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  #1  
Old Apr 11, 2014, 12:21 AM
grandmaof3 grandmaof3 is offline
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Over the last few years my problems have multiplied. I first started out with just mood swings between depressed and manic. The mania wasn't that bad at first. As years go by my manic episodes have become increasingly worse. Over the last two years I have started at first to have auditory hallucinations when manic and being up days on end, now I get visual hallucinations as well. I have also started losing time but I think that may be from my meds and Ill ask my pdoc about that. Has anyone else experienced increasingly worse symptoms over the years ?
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  #2  
Old Apr 11, 2014, 12:49 AM
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BipolaRNurse BipolaRNurse is offline
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Ohhh, yeah. I'm 55 and I never hallucinated until last summer during a manic episode (I don't have those during depression). I wasn't even sure I was bipolar until I was diagnosed two years ago, and have been fighting it tooth and nail ever since. In some people, the disorder mellows with age, but for me it's only gotten worse. So you have company.
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  #3  
Old Apr 11, 2014, 12:56 AM
grandmaof3 grandmaof3 is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by BipolaRNurse View Post
Ohhh, yeah. I'm 55 and I never hallucinated until last summer during a manic episode (I don't have those during depression). I wasn't even sure I was bipolar until I was diagnosed two years ago, and have been fighting it tooth and nail ever since. In some people, the disorder mellows with age, but for me it's only gotten worse. So you have company.
Thanks Im glad Im not the only one. Im going to be 48 next month and I never used to dread getting older but now I do. I wonder whats next !
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  #4  
Old Apr 11, 2014, 01:30 AM
Anonymous100125
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Yes! I'm truly frightened at how severe my symptoms have become. I'm 51. Until I was 50 I was more classically bipolar 2 ("good" hypomanias that were at least somewhat fun and productive, and very creative...terrible depressions, but they were quite treatable). Over the past year my depressions have become very deep and riddled with anxiety and agitation. The hypomanias are very negative and horribly unpleasant...also anxiety/agitation, fear that borders on or is delusional, irritability - and the mixed states are a constant. Meds that were remarkably helpful before are just so-so now. I'm really struggling with my mental state, more so than ever before in my life because before meds were very stabilizing. Most days, at some point, I feel desperate.
  #5  
Old Apr 11, 2014, 02:14 AM
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dragonfly2 dragonfly2 is offline
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I have heard that symptoms can worsen with age, especially during menopause. I'm only 43 and haven't reached perimenopause quite yet, but I am really dreading it. I had severe symptoms when I had my children, so I know that hormones have a huge effect on my bipolar.
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  #6  
Old Apr 11, 2014, 05:33 AM
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wildflowerchild25 wildflowerchild25 is offline
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I had a bad time as a teenager up until I was 20, but I believed it to be all trauma related. Once I had ECT and dealt with the trauma I believe I was cured because I didn't agree with the BP dx. I was good for awhile.

Suddenly 26 rolls around and I'm back to being suicidally depressed. Then, I experienced my first ever euphoric hypomania, that probably slid into manic territory for a couple of days when I believed I was a special healer. It's been rapid cycling she since, except when I take the proper dose of medicine.

Looking back, knowing what I now know and being more willing to see it, I can see I definitely had episodes all troughout this six years. They were just mild enough that I didn't see them for what they were. I mean I know I had depressions and I admitted that to myself back then, but now I can see te hypomania too. Knowing that it didn't stay happy for me for long and often devolved into anger and irritability.

As I'm only 27 I hope the symptoms will not get any more severe as life goes on. Right now I usually only have mania for a couple of days, which doesn't count for a DSM dx. Hopefully I won't ever qualify!
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  #7  
Old Apr 11, 2014, 06:20 AM
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Nammu Nammu is offline
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Over all for me it's better, I'm 55. But the antidepressants were the cause of my psychotic breaks and raging mania. I refused to take them about 10 years ago and improved considerably. Some of the anti psychotics I was on caused poly cystic problems and I had 1 and 1/2 of my ovaries removed that May be why I never had peri menopause but went straight to menopause after getting septic from an un diagnosed bladder infection. For some reason or another I had almost no problems with menopause and since then I have been relatively stable until my back surgery last year.

