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#1
Apr 07, 2016, 08:31 PM
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Its been a long time since I posted in the forum of any category. I'm always depressed I always have been I guess. I am taking celexa but it doesn't help at all with anything. I think about my life and whether I have ever been happy at any point. The conclusion I often come to is that at no point ever have I been happy I've had some happy moments sure spending time with my grandfather watching cartoons on Saturday morning eating cereal but they were just little intervals where I wasn't deeply depressed. I don't know when my depression started but I know I had it when I was 5 some of my earliest memories are remembering hating myself and being depressed in kindergarten. I meet someone online talk to them get to know them become close with them and then they leave for no reason at all. I don't do anything to upset them or anything they just stop talking to me. I seem to be pretty unimportant and very easily cast aside. Whereas I am loyal and have never left anyone I'm always there when someone needs me or needs someoneone to talk to but people seem to forget about me. I wonder if I'm just not meant for the world maybe I'm way too sensitive to be here.
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 Anonymous37883, Anonymous45023, Anonymous59125, gayleggg, gina_re, Mrs. Mania, pirilin, raspberrytorte, Wander
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#2
Apr 07, 2016, 08:52 PM
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Everyone is more genetically similar than you may think
Laugh at tough situations, prepair for the worst but assume the best, and know that everyone has a story. Even if they may look or act a certain way, you never know. So don't compare yourself because we all are giant pieces of *****, you're just the first to admit it |
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#3
Apr 07, 2016, 09:59 PM
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One thing I have noticed about depression is that our perception of our lives becomes very skewed. You may have plenty of times that you have been happy, but you are forgetting them right now because you are looking at your life through depression's lens of reality.
Then again, you may have been depressed more than the average person. But that does not mean that you can't get better. You should let your doctor know that your Celexa is not helping. Sure, give it some time, but after a couple weeks, let the doctor know you are getting no relief. And by all means, if you feel suicidal, go to the ER. You deserve to feel better, and you CAN feel better with proper treatment. In the meantime, while waiting for meds to do their job, make sure you are getting plenty of exercise and try to interact with others and keep a structured schedule. Even if your schedule is 1. Wake up and drink a cup of coffee 2. Shower 3. Go to the grocery store 4. Go for a brisk walk 5. Call a friend or family member, etc. Exercise has been proven to often be as effective as antidepressants, so do some kind of vigorous activity as often as you can. My favorite is dancing and walking, with occasional jogging. Maybe you can find a local support group you can go to for some meaningful social interaction? Do you have a therapist? That would be another thing that could help you. Don't give up. Hang in there. We're rooting for you! 
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#4
Apr 07, 2016, 10:36 PM
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Welcome back! You are not alone. Keep posting if it helps. Are you safe? Hang in there.
__________________
Bipolar 1 with psychotic features PTSD  "Phew! For a minute there I lost myself." 'Karma Police' by Radiohead |
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#5
Apr 09, 2016, 11:38 PM
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Hi. Feel free to message me whenever you want.
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#6
Apr 10, 2016, 05:13 AM
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When I'm depressed, I feel I've always been depressed and never truly been happy. This is a huge lie but I believe it fully in the depression. I remind myself when I'm happy and savor the moments and times.
I hope you are able to pull through this depression and see the happy times in your life soon. If you find you have no happy times, you can start there and begin building them. I know this all sounds like krap right now, in your current state. Please reach out and get the support you need. (((Hugs))) |
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#7
Apr 10, 2016, 09:10 AM
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Quote:
too sensitive .. maybe ... maybe your the "right" one ... and the rest are just sheep ... either way you have a "right" to be here .. and I hope you will find peace in your own skin ... find the real you ... and be happy .... Tigger ... ps: glad to be your friend ... and always there ... write anytime . |
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#8
Apr 10, 2016, 10:19 AM
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Welcome back, I'm so sorry life is so rough on you. I was lucky and depression didn't strike me seriously until I was 32. I can't imagine what you have had to endure.
Online friends find it easy to forget the people that have stood by them, either that are they are so miserable themselves that they can't reach out anymore. Don't take it personally. I'm sorry the medication isn't working.
__________________
Bipolar I, Depression, GAD Meds: Zoloft, Zyprexa, Ritalin "Each morning we are born again. What we do today is what matters most." -Buddha  |
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#9
Apr 10, 2016, 11:05 AM
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Life is a theater with more than a thousand stages. We are all actors trying to give our best performance. Some get center stage, some shiitty stage. For a while. It tumbles around and we all get a chance to shine.
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#10
Apr 10, 2016, 07:58 PM
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Quote:
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#11
Apr 10, 2016, 09:37 PM
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I am bipolar 1 on lexapro and lamictal. I feel pretty balanced. I only take anti-psychotics when manic.
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This is an old thread. You probably should not post your reply to it, as the original poster is unlikely to see it.|
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