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#1
Jun 04, 2015, 11:49 AM
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Its crazy how I felt like taking my own life yesterday..and today I feel lonely. I wish there was a medicine out there that would let me enjoy being alive. That would stop the rapid thoughts..the worry..the depression..I just cannot enjoy anything. U know what makes me temporarily happy..vicodin..have not taken since last years surgery..but it gives me lots of energy and almost euphoric..and weed..weed calms me down..it makes living bearable..and neither vicodin nor weed give me any side effects..unlike all the meds I have tried..seroquel..lamotrigine..depekote.ability.geodon.effexor.wellbutrin.Zoloft.ativan.nuerotin.invega..I got another Dr appt next week..I'm just going to tell her I take what she prescribed last time..cuz I think I give up..its just crazy that nothing works for me..so many ppl say stuff works.
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Bipolar 1 Borderline Personality Disorder Generalized Anxiety Disprder *no meds currently 
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 ~Christina
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#2
Jun 04, 2015, 01:20 PM
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I'm sorry you are having such a hard time right now. I have been through the routine of many meds. Some not working at all and some only working for a short period of time. Right now I'm stable but just barely. So I understand the frustration.
I can only encourage you to continue to hold on. You never know how much difference a day can make. Sent from my iPad using Tapatalk
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Bipolar I, Depression, GAD Meds: Zoloft, Zyprexa, Ritalin "Each morning we are born again. What we do today is what matters most." -Buddha  |
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#3
Jun 04, 2015, 01:31 PM
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Don't be drawn in to the Vicodin scene. Opiates a very addictive and very dangerous. Before you know it you will need something stronger like Percocet or OxyContin and then you're in the clutches of addiction on top of your mental illness. And that **** will kill you. Killed my husband who had almost a year clean. He went to do his normal dose and it killed him. I am devastated now. You may not care if you're dead but I guarantee you have friends or family who will. So don't go with the opiates. Weed whatever.
Anyway I'd encourage you to hang in there. It takes years sometimes to find the right med combo but people have found it and ended up stable for awhile. I was stable until my husband's death. It is possible.
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Of course it is happening inside your head. But why on earth should that mean that it is not real? -Albus Dumbledore That’s life. If nothing else, that is life. It’s real. Sometimes it f—-ing hurts. But it’s sort of all we have. -Garden State |
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#4
Jun 04, 2015, 01:40 PM
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Thank you stranger..I was hoping to get some replies..I wish there was a med that would let me enjoy being alive and feel happy..without sending me to the ER. I have not talked or seen anyone in six days. No one wants to b around me..not even me..I have not seen anyone in six days..I think about killing myself..its just..there is nothing for me to live for..all day I been thinking about the best way to end this misery..I just gotta get up the strength to do it.
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Bipolar 1 Borderline Personality Disorder Generalized Anxiety Disprder *no meds currently
Last edited by TheWell; Jun 04, 2015 at 07:07 PM. Reason: Edited to bring whithin guidelines |
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#5
Jun 04, 2015, 01:47 PM
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And I been trying the meds for over two years with no success
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Bipolar 1 Borderline Personality Disorder Generalized Anxiety Disprder *no meds currently
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#6
Jun 04, 2015, 02:23 PM
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Hey, irritable4life. **If you believe you might commit suicide, call 911 immediately** Personally, I've spent days contemplating suicide, but I've known that I wouldn't actually go through with it at that time for various reasons. Only you can say, only you know your mind. But when you threaten to kill yourself in a public way, the responsible thing for others to do is take you at face value. Unfortunately, in an anonymous forum, there aren't many options for those reading your posts. But, please, If you believe you are going to kill yourself, call 911 immediately and get help.
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