Most of my problems now are from the side effects of huge amounts of meds that I was on for years earlier. I'm young to have both osteoarthritis and severe bone loss, some of which might be from the medicines.
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  #8  
Old Apr 11, 2014, 07:16 AM
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Victoria'smom Victoria'smom is offline
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I'm 30 but my symptoms changed from euphoria to disphoria and mixed after my son.
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  #9  
Old Apr 11, 2014, 09:47 AM
Anonymous37807
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Originally Posted by dragonfly2 View Post
I have heard that symptoms can worsen with age, especially during menopause. I'm only 43 and haven't reached perimenopause quite yet, but I am really dreading it. I had severe symptoms when I had my children, so I know that hormones have a huge effect on my bipolar.
I'm 48 and in perimenopause. I really hope this severe depressive phase (worst of my life) is due to hormones. At least I would know there's an end in sight.
  #10  
Old Apr 11, 2014, 12:11 PM
Anonymous100104
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I've only been diagnosed for 8 years, I'm 51, but I notice it has gotten worse the older I get, my hypomanias are full of anxiety and always turn to mixed then drop to depressed, all with yhat horrible anxiety. I noticed this last mixed/depressed time coincided with me not having a period for 3 months. I'm in perimenopause. I'm almost certain my bp was triggered by the hormone change.
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  #11  
Old Apr 11, 2014, 01:45 PM
jack123 jack123 is offline
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Definitely worse. I am now treatment resistant.
  #12  
Old Apr 12, 2014, 10:53 AM
outlaw sammy outlaw sammy is offline
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Fourteen years ago, I was diagnosed BP1 while in an advanced state of manic-psychosis. With on-going treatment sessions, I asked my pdoc if the BP would get worse with age. He replied with absolute conviction "Yes." And all these years later, I totally agree with him that it definitely gets worse.
  #13  
Old Apr 12, 2014, 11:01 AM
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I am currently in the most severe depressive episode of my life and I was diagnosed in my early 20s (I'm 48 now.) My most severe manic episode was when I was in my late 20s (became delusional - - that doesn't happen to me anymore).

[I see that this is my second time responding in this thread. Poor memory!]

Last edited by Anonymous37807; Apr 12, 2014 at 01:45 PM.
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  #14  
Old Apr 12, 2014, 11:19 AM
grandmaof3 grandmaof3 is offline
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Im glad I am not the only one with worsening symptoms.
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  #15  
Old Apr 12, 2014, 12:55 PM
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For me some things gotten better (anxiety, and I guess even my depressive side is somewhat... better lately).

Soem things gotten worse (insomnia, manic side tends to me more intense, I am more irritable..... and I am sadder. Not more depressed... just... sadder in general).
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  #16  
Old Apr 12, 2014, 01:29 PM
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Okay... well... I'll jump in here. I'm a 65 year old male (sort of...). I've battled mental health problems my whole life. But I managed to keep my head above water for about the 1st 50+ years. Then I had a not all that serious bout with cancer. It's been downhill ever since. I always imagined that if I made it to old age, that my mental health problems would fade away. But, instead, they seem to be getting worse. Sometimes I begin to feel like I'm gradually slipping away to the point where, perhaps sooner rather than later, there'll be nothing left but my empty shell. Sometimes I start to think about ways in which I could hasten the process since the idea of just being gone, mentally, has a certain appeal.
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  #17  
Old Apr 12, 2014, 04:08 PM
gypsy pink gypsy pink is offline
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I have had stages where I have been incredibly happy creative manic plunging down into the deep depression. In the past few years the manic part has slowed way way down but the depression and anxiety seems to have increased. I am on lamactil and generic xanax now, thinking about going back on wellbutrin.
  #18  
Old Apr 12, 2014, 05:13 PM
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littlemiss44 littlemiss44 is offline
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I have noticed that the older I get the worse my symptoms get too. I'm not quite in perimenopause but I know I'm close. A week before my cycle im a complete wreck. It's like my meds don't do ****. I rarely get hypo and I believe that's because I'm well medicated but my depression is almost always there. I can't seem to shake it. My social phobia is always there. My motivation to do anything is debilitating. I can't seem to get anything done. I don't like to get together with people. I have a friend who wants to come by for a visit next week and I really don't want to. I love her but I just don't care to socialize anymore. So in short I believe mi gets worse with age. I was diagnosed in 2004 when I was 34.

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  #19  
Old Apr 12, 2014, 05:18 PM
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Worse, yes. More entrenched and the lows got even lower (like serious depression for nearly a year sort of thing). Panic attacks appeared too. I don't remember (non-situational) panic like that when younger. Wanting to crawl out of skin agitation, don't really remember that happening as much when younger.

