. I don't like to say those words. I'm very conflicted about the whole thing.

[Hbomb0903]

Originally Posted by charo224488

I don't know. I guess I look at xanax as a really bad crutch, and myself as an addict, and so I'm always thinking about stopping it. I've taken it for most of the past 25 years. I can't sleep without it. I have horrible panic attacks without it. But, I don't want to need it. I know people have said that it takes years to get off of it, but I have no patience. I quit smoking cold turkey, first try. That's just how I am, it's not better or worse than anyone else it's just how I have to do everything. This xanax thing though, I can't do it. I don't like to say those words. I'm very conflicted about the whole thing.

Well it is VERY dangerous to quit benzos if you are so dependent, so please be careful. And don't be so hard on yourself. Who is judging you but yourself??

[Roblovescats]

So this is a good description of how I am ... Wife asked me Today what I want to do on Tuesday. I said about what? She said ... For your birthday. I looked at her weird and said "is Tuesday my birthday?" Had no idea. I knew it was coming up but had no interest in it as it is never special to anyone. She never does anything for me like cake or gift and she doesn't ever take the kids to go get anything like a gift or card... Never has... Big surprise I forgot about it!!! I bought a pair of boots for myself back in February and she said "well that's going to be your birthday present"... And it pretty much will. Do I feel unneeded and unloved ... Uh ... I am! Poor pitiful me! Whatever I don't really care. Obviously considering I totally forgot about it.

Sent from the dark side of the moon

[x_BabyG_x]

Whilst we have a coffee theme going on here, if just like to report that I alllllmost put milk in the coffee jar instead of my coffee cup this morning. Almost ruined a full jar! I know some people may disagree, but No one needs that much coffee in the morning!

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[FaithlessCat]

Originally Posted by Roblovescats

I really have nothing on my mind. Oh except coffee! Where did I set it? Anyone else here lose their coffee like three times before they finish it? Just keep swimming just keep swimming.

Sent from the dark side of the moon

I stopped drinking coffee after my breakdown because it made my heart palpitations worse but i do keep forgetting to drink my rooibos and have to put it in the microwave to reheat it .... Then forget it again ... even thou it beeps every minute or so to remind me it's in there.

Lol ... i think I'm gonna be such a fun grandparent

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I actually made it out of bed in time to be at my new job this morning. I leave in about 15 minutes. Kind of nervous. I shall update later!

[Moreta]

I had a good weekend. I went to the Southeast District UUA Choir Festival. A bit too much social interaction though. Not used to it.

I am so tired this morning. I took some seroquel last night, so I would sleep. I guess that was a bad decision.

[tigersassy]

Called into work today. I couldn't pull myself together. I was hearing things. I haven't taken my morning dose of meds yet. I was supposed to take them 3 hours ago. But I went back to bed and wife was snuggled up to me. Going the day gets better.

Tig

[tigersassy]

Delete please double post

Tig

[Phoenix_1]

I got up before the alarm today. My daughter and 3 grandkids are coming today. I'm excited to see them - I haven't seen them since Christmas. They live 1200 km (750 miles) away. Yay!

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[shortandcute]

I woke up very depressed and in pain. I'm having coffee and that has helped a little. Yesterday, I managed to lead my very first depression/bipolar support group!

Well, the job orientation went fine. Then I went grocery shopping, walked the dogs and now am doing laundry. I feel it will be a long day because I do not have much else to do nor the motivation to seek something out (depression)

[chinatea]

Been depressed lately, lost my insurance, my grandpa and my pregnancy. Been calling a lot of helplines/crisis lines, finally went into the ER yesterday, and lied and weaseled my way out of being admitted. Husbands taking the whole week off from work...Now, I'm thinking not being admitted wasn't such a good idea...

[PoorPrincess]

Originally Posted by shortandcute

I woke up very depressed and in pain. I'm having coffee and that has helped a little. Yesterday, I managed to lead my very first depression/bipolar support group!

Congrats, shorthandcute., on getting the leadership together!
Kudos.

[PoorPrincess]

It was as always a brief night of sleep, 4-5 hours.
Too many months of this, I am feeling really ragged and good for nothing.