[Mrs. Mania]

Hello all! Hopped on here last night for the first time. I'm a 42 year old married mother of one. I'm also mom to 4 furbaby's who I love dearly and help me cope more than anyone else. I was first diagnosed with major depressive disorder after my first suicide attempt at 16. Then generalized anxiety disorder was added, then social anxiety, then manic depression and finally ptsd. I am currently being treated for bipolar and having a real problem with managing my life while having this. I recently lost my job, health insurance, doc and as of tomorrow will be completely out of meds. I am scared out of my wits for myself and my family as I don't do well without meds. I have been a downer most of my life and am just now gaining an understanding of mania and its torturous ways. Crying a lot lately though and feeling alone. Due to many years in therapy I know when to reach out-so here I am.

[littlemiss44]

Even tho you won't have insurance there is a pharmacy online that has really cheap meds. It's called rxoutreach.com. all you need is yr pdoc to fax over yr scripts and I'm sure they'd be willing to fax them.over for you...even tho yr losing yr insurance. You can get 3 month supply or 6 month supply. For example I got my geodon which costs 350 normally and I got it for 30 bucks for a 3 month supply! There is help out there. Keep the faith hunny. So call yr pdoc and get them faxed asap. Register online first then get the fax number and you'll get them. I wish you luck. Hugs

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[gayleggg]

I can understand your worry about not having your meds. I don't do well without mine either. I hope you can find employment soon that will offer health insurance. I had to go with getting insurance through healthcare.gov, but it's not as cheap as I had hoped. Good luck to you.

[Victoria'smom]

Is there a way you can apply for emergency medicaid, go to county mental health, or urgent care to get your scripts. Print off all the coupons you can or ask county mental health for samples. It can't hurt to ask. If things get really bad please go to the ER.

Other than that welcome, nice to meet you.

[Mrs. Mania]

Thanks for the advice, I applied for Medicaid and FS yesterday. I owe my doc $250 so his help at this point is soemewhat mute. My original thought was going to urgent care for a 30day script, but don't have the $100 to be seen. $ is beyond tight, my stomach growls as I say this. Went to food bank but don't want to eat the food, saving it for my daughter as the pantry here only lets you come 3 times a year. Wish I woulda started above stated process earlier, but my troublesome super confidence assured me I would be back to work in no time.

[Victoria'smom]

Eat even if its an egg and coffee. You should have been told if you're accepted. Go to the ER for your script.

[Mrs. Mania]

Originally Posted by Miguel'smom

Eat even if its an egg and coffee. You should have been told if you're accepted. Go to the ER for your script.

Thank you so much for helping me pull through yesterday, it was a tough one! It can take up to 7days for DSS to approve you for an emergency application? & 30days for a regular one. I did eat, a 1/4 head of lettuce and 1/2 a carrot w/ dressing (the foods the kid doesn't like). I've got a serious fear of the ER in regards to mental health issues, fear of being committed &fear of seeing or being treated by past co-workers. I haven't seen anyone from the hospital since I got fired 6 weeks ago. How awkward would that be-ugh! Things are better today. My only friend brought me dominoes for lunch, I thought I would stuff myself- funny thing was,I couldn't! I piece of pizza and one molten lava cake and I felt like I had eaten a thanksgiving dinner! + the sugar overwhelmed my system to say the least. Then, while cleaning the house, I found a bag of depakote samples I got a while ago, didn't like them then,but maybe they will be better since they won't be combined with the other meds. I figure it's worth a try. Sorry for the ramble, just wanted to show my gratitude!

[Victoria'smom]

What were you on?

[Mrs. Mania]

Originally Posted by Miguel'smom

What were you on?

300 mgs lithium, 100 mgs lamictal, 40 mgs paxil. The depakotes 500 mgs, when I started them before I was to cut them in half for a week? So I took half and that's the plan, at least through the weekend. Monday starts a new week for things to come through-a job interview, unemployment, medical assistance. Trying hard to stay positive since today's turnaround.

[Victoria'smom]

Can you drive like an hour to a different er?

[Mrs. Mania]

Originally Posted by Miguel'smom

Can you drive like an hour to a different er?

While a different er solves the coworker issues, it does nothing about the fear of being kept + scripts aren't filled for free. Thanks to above threads I've learned about some programs that need looking into, but I doubt anything could happen over the weekend. I'm going to ride out the weekend w/ the depakote and make something happen Monday.

[Mrs. Mania]

I can't but.....you may win on the er trip. It's gotten so much worse. The paxil withdrawal is in full swing. I've been up all night, threw up my happy day pizza, nausea is sooooooo bad and overwhelming, dizziness......I planned on things being tough but man, this takes the cake, even for an ole veteran like me.

[littlemiss44]

Ouch!.those withdrawals are horrible.. try and drink lots of water and flush them otta yr body..and try to sleep it off too . I wish you weren't going thru this

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[sarahblue]

Do whatever you can to get on your meds! If it takes going to the ER, that's what it does. For your daughter's sake, if not for yours, you need to do whatever it takes to get well and stay well.

[sarahblue]

Mrs. Mania, how's it going?

[Mrs. Mania]

Hanging by a thread. While I'm grateful for the programs that exist to help with meds,I wish these programs were easier to navigate. I put way too much hope in Monday. Thanks to this site, life is controlled chaos which is better than regular chaos.....I think? Pounded the pavement in 90 degree weather looking for work with no results, thought about begging on the street corner which depressed me so much I started contemplating stepping out into traffic. Regained control and headed home where I sit now in tears. Taking every ounce of strength to believe it will get better.

[sarahblue]

Yeah, the filling out forms and all is a big pain, especially when you're not feeling all that great. I'm glad to know you're still moving, though! I hope things get better for you soon.

Hi Mrs. Mania, just want to say I'm pulling for a fellow 42 year old!!!

Hope you're doing better