What is going on with my brain?!

I decided,probably against my better judgment, to stop taking my zyprexa. When I upped my dose like my pdoc told me to, my brain seemed to go ****ing bananas. All of a sudden, I was hyper with pressured speech and that *******ed floaty feeling that confuses me so much came back. I took my meds as directed the next night and yesterday I was a total mixed bag of bananas, laughing at nothing, crying at everything and wildly anxious. So last night, I quit the zyprexa. I had nightmares all night but woke up feeling OK. Nowwww, I feel like my brain is short circuiting and I'm shakey and floating again.
I can't figure out if the meds are causing this or if I was already barreling towards this on my own and they were somewhat keeping it at bay?
I'm new to all of this, and I'm incredibly confused, terrified and OVER IT.

Hi there furious,

It could take a while before your mood stabilises with the meds.

It's hard to be patient when we just want to be well.

But hang in there.

I'm sorry to hear that you're a bit all over the place right now.

Hopefully this will resolve for you soon.

Take care.

like the lady said it takes time for stuff to get to lvls

u have 2 choices
1 to keep doing what u are doing and ride it out until the meds do the job
2 go to the er check yourself in for a few days and have them tweak meds and get u on a solid program (this is the quickest way but it also means u are out of contact with ppl for 5 to 10 days )

if it is getting crazy for yah and bad crazy then call your Pdoc up and tell them u are checking in hospital have your treatment records sent over .....the team of quacks will get u on stable ground as soon as they can

I guess waiting is the best thing for me. I'm (luckily)super good at functioning in extreme distress. I feel like us bipolar folk become that way, like super adaptable? Maybe its the years of pretending nothing is wrong that most of us do or at least that I did. Anyway. I'm just gonna grip the guard rails until it settles. I feel like I'm on the upswing?
Who knows.

Do you respond the same way towards antidepressants?

Antidepressants make me instantly manic. Super low doses and within hours

Talk to your pdoc and tell them what happened. They may have more insight on both a quick fix (to make you feel normal) and a better long term solution.

I wouldn't necessarily blame it on the meds, I've had those feelings sans medication. But it could be the medication. Definitely see if your pdoc can help you sort it out.

I'm always afraid to call pdoc at first, but once I do they help me through whatever is happening and have insight about the medicines and bp that I could never have.

Get the experts to help you out for sure. Your Pdoc is your first call. Don't worry about the way you sound, or leave it till you feel ok. You need to be safe and you need that straight away. Take yourself to the ER if you feel you can't wait to see or talk to your Pdoc.

It's never an easy road getting stabilized as I am sure you are aware. Hang in there, be patient, practice your relaxation and well being tools (mindfullness, relaxation, slow breathing etc) and get some help asap.

Please keep us informed so that we can support you the best we can along the way