guy pestering me with nosy questions

Ever since i had this guy over for a dinner date a year and a half ago he's started asking me nosy questions every time i see him. He broke it off with me so it's hard to see it as just idle chit-chat.

If he was sincerely interested in me, why did he break if off with me? Am i the center of his world? His questions are always so specific and intrusive. What was he -- taking notes? We were only alone together for a few hours and yet he seems to remember the most trivial things.

I so regret having him over. May i never again ask a guy out on a date. If you guys hear me considering it again, please remind me of how this debacle ended up.

Why do you think he does this -- with all the questions?

He just sounds like a socially inept person. I wouldn't give up on dating based on this one experience, but it sounds like you may want to steer clear of this particular man. Do you feel that you are in any danger when he is around, or does it seem relatively harmless?

Yeah, just avoid him. If he is creepy, take action with a restraining order. If he's just odd, discourage him strongly. Hopefully, he'll move on.

I don't think he is dangerous. I can't avoid him completely because we are in the same support group and that group means the world to me. It's been a year and a half that he's persisted with the nosy questions so i don't know how long it will take him to lose interest.

I think he's just trying to needle me. I don't know why. Maybe he is so unhappy he wants to spread it around? What a loser!

I'm sorry this is happening to you. Have you told him you don't want to talk to him again?

You need to turn into a cement block when it comes to him... Next time you see him say" I want to make this clear I have no desire to talk to you at all so stop it" Or some variation of that .. Just very blunt !

As far as him being in the same support group that is going to make it tricky .. He IS going to hear personal things about you.... Can you maybe change to another group? Yes, I agree if he doesn't back off and you are scared of him in any way, contact the police.

I hope he leaves you alone. Last time I had a guy pull that nonsense on me I sorta kinda punched him in the face and broke his nose when he didnt stop. He never bothered me again ... But I must say I don't promote violence like that in general.

I haven't actually told him that i don't want to talk to him. My doctor said just to give one word replies when he starts in and he'll get the hint. I guess i forgot to do this today. I'm tempted to email him but that would be a bad idea and i must resist.

Sorry to hear your trouble with that guy. Hope you don't think we are all like that. Wow, I can't believe I am going to say this, but can't judge an entire group by the acts of one. You may find someone you can spend time with. If you don't ask, that not going to happen.

Haha! Christina rocks! I know you all already agree! Lol

A good reason not to date anyone in your support group. Draw boundaries with him. Tell him that it is none of his business. Tell him that is questions make you uncomfortable.

Maybe your groups leader could talk to him. Maybe the leader could also inform him he is making your groups participation uncomfortable, and certainly the group has some rules. Maybe this is some guy with controlling issues. I agree with the others advice.

This whole thread is making me sad . I am usually the "creepy" guy who is trying to just talk and get to know somebody. I didn't know little questions about how you are doing can be considered controlling. I also didn't know that so many people would view this in this kind of way. When things like this happen to me i mean you did bring him over your house to hang out. Did you be blunt with him and tell him it wasnt romantic? Maybe he has little contact and interaction with the opposite sex.

I'm really tempted to email him telling him to leave me alone. I'm uncertain because i think writing notes is the coward's way out. I would like to be assertive enough to tell him face-to-face.

Also, i talked it over with my doctor and he said NOT to confront the guy in any way as that would just engage him. My doctor said just to discourage him with one word answers.

The problem is, it's been a year and a half and the guy is still persisting. It's not idle questions about how i am doing, it's inappropriate questions about my love life, finances and religion.

IDK... Should i just write him and tell him his questions make me uncomfortable and to leave me alone?

ohhhhhh, I would listen to your doctor. He most likely understands people like this better than we and you do. I bet he has patients who behave just like this guy.

I doubt you are acting the same as him he's just not picking up on normal social cues and the OP will make things clear to him .. Having Bipolar can be very lonely.. There is nothing wrong with reaching out for friendship and understanding. Personally I think Bipolar folks are able to connect with other Bipolars because we all know what its about.

So please get out there and find friends , were human and social creatures.

Cut yourself a break