[tamcat]

When I spent three weeks in a psychiatric facility last year, roughly 90% of us who were there with bipolar diagnosis, were having extramarital relationships. Since then, it is something I have seen more and more. How many of you guys have or had affairs, and mostly, who had a breakdown at the height of an affair? Lastly, what is your gender? Just want to see for interest sake...

[Victoria'smom]

I've never had an affair but we have added or subtracted partners throughout the years. for us emotional affairs are worse because sex is just sex. I'm female my extra partners are also female. As for as cheating I don't see that happening we're both bipolar.

[lunaticfringe]

I had a long term affair with someone I am still in love with though the affair is over...I'm not getting my needs met in my current relationship and I worry that I may cheat again.

Not really affairs, just sex. More of a "friends with benefits" thing, with a few people. No breakdowns at the height of an affair. All of it was very casual and for fun. I'm female.

[raspberrytorte]

I've never had an affair. I'm female.

[vjdragonfly]

I've had an affair and I regret it every day and I'm female. It haunts my mind and I hate myself for it. I believe I was in a mixed state when it happened and the person used it to his advantage (I was having major marriage issues) and not yet diagnosed bipolar.

[tipper1492]

90% is indeed the right answer. Search Google - bipolar marriages and divorce rate, and the answer there is 90%. I guess it's little wonder why it is so high.

[wiretwister]

no affairs ... male

[~Christina]

I have never had an affair. Never will happen, My first husband cheated on me. It almost destoryed me. I could never inflict that kind of pain on someone.

[BlackSheep79]

Never had an affair, I'm female. I've never experienced that what is it called hyper-sexuality? You always see it as a symptom, but not me.

[99 FAIRIES]

I had an emotional Affair. My husband was nothing but forgiving. I don't deserve him.

[Victoria'smom]

My husband had an emotional affair, he still doesn't see it, but as long as he never speaks to her again me and him are fine.

[Momofthree0317]

I can't seem to stay interested enough for more than a year with any guy who's stable and appears good for me and my kids. I always feel like something is wrong with me because of it, too. I'm going thru it now, actually and it's driving me crazy. I cheated for 5 out of the 10 years of my marriage and I still don't know the reasons...I feel your pain!

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[Raindropvampire]

Female age 39 bipolar. Never had or would have an affair. After watching my mom cheat on my dad for years(she's bipolar) I saw that cheating doesn't fix what's wrong it just adds to the problems. So I've always been honest and if my needs aren't being met I address it with my partner and fix the problem and I expect them to do the same.

I am so relieved to read so many who have never had an affair. It was one of my biggest fears, that I would go manic and cheat on my partner.

I have never cheated and never intend to, I hope I keep my moral standards through my mood states.

I definitely get hyper-sexual, but luckily we handle that fine, and I have no need to seek out others.

[pamela411]

Originally Posted by vjdragonfly

I've had an affair and I regret it every day and I'm female. It haunts my mind and I hate myself for it. I believe I was in a mixed state when it happened and the person used it to his advantage (I was having major marriage issues) and not yet diagnosed bipolar.

Me too, i was completely manic at the time and didn't really realise how wrong my behaviour was! its kinda ruined my marriage, husband does want to stick it out for the sake of the kids but he will never forgive me and keeps torturing me over the affair. I went straight in to a severe depression after the manic phase and I'm at rock bottom at the moment

[pamela411]

I don't know why i had an affair either!, thats the worst part of it, when my husband keeps bringing it up and asking "why?" i don't have a clue! sometimes i feel like i should avoid all human interactions as i seem to mess everyone up

[pamela411]

im a 38 year old female. Have always been against affairs but during my last manic ended up having an affair. I did try to tell my husband my emotional needs were not being met and i was desperate for attention but because he's probably used to me sounding desperate and needy he probably didn't take me seriously.
Having fallen back down in to a severe depression i now deeply regret the affair and don't understand why i let myself do it. My husband doesn't really forgive me and is just staying around for the kids. My life is a mess and I've brought it all on myself!
Now i have to deal with not just him torturing me about the affair but my mind convincing me i am a bad person now.

This illness is very lonely and isolating, its the worst part of it that no one really understands.

[lunaticfringe]

Originally Posted by pamela411

im a 38 year old female. Have always been against affairs but during my last manic ended up having an affair. I did try to tell my husband my emotional needs were not being met and i was desperate for attention but because he's probably used to me sounding desperate and needy he probably didn't take me seriously.
Having fallen back down in to a severe depression i now deeply regret the affair and don't understand why i let myself do it. My husband doesn't really forgive me and is just staying around for the kids. My life is a mess and I've brought it all on myself!
Now i have to deal with not just him torturing me about the affair but my mind convincing me i am a bad person now.

This illness is very lonely and isolating, its the worst part of it that no one really understands.

No one understands except for all of us. But yes I've found that no matter how hard you try to explain yourself to a regular person, they can never understand... yes it is very isolating.

[Momofthree0317]

Originally Posted by pamela411

Me too, i was completely manic at the time and didn't really realise how wrong my behaviour was! its kinda ruined my marriage, husband does want to stick it out for the sake of the kids but he will never forgive me and keeps torturing me over the affair. I went straight in to a severe depression after the manic phase and I'm at rock bottom at the moment

I decided after a year of trying to stay 100% focused and committed to our marriage, that in order to forgive myself, I had to leave him. He was making me pay for my mistakes that were eating me up anyway...with little jabs every day. I've been seperated/divorced for almost 3 years now. It has been a rocky ride, to say the least. I've been in a domestic relationship with my current bf for almost a year now, and I feel that little manic demon trying to come out once again. I don't know if I'll ever be able to stay in a committed relationship.

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[Momofthree0317]

Originally Posted by pamela411

im a 38 year old female. Have always been against affairs but during my last manic ended up having an affair. I did try to tell my husband my emotional needs were not being met and i was desperate for attention but because he's probably used to me sounding desperate and needy he probably didn't take me seriously.
Having fallen back down in to a severe depression i now deeply regret the affair and don't understand why i let myself do it. My husband doesn't really forgive me and is just staying around for the kids. My life is a mess and I've brought it all on myself!
Now i have to deal with not just him torturing me about the affair but my mind convincing me i am a bad person now.

This illness is very lonely and isolating, its the worst part of it that no one really understands.

I don't know about you, but I don't even understand myself. I sometimes feel like two people, one good and one bad. And I don't really know which one I'm "supposed" to be. Always feel like the decision I want to make is the wrong one. So I stay. Then I end up cheating.

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[Shadesofdark]

Been married 27 years. No affairs. Male.

[LettinG0]

Affairs.........flirting with affairs..........female......50, divorced, no interest any more

[Azvixxen]

Female - 43. Affairs - Ahhh...yes. Over and over and over. Some just emotional, some casual flirting, some strictly sexual, some sexual and emotional. I hate myself because I can't stop and yes, I am married. I get bored very easy, but in the beginning I am all about getting whoever is in my sites to be all about me. Then I get over it. I am basically a very very very horrible person and I would never want to be with someone like me.

My husband is trying to be understanding, but playing the injured party and unfortunately I don't care because my justification had been he cheated first years ago. But if I am honest, I have never ever been monogamous. I'm just...broken.

[tamcat]

Oh wow. I have read the statistics, but never realised that it is this real. I have been married for 13 years, and divorce was never an option. Now I have ended up having an affair, and we are getting divorced. It is killing me. Neither of us realised just how much our marriage was dying until it was too late. We are best friends, and I hate what I am doing to my wife.

I'm female