Kids

Random thread...

Do any of you have kids?

If you do, how old are they?

If you don't have kids, do you want them?

I don't have any kids. I just graduated from school. I'll probably want some in the future, but for now... I'm broke as hell... Student debt... I was going to buy a house soon, but then I realized I just spent $38,000 last month and now I have no more monies.

I have 1 he'll be 14 in June.

I have two step sons 9 and 6. They can be a hassle! I go through stages of wanting kids and not. I just turned 29 so the sooner the better. More than anything, being a mom to my own sounds scary as hell. Forget about labor itself! Yikes!

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I have three 26 25 and 20.
If I had to give advice to someone today about having kids I would say make
sure you are very financially stable first because it costs a fortune to raise kids
and with the way things are today they need more help to get started than ever before.

I have 1, he's 20. He works at a grocery store. He tried college but got too overwhelmed with working and college. He'll go back though. He's super sweet and sensitive. He lost 120 lbs about 3 yrs ago and has kept it off. Now he works out all the time. I'm very proud of him. Love my boy.

Don't have... not sure I want to. Yes, in one way I want....

but....

a) bringing kids to this ****ed up time? When I do things that may put me on risk?
b) I cannot even come in time to a demo or meeting. How would I be able to pick the kids from school in time? I forget to pay bills for myself... I would SO forget the important kid things.

(which has nothing to do with me being BS. I am just too much of a philosopher).

I have two: 6 & 10. They're amazing. It can make the BP all the more heart-breaking at times, because I feel how profoundly unfair it is to my kids to have to live with. When I'm not depressed, though, I think I'm a pretty great mom. I've gotten pretty good at explaining to them what's going on for me when I get irritable, depressed, or whatever. Even when I snap at them, I'm quick to apologize and let them know if it's something that's going on with me so they KNOW it's not them. The BP can make it hard to handle normal parenting tasks, though.

no kids currently, and I think I would like them at some point in the future but I don't wanna to pass down the family flaw of BP. its not something I would wish upon anyone, and certainly don't want to pass it to my children.

Reminds me of the time I fell asleep in the car and my mom was going to work. I was so quiet that she forgot I was there. (I was 1 years old.) She ended up leaving me in the car and went to work.. but when she went into the car an hour later to get a paper, I was crying and she was like, "oh sh*t" lol

she also forgot to pick me up at daycare on multiple occasions lol

I have one. He is 10.

If I could change things, I would have waited until I was older and more financially stable before I had him. And maybe married so I had help. My family was really there for me the first 5 years with him. Otherwise, I would have been in real trouble.

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I have 2 children. My oldest is 19 and from my first marriage. My youngest is my step son from my husbands first marriage. He's 16. His mother left the picture when he was 3, so my husband and I have raised him without her help for 13 years. My kids keep me grounded and remind me of what is most important to me. I've had a lot of support from my parents and my husbands parents so my kids have had a good life. Not perfect and I would do somethings different if I had the chance, but overall, they are lovely, charming, funny and fabulous kids. I am glad I have them and thankful everyday. Im 41, so the ship may have sailed on having another, but people in my family live till high 90's so the possibility is not off the table. I just need to find true stability first.

Nope
N/A
Kind of on the fence about this.
I'd have to leave this cocktail and I'm very hesitant to do so
After being in the hospital all day with my sister and watched what she went through to pop that kid out...
I don't have a whole lot of patience sometimes
I like having nice things and would prefer to spend money on myself
The peace and quiet will be gone...

According to my mom, I'm probably too old anyway (33)

I enjoy being an aunt though-
I get to have all the good times without having to deal with the 3am feedings, potty training, help with homework, discipline, back to school shopping, etc.

But then again everyone that has kids say that its worth it, so who knows..

You could always adopt

My mom had my sister at 38 yrs old, so 33 isn't too late

We have three sons: 27, 21, and 17. Awesome young men. Wouldn't trade parenthood for the world; they are our joy.

