[Victoria'smom]

I questioning how much help we really need from professionals. I'm not on meds, haven't been for almost a month. First it was by accident but it's become a "eh, I'll take it tomorrow." I'm on my shot but that's really it. I take the meds some days just not the lamictal. My husband is having the same problem. We're stable for now so therapy seems pointless right now. We see our pdoc in 11 days but I want to cancel until I'm back on medication. Which will take a month of consistent med taking. So I really need to decide meds or no meds for good.

We all know that bp cycles so both my husband and I will eventually become unstable. The problem is we feed off each other and tend not to get help when needed. So regular t appointments have kept us getting help earlier. Last thing we need is to need IP and not get the help because we wont. The problem is our center just lost 3 of 4 of their therapists in a two week period and the management is pushing to put me with my husband's T. Our thought is if he stops therapy that if one of us needs it she'll be neutral by that point.

In the past we've relied on our family to take care of my son when we have needed help. Recently it was made clear if he has school work he's not allowed to spend the night at family's house. So that means he's stuck with us through our worst.

I feel like we have a handle on things right now but bp's episodic. How do you determine what services you need? especially when you don't know when you need help and are on the severe side of bp?

[jacky8807]

Abilifye maintena may just keep you stable by itself and take that away then you may be in trouble.
If you say you are on the severe side of bp then clearly you know you need all the services they will give you. If you stay on top of it you may not have to worry where Miguel can go because you will be ok!
Good luck

Going off of your meds has NEVER worked well for you. You become incredibly unstable. This is your constant pattern. You know that and yet you keep doing this. Miguel deserves to have parents who are as stable as possible.

[Ocean Swimmer]

Why not keep T appts. Get a NAMI support group and take your Meds?
Bipolar is nothing to play around with, when you have your son and husband relying on you for help and care.
It's too big of a risk for you.
Hugs and Love

[Victoria'smom]

I'm hoping the abilify is enough to keep me stable.

Miguel deserves stable parents that aren't over medicated too.

The thing with t is that we want separate ones and they keep trying to force us to see the same t. Now they only have 1 t and that's my husbands. If he stops seeing that t I can go to her latter if need be. Hopefully by the time we need a t they'll have new t's to choose from. I don't think there's a point in seeing pdoc if I'm not on the meds correctly at the time. I wish you didn't havery to tyrate up on Lamictal. Pdoc can hospitalize me for non complies.

[Victoria'smom]

So Just do meds, therapy and pdoc.

[zijax]

I refuse to be over-medicated. Being under-medicated is better but I have to make some apologies to people later for my angry behaivior or anti-social. That is scary that a Dr. could put you ip for non-compliance. He's asking for lies. I like meds that let me be hypo-manic instead of manic. Lamictal made me Lamictish, spaced out, fat and moody. Iv'e been off and on meds in the past but i stay on them now bc I know bad things happen. I secretly wish I was off of them like you.It must feel good. Before the bottom drops out it's always good. But if I got so bad my kid couldn't stay with me I'd take meds. My kids come first

[Victoria'smom]

It can get so bad he can't stay with me just when I'm impulsive, angry, and having violent thoughts. I don't like him around when I'm short tempered. I haven't had violent thoughts towards others in over a month. I prefer him with family when we're both extremely depressed too. I would never get rid of the shot as it got rid of my ED. Even if I start meds today I'll only be at 100mg of lamictal by the appointment. So should I move the pdoc appointment out until I'm on 200mg?

[Disorder7]

I quit most of my meds. I take 10 mg of Paxil for panic attacks, and I'm down to 7.5 mg of Valium.
I am in therapy, and that's what I rely on the most.
The way I see it, most people still cycle even on meds. I know I did. Most antipsychotics are not much better than the ones they had in the 1950s.

In the past couple of months I've dropped about 10-15 pounds, my blood pressure and resting heart rate are great again. I'm physically healthier.

Now, when and if, they create a new med for bipolar that actually stops the cycling and doesn't have dangerous side effects, I'll look into it. But until then, the world will just have to deal with me the way I am.

[lilypup]

I am here to be supportive.
I have three kids I have raised (28,25,22) so I know something about BP and raising kids.
Your son can get really screwed up for life, especially if BOTH parents have MI.
Don't let this happen. He should be with you 95% of the time. Either you or your husband should take care of him, not family. One of you can pick up the slack when the other is bad.
This involves (to me) taking ALL medicines as prescribed, seeing a pdoc regularly (maybe every other week) and going to any and all T's they recommend. Get in a support group. Get aggressive and channel your energy into being a great parent and staying healthy.
Your son didn't ask for this. Do your very best to stay on track. Have your husband do the same. Between the two of you, you can be one healthy parent.

[Nammu]

Even if you are not taking your pill medicines its good to see the pdoc so they can monitor how you are doing...you are playing Russian roulette again and your son will be the true victim. The reason for taking meds is continued stability, to stop the roller coaster or at least keep it from reaching the higher highs and the lowest lows.

[Icare dixit]

I would take all meds. They don't just keep you stable the moment you take them but also allow your brain to repair (and it needs to be repaired—definitely with SZA/BP). So it matters not whether you're stable now and you have a lot of catching up to do, so take them.

Clinicians can monitor you, but you might do that yourself by looking at your energy/activity level. Make daily notes of an objective type of measure. Weight loss, the number of steps you take, words per minute, how much you ate (together with weight), heart rate: anything.

[Victoria'smom]

So all the services I can get even though I'm not in need right now. So does this mean I should change clinics so that my husband and I see different T's? If I change clinics I may not be able to get my shot of abilify. Do I move my appointment out a month so I'm on the lamictal at therapeutic level? I really do feel I'm just taking a spot that someone else could use more.

[Nammu]

You are in need. The illness doesn't go away just because you have no current symptoms. It's good for Pdocs to see you relatively stable so they can tell when your not stable. It sound more like you don't want to go and admit you haven't been taking your meds. Pdocs see that all the time and are used to it.

[Victoria'smom]

I don't mind telling him but they don't currently have two therapists (one for myself and one for DH) Do we see the same T or do we move on to a new clinic? He's the same pdoc in both clinics, lol.