[babs92]

Hi Everyone

I have been pondering on this for a while. My husband won't read anything at all to do with Bipolar. I have a couple of excellent books but he feels he just knows me and the way I am is just "me". He says he doesn't need to read up on it all. Trouble is I think he could really do with getting a bit more knowledgeable about it to help him to cope with me better - we have had a lot of rows lately (mostly to do with our autistic son, but that's parr for the course when you have a child like ours!).

My husband has been the same with my son's diagnosis at age 3, he is now 10 - he just won't read anything at all on autism.

Maybe its just a male thing. My mother is more knowledgeable on it all and really takes the time to understand me and my son. I think he wants to bury his head in the sand (maybe a bit unfair but why should I have to cope with this illness on my own!). I want to "connect" with him. He is supportive but in his "own" way.

I have only been diagnosed for 7 months and I am still trying to come to terms with this disorder and working out my meds.

I would like to hear other stories on their partners reactions, support etc.

take care all

[jlove973]

I am going through a similar situation My boyfriend says that it's all about the meds and the company gains all this money from ppl being misdiagnosed with things, but don't really have it. I was diagnosed about 7 years ago and I just was in denial. I have been getting therapy. Ya right! For about 12-13 years maybe. Off topic sorry

My boyfriend refuses to look into my BiPolar. He said another great person misdiagnosed. He said everyone has issues just others deal with it better. Well duh!!!I have BiPolar amongst other Disorders and he doesn't think I need meds or any help. He said I just need to take control of my life and my emotions not let things get to me so easily. I have several books and Info from online and he just ignores that they are even on my coffee table. I always pray that one day he will pick them up and read them and see what my life is all about inside. Rather then seeing my shell outside. I somewhat think he is in denial as well. I can't even talk about it because he doesn't believe it. He has never seen me without my meds before and one day I feel like not taking them so he can see what's it's like for me on a day to day basis. I know how I am or how I was as of 3 years ago before my meds became some what stable. I think that we would have stayed friends and nothing more.
My daughter has ADHD & Depression and possibly ASPERGERS. I don't believe that, but the Dr is still looking into this Dx. I deal with that on a daily basis as well. He refuses to believe that to. Just because she is an honor roll student doesn't mean that she doesn't have these Dx it just means that her meds are some what stable and she works well Academically. It's Emotionally and Socially that she has problems. He says shes fine she doesn't need anything to help her she just needs to learn to control herself.
He has seen her on a lower dose of meds and he complained because she was bouncing off the walls and what's wrong with her. Her P at the time was trying to lower adjust her dose do to her depression and she had a bad experience.
So all and all my B/F is the same way as your husband doesn't want to know about the Dx. I feel that he doesn't want to learn about me.
Like I said maybe one day he will pick up a book and see what myself and my daughter go through on a regular basis. You are not alone. Men deal differently then woman they do eventually want to know. It's just the question of WHEN???

Great books here: The Bipolar Child and Understanding Girls With AD/HD. These both helped me a lot

Thank you for sharing your story and letting me share mine
Jlove

My husband initially went to a class for spouses that describes bp & how it affects one's life. He learrned a lot & he could see how much I improved on the meds. So much so that I think he forgot that I had bp & now thinks nothing of saying "go take another pill" if I'm upset about something or need to talk to him about what is bothering me.

He also forgot that I am still very sensitive to criticism even though I'm on meds that are helping me remain stable. He said a hurtful remark to me a few months ago & I ODed because of it. He SHOULD have a clue that I'm not "cured", that I need support & understanding from him.

So far, we're not even talking about the OD. We're just pretending it didn't happen which is not helping me to get over the bouts of depression I'm still getting. My meds have been adjusted & I'm back intherapy, but I need him to help me cope, too.--Suzy P.S. I have a friend whose son was diagnosed with bp after 3 suicide attempts while he was at college. His father just thinks the kid needs to "grow up" & take responsibility for his life. He doesn't believe in this mental illness stuff. His wife is handling it all on her own.

[PlanningtoLive]

My husband is bipolar as well, but thinks that because he doesn't take any meds, I shouldn't either. I thought that I would get support and understanding from him, but boy was I wrong!

He constantly criticizes when I take my meds and when sometimes I am a bit foggy about things, he says "take another pill".

So I can relate to what you are saying.

Mary Alice

[bizi]

My hubby doesn't get it.
Even after all of these years of living with me...He can't tell when I am getting manic..I have to be the one calling my pdoc and taking extra geodon...my friends are calling to check on me and he asks why?
UGGG!!!!
so between myslef, my family that live 1000 miles away and my closest friends here (2 of them)...I rely on their input...not his.
I get really resentful about this....after 12 years...is he ever going to get it?
I try to explain that I am not well and he looks at me...I am working..I am not in bed...
He doesn't get the fact that I forget to do things follow thru due to my head in a spin.....I talk to strangers and embarress myslef....In the past I have "hit on" his best friend and his old boss..he doesn't remember this. Currently, I am having small incidents...accidently broke a glass, did not judge clearance, accidently hurt my finger slammed it in a closing suitcase, nice chunk out of that...almost getting into a car accident,...always thinking that I am forgetting something...cause I usually am...writing down apppointment times with out names...oh I hate that...impulsive...already buying bags of stuff for christmas for next year....on sale of course...I can rationalize any purchase...WE have lots of debt..hubby says ever body has debt..don't worry, ...when I hallucinated the other night and told hubby about he told me that he hallucinated one time before...he did not get that was a sign of mania( it had been 7 years since I had a hallucination)....I could go on and on....
...
~sigh
great thread thanks
bizi