I have a 23 year old son who does live with us, he works full time but doesn't make quite enough to move out just yet, I'm guessing in the next year he'll be on his own though

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I have gone over adoption. The good thing about kids is that tax deduction! But I don't know. I'm kind of over it for right now.
And I don't what my mom is talking about. My grandmother had her at 36 and her brother at 38! But she has two grandchildren now so that's should be good enough for her.
And a couple of my coworkers have told me they didn't have their first kid until 38-40.

I have a son, he's five. He's the love of my life but needs a lot of attention. He was colicky when he was an infant and hardly ever slept so it was very difficult. But I had him before BP symptoms arose again...I thought I was cured, or more accurately, that I never had BP in the first place. If I knew it was going to come back for me I'm not sure I would have had him. He's been through so much in his short life with all my hospital stays and erratic behavior, and then his father dying. It's terrible. I hope every day that he never has to experience this thing called BP. But it seems he's got a slim chance of being unaffected. I wish I had thought it through before bringing him into the world. But I desperately wanted him at the time.

I will most likely never have another child. IF I were to meet another man (big IF) I wouldn't want to take the chance that pregnancy and infancy would destabilize me.

I don't have any kids.... I have never wanted kids and having BP has made me realise I would be a lousy Mum. I have a Nephew and work with children as a volunteer Youth worker. I prefer handing them back at the end of the day lol....

I think you need to be a certain person to be child friendly. Especially wanting kids yourself

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I have 3... Ages 15, 6 and 5. I don't know what I'd do without them!

I have one son who is 13. I love him dearly. I wanted more children but it wasn't in God's plan. Probably wasn't a good idea anyway. Depression was pretty bad after childbirth. I pray he doesn't end up with MI.

I have a daughter. She's four. She was an oh **** pregnancy (actually, when I found out I was pregnant I screamed ****!!!!!! and threw the pregnancy test. lol!).

Anyway, never wanted kids, but things happen.

She's a joy. She gave me a huge hug tonight, wrapped her arms around my neck, and said I love you always. Awe! She's a lot of fun.

Parenting is hard. All the stress and worrying. I was stable before having her. I was in the hospital twice last year with meltdowns (technically two sui attempts, but the first one was more complicated).

I miss the time to myself I used to have. I used to have a life too. Sort of miss that.

Um. Guess that's all I have to say about that.

I do think I'm a fantastic mom though and she's obviously happy and loves me, so I can't be doing a too **** job. lol!

I have one, she's almost five.

I wanted to have a kid, I even thought it might help straighten me out. Nope, just got way crazier. We're not having any more, primarily because of my screwed up brain. I had horrible suicidal PPD, and I'm not sure I'd make it through that again. And I don't think I'd be able to handle any more on my plate than I already have.

I also had PPD, with both my kids. And there was a miscarriage in between them that was pretty hard. I basically was high-functioning depressive for around 10 years. My husband would probably argue the functioning level, but I held a stable job and people outside my home generally didn't know I was depressed.

On the other side, when I have had suicidal thoughts, their presence in my life has been the main thing that has kept me from following through with making/carrying out plans. I can't imagine doing that to them. I have lived through the hell of violent thoughts against myself and against them when they were babies. I have also resented them when in the depths of depression for preventing me from checking out of this life. I don't wish that on anyone.

But I'm still here - and right now I'm in a fairly decent place. I don't know that I would be if it weren't for them. It certainly isn't a reason to have kids...I shudder to think of the times it could have been horrible if I wasn't just strong enough. But I wouldn't trade them for anything - I've never known a love like this. I never felt it so profoundly from my own parents, though they loved me. It's unlike any other love I've experienced.

I have one daughter, age 21. I got pregnant before I knew about the bipolar. She's been a big blessing in my life. However, I didn't want kids and being pregnant was a huge surprise - one that I was glad to have.