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  #1  
Old Nov 03, 2014, 05:24 PM
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I feel dumb asking this, but now that I am trying to notice signals that my moods are shifting, and become aware of my change in perception, I thought I would ask. I feel like I am slowly slipping into a depression right now.

When baseline, I am quirky, but positive, a little bubbly, slightly socially awkward, and very smart but ditzy when it comes to common things like sports. I usually try to see the best in people and feel moderately liked by people around me.

Lately, especially this past week, I think people that I work with don't really like me. Like maybe they have to pretend to be nice because they work with me, but they don't actually like me. I *think* I have evidence for this, but I am not sure if my evidence is skewed by my mental state.

Does anyone else feel this way when depressed? What do you do to ground your thoughts? I don't want to feel unliked, but I do feel unliked. I am also tending to dissect everything I do right now and think that I pretty much suck at all aspects of my job. I hope this is not true, it feels like it though.

I guess I am trying to find out, when depressed, how do you gauge reality accurately?
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  #2  
Old Nov 03, 2014, 06:03 PM
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I get this kind of paranoia during my depressive phases a lot. I get it during my manic phases too, but usually then it's someone is out to get me.
Thanks for this!
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  #3  
Old Nov 03, 2014, 06:12 PM
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When I'm depressed I think that there is no purpose for my existence, I can't imagine why anyone would want Me around.
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  #4  
Old Nov 03, 2014, 06:42 PM
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completley understand where you are coming from. Have similar thoughts at times. Paranoia kicks in and I feel like no one cares or likes me. It typically happens when I am depressed, but as mentioned above I can feel that even when manic. I work through it by stating that this too shall pass. I make sure I do not act on my thoughts because that would be really bad.
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  #5  
Old Nov 03, 2014, 06:45 PM
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~Christina ~Christina is offline
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I think that Bipolar peeps in general over think things to death.. Paranoia typically comes with Depression and then Guilt pops up just for the fun of it

Bipolar or not ,people project their feels on others and then assume others feel the way we think they are feeling towards us.

Just go about your business and remind yourself that you need to increase your self care and try to not assume someones actions are directly a result of being around you.

I use self grounding when I am concerned that I am reading someones actions that are probably not the reality of the situation

Cut yourself a big break while your swamped with such an overflowing plate.
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  #6  
Old Nov 03, 2014, 08:10 PM
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Yeah it's your negative self talk because of your depression. It can cause me to have negative thoughts about myself and those around me and distort my perception of what others think of me. Rephrase. I distort in my mind that others don't like me. You're probably not as bubbly happy go lucky and people care enough to not interfere. Or they're unsure what to say.
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  #7  
Old Nov 03, 2014, 08:38 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by ~Christina View Post
I think that Bipolar peeps in general over think things to death.. Paranoia typically comes with Depression and then Guilt pops up just for the fun of it

Bipolar or not ,people project their feels on others and then assume others feel the way we think they are feeling towards us.

Just go about your business and remind yourself that you need to increase your self care and try to not assume someones actions are directly a result of being around you.

I use self grounding when I am concerned that I am reading someones actions that are probably not the reality of the situation

Cut yourself a big break while your swamped with such an overflowing plate.
Thanks...I didn't think about the projection thing. Maybe i don't like myself right now and I am projecting that. I appreciate the insight about the paranoia/guilt, too.
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  #8  
Old Nov 03, 2014, 08:41 PM
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Originally Posted by Hooligan View Post
Yeah it's your negative self talk because of your depression. It can cause me to have negative thoughts about myself and those around me and distort my perception of what others think of me. Rephrase. I distort in my mind that others don't like me. You're probably not as bubbly happy go lucky and people care enough to not interfere. Or they're unsure what to say.
Your right about the not as bubbly and happy thing. My demeanor has changed. Maybe I need to "fake it" and intentionally act well...that way I won't be creating barriers with my coworkers. Ugh...so hard to navigate this crap. Thanks for your help.
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  #9  
Old Nov 03, 2014, 10:13 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by middlepath View Post
Your right about the not as bubbly and happy thing. My demeanor has changed. Maybe I need to "fake it" and intentionally act well...that way I won't be creating barriers with my coworkers. Ugh...so hard to navigate this crap. Thanks for your help.
It's just as hard to fake it too at work. I've tried that before and it can be draining.
  #10  
Old Nov 03, 2014, 10:37 PM
Bi girl Bi girl is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by middlepath View Post
I feel dumb asking this, but now that I am trying to notice signals that my moods are shifting, and become aware of my change in perception, I thought I would ask. I feel like I am slowly slipping into a depression right now.

When baseline, I am quirky, but positive, a little bubbly, slightly socially awkward, and very smart but ditzy when it comes to common things like sports. I usually try to see the best in people and feel moderately liked by people around me.

Lately, especially this past week, I think people that I work with don't really like me. Like maybe they have to pretend to be nice because they work with me, but they don't actually like me. I *think* I have evidence for this, but I am not sure if my evidence is skewed by my mental state.

Does anyone else feel this way when depressed? What do you do to ground your thoughts? I don't want to feel unliked, but I do feel unliked. I am also tending to dissect everything I do right now and think that I pretty much suck at all aspects of my job. I hope this is not true, it feels like it though.

I guess I am trying to find out, when depressed, how do you gauge reality accurately?
I know people dont like me when I'm depressed. I'm so up & down all the time. If I'm not all bubbly they think I'm mad when I'm not. It sucks
  #11  
Old Nov 03, 2014, 10:39 PM
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Originally Posted by Bi girl View Post
I know people dont like me when I'm depressed. I'm so up & down all the time. If I'm not all bubbly they think I'm mad when I'm not. It sucks
I also think it makes me more depressed when I'm faking happy. So draining & I get so tired I just want to be alone.
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  #12  
Old Nov 04, 2014, 06:36 AM
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Originally Posted by Bi girl View Post
I also think it makes me more depressed when I'm faking happy. So draining & I get so tired I just want to be alone.
I almost always feel like that at the end of the day right now...Like i just want to be in a quiet room, with my computer or Tv, and have no interruptions.

