[Mehiguess]

Hello. I was recently diagnosed as bipolar with phsycotic features. Therapist was really pushing medicine on me. I was terrified but made my psychiatrist appointment and waited 2 months. Finally see him and get prescribed 20mg of celexa and 1mg respiradol. First night I didn't experience anything bad. I just got really tired and kinda dizzy. The next 3 days were hell. I was dizzy, tingly, slow, clumsy, felt dead inside, cold and hot, major panic attacks literally one after another, heart palpitations that woke me from sleep and lasted hours. It was hell. I was terrified. I had been wanting, needing, praying for some kind of help. Ended up at the er and passed out before they even got me a bed. Told me to stop everything and then see my phsyc. I did. Was told to continue with celexa and now start 50mg of seroquel. After that experice with respiradol, I'm so terrified of taking anything. I asked him if I could cut my pill in half and he laughed. My therapist said it wouldn't help my bipolar but could easy my anxiety and make taking meds easier. I didn't want to take anything. I didn't want to try again. But I see I need to be treated. But I am struggling. I took my celexa and had a panic attack a few hours later thinking I was having a reaction. I'm so scared of the seroquel bevause it can have similar affects to the respiradol. Im sensitive to medicine and I'm a very small, thin lady. But I feel like no one is listening and I don't think they realise how hard this is. I don't want to feel like that again. Am I being too childish? Am I right to be wary? Is starting so small pointless? I'm beside myself and all anyone can tell me is "take it! You'll be fine once the side effects go away!"

I don't want those side effects. I couldn't work. I couldnt function. All I could do was lay on the couch and cry and try to convince myself I wasn't dying.

[WibblyWobbly]

There's nothing wrong with cutting your seroquel in half. I always start on 25mg when I go back on seroquel, and it's enough to knock me out in the beginning. I'm sorry you had such a bad experience with risperdal. I haven't tried it but I've been on a few antipsychotics and they all felt completely different to me as far as side effects and efficacy. I'd be surprised if seroquel gives you panic attacks, it's very sedating.

[BeyondtheRainbow]

Med reactions happen. It's ok to be scared. I've been on at least 40 meds and had bad reactions to many of them (which is really unusual, don't be afraid of that) and what I've learned is that there is usually no way to predict what is going to happen. Risperdal and Seroquel are pretty different so hopefully you won't react. There is nothing wrong with slow increases. When I went on Seroquel I was really afraid of it because I'd had bad reactions to every anti-psychotic I had tried and so we did 25 mg increases every week or so. It took a long time to get to a dose that helped beyond making me sleep but I had no problems with it and have been on Seroquel for 7 years now, at very high doses for several years.

Going on meds is overwhelming at first and when you've had a bad experience it doesn't help but if you stick with it and get through the adjustment phases (and make sure you let your pdoc know when something seems wrong) you'll start to feel better.

I hope Seroquel works for you.

[Mehiguess]

Earlier today I was fine with idea of taking my medicine. I just worked myself up so much that I made it pretty impossible to do. I'm not so much worried about the general kinda crappy side effects you may get starting out with stuff. I just want to avoid ever feeling like that again. It took days for the palpitations to stop and for my anxiety to become "normal anxiety" again. It also made ma hallucinate a lot more. But honestly the kicker was my heart doing backflips and kicks and spins and whatever else it was trying to do. I don't hear a lot of people having a reaction like that so suddenly so I got pretty spooked. I just don't know how to make myself take the seroquel. I was working up to it all day and chickened out. I started at the bottle and felt like I was looking at my next heart attack. I dunno if that'll help with anxiety but I'm pretty high strung and have nothing except breathing excersises to quell it.

[neverending]

I also had a very bad reaction to respiradol. Ended up seeing my gp then in wheelchair then ip. I am now on an extremely low dose of seroquel. I cut my pills into fourths but it's working for me. I've been stable for a month now. See my pdoc today. But to cut the pills you have to be prescribed the regular seroquel not extended release.

[Homeira]

"Im sensitive to medicine and I'm a very small, thin lady. But I feel like no one is listening and I don't think they realise how hard this is. I don't want to feel like that again. Am I being too childish? Am I right to be wary? Is starting so small pointless? I'm beside myself and all anyone can tell me is "take it! You'll be fine once the side effects go away!"