Finally getting on meds a few years ago has helped. Not perfect, but better for sure. But I'd have to say the worst thing was the appearance of mixed. I'd never been scared of my symptoms before (and no, not even sui). Embarrassed, amused, mortified, annoyed, regretful etc. yes, but not personally scared of. (By mixed, we're not talking about emotions getting bounced around to extremes or even shifts exasperatingly frequent (I've read people talk about it this way, experienced those things, and yeah, those suck, but...) We are talking about mixed as in extremes happening simultaneously on and on and on. It was a hell I could not have possibly imagined in my wildest nightmares.

For nearly 30 years that had never happened. Not on anything approaching that intensity/scale/duration.

I can't think of a single thing that has mellowed out or disappeared (edited to add, oh yes, rage. I still have it, but not wildly inappropriate as often). At least now I know what I'm dealing with. I didn't then. (So had mountains of guilt and self-reproach that I just didn't have enough self-control to pull it together).

(I lose time a lot too, grandmaof3. Time, words, orientation, what season it is, you name it. I don't know why either. Most bewildering is how much it varies. Some days I'm just a bit of a space cadet, other days…. yikes.)

Last edited by Anonymous45023; Apr 12, 2014 at 05:36 PM.
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  #20  
Old Apr 13, 2014, 03:26 PM
outlaw sammy outlaw sammy is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by littlemiss44 View Post
I have noticed that the older I get the worse my symptoms get too. I'm not quite in perimenopause but I know I'm close. A week before my cycle im a complete wreck. It's like my meds don't do ****. I rarely get hypo and I believe that's because I'm well medicated but my depression is almost always there. I can't seem to shake it. My social phobia is always there. My motivation to do anything is debilitating. I can't seem to get anything done. I don't like to get together with people. I have a friend who wants to come by for a visit next week and I really don't want to. I love her but I just don't care to socialize anymore. So in short I believe mi gets worse with age. I was diagnosed in 2004 when I was 34.

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OBVIOUSLY - I'm not a clinician, but I've got to say that your psychotropic regimen is out-of-order. You shouldn't be feeling like you do if you have the right or close-to-right mix of meds. Please get back to your pdoc and tell him/her that Outlaw Sammy says, "fix this problem!"
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  #21  
Old Apr 13, 2014, 03:31 PM
Anonymous100125
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Maybe this is why ECT is commonly used with older people...because many people become med treatment-resistant with age. *sigh*
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  #22  
Old Apr 13, 2014, 03:37 PM
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littlemiss44 littlemiss44 is offline
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Thx outlaw sammy! Yr words are encouraging. Yr right I should talk to my pdoc about it. I see him tomorrow. I had to go down on my geodon because of insurance troubles and I think that's a big reason for my state of mind. I want to go back up on it. We'll see what happens. Wish me luck!

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  #23  
Old Apr 13, 2014, 05:12 PM
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Originally Posted by Sister Rags View Post
Yes! I'm truly frightened at how severe my symptoms have become. I'm 51. Until I was 50 I was more classically bipolar 2 ("good" hypomanias that were at least somewhat fun and productive, and very creative...terrible depressions, but they were quite treatable). Over the past year my depressions have become very deep and riddled with anxiety and agitation. The hypomanias are very negative and horribly unpleasant...also anxiety/agitation, fear that borders on or is delusional...
This has been exactly the case for me. What parcipitated my last crash before being on disability was stress. This did not make sense to me. I have handled tremendous loads of stress on previous jobs that I had before this last one.
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  #24  
Old Apr 13, 2014, 07:13 PM
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I've thought about going the ECT route. It was recommended for me years ago. I don't know if it would do any good. I've read that it's not that beneficial for long-standing major depression. The thought does scare me a bit. I'm already screwed up enough as it is without adding more if something should go wrong. Also my wife would have a fit!

Last edited by Anonymous100305; Apr 13, 2014 at 07:14 PM. Reason: clarification of subject matter
  #25  
Old Apr 14, 2014, 11:41 AM
outlaw sammy outlaw sammy is offline
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Originally Posted by The Skeezyks View Post
I've thought about going the ECT route. It was recommended for me years ago. I don't know if it would do any good. I've read that it's not that beneficial for long-standing major depression. The thought does scare me a bit. I'm already screwed up enough as it is without adding more if something should go wrong. Also my wife would have a fit!
Remember the old adage: "no pain, no gain." And Nike says, "Just do it."
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