[BastetsMuse]

I've been what my pdoc called 'balanced' on my meds for a couple of years now, although I'm not sure I agree. I find it hard to do anything. I think I'm balanced on the side of depression -- it is amazingly hard to do basic things like bathe daily, brush my teeth, clean my house UNLESS there is a specific purpose or place to go or a person is coming to the apartment (hubby works and I am on disability).

I mean, do I settle for this sort of blah existence? Are pdocs so afraid of mania that they put us into this kind of emotional place, or am I just lazy? I mean, bills get paid, dogs get fed, but I just exist.... even the computer doesn't thrill me anymore. On the other hand, I have panic attacks when I go out to run errands and it's really difficult to be social.

Does this make sense to anyone? Have you been where I am -- not exactly depressed, not exactly NOT depressed? What did you do?

[sorand0m]

What meds are you currently on, out of interest?

[BastetsMuse]

Originally Posted by sorand0m

What meds are you currently on, out of interest?

Geodon 180 mg
Topamax 300 mg
Prozac 40 mg
Synthroid 150 mcg
Cytomel 25 mcg
Klonopin 1 mg prn
Adderall 20 mg q4 hrs

Bipolar 1, ADD, PTSD, Anxiety Disorder

[HALLIEBETH87]

Has your thyroid been checked recently? When mines off bslance I feel so awful I can't function

[BastetsMuse]

I just had my thyroid removed and we're medicating for that. This "blah" thing has lasted over a year, with short breaks from it. Still, it could be thyroid and I will be asking my endocrinologist about this in follow-up as well as my pdoc.

I just wanted to know if anyone else had experienced the "I'm not feeling depressed but can't DO anything" state.....

[BipolaRNurse]

Yup, that's about where I'm at since my depression lifted in January. I feel good, not at all symptomatic except for those two weeks that I was pre-hypomanic, but I don't feel like doing anything. I'm content just to stay at home, reading or working on the computer, and I still don't shower very often or do much housework. Not sure what's going on but I know it's not my thyroid---I've had the whole battery of thyroid tests recently, and they are all completely normal. I suspect I may be on a wee bit too much medication but I wasn't stable on what I was taking before I was hospitalized, so I'm reluctant to mess with the formula.

[Chuds]

Muse, I know what you mean about being balanced on my meds, but still feeling like crap. I have been on antidepressants for 12 years. During that time, I had some decent jobs, got a master's degree. But it all went downhill. I was just homeless last year. I fell really far, all on being "balanced" on my antidepressants and antipsychotic. I took stock of my 12 years that is past week (long story) and those darned pills did not buffer me whatsoever. I am (was) also on 60mgs of the Prozac and 80mgs of the Geodon. Good luck! It helps to have a good, caring, and supportive therapist who can offer some insight.

[Row Jimmy]

I think the meds affect each person differently. I take Depakote and it makes me forgetful and sort of lazy relative to things like going to the gym. I'm also tired on a regular basis and crap out at 9 on occasion. But I just try to stay mindful and motivated to do things that work for me. IMO, everything is a balance - the meds and the lifestyle. The meds are supposed to help me remain "mellow" or "centered" but right now, I'm listening to "Let There Be Rock" by ACDC.......it isn't exactly a *centering* song! I just go with what I think works in combo.

I could have written this. Feel exactly the same. Just Blah existance. I believe it is the meds - I am on Geodon too. It has been a great med for 5 years but I think its time for me to get off it.

I no longer have panic attacks about going out and being social but it does bring on anxiety and I find it extremely tiring. If I have a full on few days, then I crash few days in pain/illness/depression or something. Makes me worried to go back to work and study.