I feel bad that you have to feel like this about something that is supposed to help you. And I think you have no reason to think that you are childish. You are taking your own health seriously by being a bit on the alert about how you start on these meds. They are after all quite strong. I am not going to give you any advice about the specific meds you take, since I have not had to take any of them. But I think you are rigth to question how and why your side-effects are so strong. It could mean that the dose is too high, or maybe you should have started on a lower dose. Or it could mean that your body is responding like this just in the beginning, and these side-effects are going to go away. But you have the rigth to have your questions answered in a respectful way. I think that sometimes there are no clear answers when it comes to treating mental illness with meds. Yes, we need drugs, some of us all the time, some of us just some of the time. But at the same time we need to question ourselves if the side-effects are so debilitating that they become part of the problem.
I think you will find your way in the (sometimes confusing) desitions you need to make in terms of how to manage your illness. Part of living well with an illness, is to ask just those questions you are asking. After all, you are the one living with it.

First of all 50mg of seroquel is a very low dose. It will help with the anxiety and psychosis to some degree. It is in fact a bipolar drug.

I wonder, are you eating properly? If I don't eat I have gotten dizzy and passed out a few times.

Finally remember that psych drugs take 4-6wks to take effect. There are numerous reactions one may have during the transition.

I am a proponent of psych medication as I know myself on and know myself off. The later isn't pleasant. But yes, I haad some unpleasant side effects for the first month or so.

[Mehiguess]

Update!

I took 25mg of seroquel and had an immediate reaction to it. Fell asleep an hour later and woke up every 15 minutes 3 hours later with intense and unstoppable palpitations. Same as the respiradol. I was told to stop taking everything. Again. I'm so angry with my body. I don't respond to antipsychotics well at all and I don't know why! I'm terrified to keep this game up. I was convinced earlier my doctors were trying to kill me. I see how ridiculous that is now but I'm really struggling.

[BeyondtheRainbow]

I don't respond well to APs either. I tried all that were on the market at the time (except the old ones) before we found that Seroquel worked. Don't give up hope, just keep trying and going slow and hopefully you'll find one that works with your chemistry. It can be a frustrating and picky process.

Have you had psychosis? If not maybe you need to try for more of a mood stabilizer like lamictal, depakote, trileptal, etc. Maybe you could tolerate those better.

There's always lithium which is different than anything else too.

I'm sorry it's so hard. I've been there (am there now) and I know it's so frustrating.

[Mehiguess]

My psychiatrist refuses to just treat my bipolar without giving me something for the hallucinations. I'm not sure why or if im asking wrong? But I asked to not be put on seroquel and he said I have to keep trying them. It felt really bad. He laughed when I asked to cut the 50mg tab in half. I dunno if I need a new doctor or what!

[Mehiguess]

Sorry I'm very disorganized with my posts so if something sounds funny just ask me to clarify. I'm up and down a lot and typing is hard.

[BeyondtheRainbow]

I understand why he wants to treat the hallucinations; that's not a fun symptom. But he shouldn't laugh at you.

When I tried trileptal it was sooooooooooo sedating and I was cutting it down to 1/32nd of a pill. My pdoc didn't laugh except to say I must be the best at use of a pill cutter in the world and then she said I was too sensitive to it and took me off it.

You've been on Risperdal and Seroquel right? So you still have Saphris, Zyprexa, Geodon, Invega (related to Risperdal), Abilify, Rexulti (brand new med that is a 2nd generation abilify), caraprazine (don't remember the brand name, it is REALLY new), and Latuda left of the atypicals. And some people do better on an older med. I know it is overwhelming to think of all those meds but hopefully you'll hit the right one soon. Abilify is less sedating and since that seems to maybe have been a problem perhaps that would be something to ask about? I didn't find Geodon excessively sedating although I think it did help me sleep at night (and it is weight neutral which is nice). Seroquel has some kind of cardiac side effect I know little about but maybe that is what you've had. I think Saphris has a similar effect but you'd have to ask to be sure and of course it would only matter if THAT side effect is the one you've had.

Keep advocating for yourself. There is nothing wrong with wanting to start meds slowly. Your dr should not have a problem with that. I've certainly done it numerous times and I'm on a few meds at low doses because I can't tolerate more but the tiny bit helps some; in contrast I'm on an enormous dose of Seroquel. So it's ok if they have to personalize your meds; that's what the dr is there for and why he is an expert.

