Ashamed of being bipolar.

I am not ashamed of myself or my disorder. If people do not accept me it is their ignorance and their problem. That is why they reject you because they fear what they do not know. The essence of Prejudice. Give them some education sbout the disorder.

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I agree with you, beepee, except for the part about educating people. On a 1:1 basis I've found people to become even more prejudiced. I think the national groups are doing a great job and should support them more than I do. I don't share my diagnosis with anyone because it's none of their business. There is so much support out there from people who understand (because they,too, live with MI) that I blow off the ones who don't and let them label me as eccentric instead of mentally ill. Seems most people like to stick labels on each other. I isolate because of it...I know I'm a bit off-putting in my ups or downs.

mental illness have such a stigma and people judge...only a few people know about my bi polar...

Today reminded me, I'm not only ashamed of my disorder, I'm also frequently ashamed of myself and my actions. I went to the dr. today and I'm manic. I tried to talk very little but he knows me, got me to start talking and I couldn't stop and just rambled about so many things that I shouldn't have said. I noticed him and the nurse looking at eachother like, 'oh my, she is nuts'. Then it hit me how crazy I must seem to him and others. I think I'm in the same league, friends even, with people who must just think I'm delusional and must sigh with relief when I leave. I am so ashamed. How can I go back? I have a FU in 2 wks b/c my new med is giving me a rash. I'm such an idiot.

sorry you feel like this also, like you I am also ashamed of myself, I don't know how to go about changing my mindset, I hate feeling like this, I hope your appointment goes ok.

I am newly diagnosed and working hard to accept my diagnosis and not be ashamed too. Just give yourself time and know that none of this is your fault Also, I'm sorry your so-called "friends" treated you that way. I am sure there are plenty of people out there that will be there for you and want to know the terrific person I'm sure you are. Hang in there

It does doesn't it? We wouldn't be ashamed if we were physically ill would we?

ITA. I was diagnosed in 2012 and it turned my world upside down. I did not have bipolar all my life I was a late bloomer. It took me by storm too. I had to process it all and I did it with therapy. I was pissed at my family too b/c mental illness ran in our family and they kept it a secret. I had to work through that in therapy too. I'm in a better place now b/c of therapy. I did lose friends, close friends along the way. Well ppl I "thought" were close friends. I thoughts of them as family but they left me and it hurt. But it did not kill me it made me stronger. I'm very careful on how I tell b/c ppl judge "EVEN" family.

I'm not ashamed of it, I just wish I could shut my mouth I am sure people would like and accept me more if when they ask how I am I didnt go off into full blown information about my Bipolar etc.

Every day I think ... right, I am just going to smile and answer politely, try to be calm and not over share .... every day its an epic fail and I end up regretting some conversation or other.

Are you currently in a (hypo)manic episode FC?

I always overshare when I'm hypo. Without fail. Everyone will know alllll about how much sleep I'm not getting or if I keep forgetting to eat or what I was doing on the weekend or if I was feeling ill and allll sorts of stuff.

And I now have 7 coworkers who all know of my diagnosis. 7! And I almost blurted it out to a few others but fortunately my flag of "no, not trustworthy!" came to mind so I didn't.

yep ...despite getting my levels of tegretol correct I have notice last few days def creep up of Hypomania, surviving on a lot less sleep, drinking more, onlining gaming more, spending money more etc etc. I seem to have better control thou. But Man I wish I could stop telling people my whole life story after only saying HI .I told my gym instructor about my Trich, and skin picking today ... FFS cat, keep your mouth shut ... nod and smile ... Arggh why can't I do this

I have been quite ashamed of my actions/habit of interrupting bosses when hypomanic. It has injured quite a few work relationships.
The hard thing is also fixing what was 'broken' relationship-wise.
It can be done though - I am doing it now ) :

Thanks guys,
I hope all of you are feeling ok.

Has anyone ever been on Brintellix? It's new in the US- but I think it's been used in other countries for years. I was started on it a few weeks ago and I'm wondering if anyone has any experience with it. Thanks.

I'm not ashamed as much of being bipolar as I am of what I want to do when I am manic. The things I think about.

~Sent from Dark Side of the Moon~

I'm bad about this as well. I've been in sort of a mixed episode lately, and one day when I was "up" I almost shot my mouth off to my co-workers about my BP. Now, there is not a single person at the state agency I work for who knows about my MI and I want to keep it that way, so I'm glad I was able to shut up before I blew it. But I worry about what could happen the next time I get hypo/manic for real and lose ALL my filters.

I am so pleased you guys have brought up the filters thing. I overshare too. I worry about it a lot, and ruminate on what I have said. I cant seem to control it. I get too scared to socialise with friends because the first thought in my head comes out my mouth and its not always correct nor something that should be said. I cant trust myself not to embarrass myself!

I can relate to what all of you are talking about. My diagnosis was relatively secret until a couple years ago. I got hospitalized, and it seemed like everyone I knew found out. It didn't help that I was posting a lot on Facebook, and I had no filters at the time. I had a lot of support during the hospitalization, but I lost a few close friends over the next few months when I was still pretty unstable and didn't get better quickly. Some of my relationships with family and friends survived, but the dynamic was forever different. Now I only talk about my symptoms to 2 friends who are also bipolar. Otherwise I try to always appear OK to everyone because I don't want people to view me differently. I wish I could be more open about it, but people do judge, unfortunately.

I don't tell because I got burned by my family: everything I did, said or felt was labelled part of my "sickness. I want to be judged by the same criteria as everyone else, not thru the lens of BP.

I was first diagnosed with bipolar. I had so much stigma and embarrassment about it. I cried and was in shock. Then I started reading and understanding it more and wasn't so fearful about it. Since then, I've been diagnosed with Schizoaffective bipolar type and PTSD (which I already knew). The word schizo in front caused stigma all over again, but I'm getting used to it. I just am careful who I tell.

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