I am going to try faking happy today...I am hoping i am not even MORE withdrawn tonight as a result. I guess its worth a try though
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  #13  
Old Nov 04, 2014, 08:24 AM
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Darvula Darvula is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Mamabug1981 View Post
I get this kind of paranoia during my depressive phases a lot. I get it during my manic phases too, but usually then it's someone is out to get me.
This is true of me too, but most of the time I don't care if people like me. The older I get, the more the people around me annoy me. I just think, #### them.

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  #14  
Old Nov 06, 2014, 09:38 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by middlepath View Post
I almost always feel like that at the end of the day right now...Like i just want to be in a quiet room, with my computer or Tv, and have no interruptions.

I am going to try faking happy today...I am hoping i am not even MORE withdrawn tonight as a result. I guess its worth a try though
I have found I am going into a deep depression the more I fake being happy. It's not working for me right now. At least I have the next 2 days off so I can see & talk to no one. I hate leaving mt apt.
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  #15  
Old Nov 07, 2014, 08:12 AM
Bipolarchic14 Bipolarchic14 is offline
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Ya I feel like I have to hide it when I am depressed. People annoy me when I am depressed too.
  #16  
Old Nov 07, 2014, 08:24 AM
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I've had people tell me they don't like me when I'm depressed. Which made me more depressed, of course.

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  #17  
Old Nov 07, 2014, 12:32 PM
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THE16THDOCTOR THE16THDOCTOR is offline
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Yes I've felt this way. What makes me shake out of it is to just think abt several things: it could just be all in my head I was feeling depressed and I may be reading too much into it. I create reason why they wouldn't like me either but I overthink it. Try to ground yourself and what would possibly be there reason. Everyone has something going on in there life it could just be they're self involved in their own things and you're the farthest thing from their mind. Also I've found it easier to think I can't control what others do or think so if they don't like me ok that sucks but kill it with kindness make your work environment pleasant. I've had the same thoughts that I'll obsess over its hard to shake when your in that state. I get it. I overthink and that's my worst enemy idk if that's you too. I know it's hard to bury it so no one notices.
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  #18  
Old Nov 07, 2014, 03:59 PM
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Yeah but my actions in high school still hang over my head. Many in my small town still remember me getting into fights there. I can't blame people not liking me and know some surely do not. So there are places I avoid in order not to feel unwanted.
  #19  
Old Nov 07, 2014, 04:17 PM
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middlepath, if I may summarize your thread:

- there is paranoia
- there is a danger of a self-fulfilling prophecy

Paranoia makes you think that people do not like you whereas that is not true.

Your demeanor, manner of speech, posture, and the rest are negatively affected by the low mood and cause people to stay away, which does not mean that they dislike you - maybe, as Hooligan pointed out, they simply do not know what to say. But their backing off is real. It is not your perception - it is real.

Then your realistic perception feeds into your unrealistic paranoia, the paranoia intensifies the depression and your facial expression might change, sending signals that people around you should continue to stay away.

Then a vicious circle and a self-fulling prophecy - the whole nine yards.
  #20  
Old Nov 07, 2014, 04:30 PM
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I don't like myself when depressed........... why should others like me?
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  #21  
Old Nov 07, 2014, 07:33 PM
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I feel like my niece doesn't like me as much when I'm depressed. She refers to me as being "cool" when I'm manic.
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  #22  
Old Nov 13, 2014, 06:03 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by hamster-bamster View Post
middlepath, if I may summarize your thread:

- there is paranoia
- there is a danger of a self-fulfilling prophecy

Paranoia makes you think that people do not like you whereas that is not true.

Your demeanor, manner of speech, posture, and the rest are negatively affected by the low mood and cause people to stay away, which does not mean that they dislike you - maybe, as Hooligan pointed out, they simply do not know what to say. But their backing off is real. It is not your perception - it is real.

Then your realistic perception feeds into your unrealistic paranoia, the paranoia intensifies the depression and your facial expression might change, sending signals that people around you should continue to stay away.

Then a vicious circle and a self-fulling prophecy - the whole nine yards.
I never even thought about my facial expression changing. wow. that's interesting and I bet it does! I can "see" it in someone else's face when they are depressed, so it stands to reason, others could see it in mine! Thanks for pointing this out.
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  #23  
Old Nov 14, 2014, 01:59 PM
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When I am depressed (especially during a crash), my family doesn't like me, im a burden to my job, I make plans to move out...I don't understand why I try to distance myself from the people who keep me sane.
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  #24  
Old Nov 14, 2014, 05:29 PM
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I feel that people do act more negatively towards you when depressive, maybe not intentionally but you see and feel them being cold, harsh, ignoring, leaving you out, avoiding you.. Smile and the world smiles with you. Cry and your on your own. People naturally are drawn to others who are relaxed, extrovert, bubbly, confident, talkative, up beat. Positivity attracts positivity and negativity attracts negativity. Its not choice that people suffer with depression but there are negative effects of that on you and others. Communication is 80%non verbal, body language.
  #25  
Old Nov 14, 2014, 06:25 PM
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Do we over think things,, what do you mean by that,, is it good or bad , do they care or maybe not, is it ok or maybe not, why am I thinking this way,, maybe I should think a different way,, but maybe not,, I'll think about it....
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