If you don't think your pdoc is taking your seriously you may want to consider trying another. There is nothing wrong with that.

[Homeira]

Him laughing at you is unacceptable! Maybe you should look into finding a new doctor. When your psych. is making you feel bad about comepletely appropriate concerns (that you have), the psych. is part of the problem...

[Mehiguess]

Luckily for me my regular doctor is gonna be out of the office so I'm making an emergency appointment with someone else at that office and I am going to ask to switch immediately. I don't really feel safe with him anymore but it may just be paranoia. I feel like there are other options of treatment but he wouldn't discuss them with me. So I'll see what the new doctor says.

[BeyondtheRainbow]

You need to trust yourself. Don't automatically put things down to paranoia; that is you taking responsibility for this dr's actions and that's not your job. You need someone you feel comfortable with and trust or this process is so much harder. I was seeing a pdoc before I was diagnosed who kept loading on the SSRIs and not seeing the pattern that every time she did so I got manic and then crashed and was even more depressed. I figured out what was wrong with me myself and since then have been unbelievably fortunate with drs; first I did a clinical trial with a world's top expert and then I changed to the pdoc I've had for 13 years and she's amazing. Having someone good is really important.

[Mehiguess]

The whole situation has just gotten so bad for me. Bevause of these effects I've had to miss work and I've been fired because I wasn't able to get a doctors note for it. Now I can only afford two more appointments before I'm down to 0. I feel like this is it.

[BeyondtheRainbow]

That is really tough. I'm sorry. When you see the pdoc you can ask about what they can do to refer you to somewhere that won't charge you or will not charge much so you get continuing care.

[Mehiguess]

I was told I can ask the doctor to write me a letter for emergency medicaid so I can be helped right away but I'm not sure this is true.

I started on Seroquel at 25mg and was knocked out within 20 minutes. Worked my way up to 200 mg before deciding that the side effects of being a zombie were worse than the condition they were supposed to be treating, The XR was better, however had bad reactions to it so switched to Saphris. Am now off that and onto Olanzapine. Do NOT stay on a medication you are not happy with regarding side effects. There are a lot of others to try. The hard part is to keep trying them and not giving upl

Personally I think Pdocs have a dart wheel and use that for the drugs they prescrible. How you can get such different go to drugs with the one condition is beyond me. I have never had two Pdocs agree on my medications.

[Christopher1990]

you never know what may happen.. An antipsychotic named Novaine actually gave me hypothermia while IP. Im very med sensitive as well. I reccomend doing as much research as possible. Also note, sometimes medication can take a couple weeks to actually even you out like its supposed to.

Sent from my iPad using Tapatalk

[Mehiguess]

I know there is a waiting period for medicines to actually do what they're supposed to. I'm fine with that. I do also realize that there will be not so great side effects. I could handle being knocked out or feeling nauseated or dizzy. I just keep getting palpitations and since my blood pressure is already low, it makes me pass out or get very close to passing out several times a day. I'm not scared of unpleasnt stuff. I'm scared of damaging my heart from unnecessary strain. Will it come down to "handle the heart problems or hear and see things that aren't there" ?

[Mehiguess]

I'm looking too far forward and scaring myself. I'm really hopeful right now about medicine and I'm hoping i don't change my mind again. I'm cycling now more than ever and I need treatment before I decide to say screw this! And keep doing what I've been doing my whole life.

I'm sorry this all sounds like I'm venting but I guess I am. I appreciate everything everyone has said here. It means a lot that people are offering their experiences and success and failures with different things. And its nice to see that perservering is worth it. It's making this difficult time for me less lonely.

[Moreta]

Not to scare you or anything, but it took me 7 years to find the right medications. I have been on most meds out there, some 2 or 3 times. It's all about finding the right combo, which can take time. In the past 5 years I have been on the same ones, but I've had a couple added and dropped here and there. I'm currently on 6 psychiatric medications, but they keep me pretty stable, so I'm not going to mess with anything. There's a genetic test you can get to see which meds will work best for you, but I'm pretty sure medicaid doesn't cover it and I do believe it is pricey. Good luck.

[Homeira]

[Nammu]

Have you considered that it could be the AD, celexa? ADs cause panic attacks and anxiety in me, many BP people can't take them. I know the APs seem more dangerous but for me its the ADs. Have you asked about a mood stabilizer and an AP instead of the ADs.