[Coffeee]

I got to the doctor this morning even though it was really early then got myself home on public transit even though it was a new route. Then took a well-deserved nap. Now I'm off to where I volunteer so I feel productive. And I found out why I was so tired the last two days

Tried to take a break from life and went on a nice bike ride. Feeling refreshed a little...

Now I gotta go take a shower

Click the pic to make it larger

[hopeless2015]

Great picture blue!!

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[Nammu]

Huge insecurity, questioning if I should post or not post, thinking I'm a terrible person who should just go away....no stress , no stress at all! The movers are coming Monday.

I'm not ready to give up my freedom and move in with anyone yet....too late, it's happening.

I had a busy than usual day with my dog's dental appointment but i still managed to stay on my diet [lifestyle change]. The only thing is now i am worried about my dog because her urine has been clear for a few days. I'll call my vet tomorrow. It's always something with my dog!

[bizi]

Originally Posted by Coconutzo

I've been angry. Last week I was incredibly angry and couldn't find a reason for anything to exist at all. This week, I again feel as though nothing matters at all in this world least of all me. What's different however, is how I feel about that. I feel free. And happy. And the most confident I have felt in a serious amount of time. I feel capable and strong in my brokenness. I feel lighter,and I feel like I will never be the same again. I am renewed.

Even if nothing matters at all and there is zero point to my existence on this earth or a purpose in the existence of said "earth" at all.

Or a porpoise on this earth at all.


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You do matter.
(((((HUGS)))))
bizi

[Standup2me]

I can't stop eating today
What is wrong with me?

[raspberrytorte]

I can't stop eating either!

[bizi]

I ate too much tonight too.
am stuffed and need to go to sleep because I have to get up early and go to work.
bizi

[Coconutzo]

I'm so in love. I'm so lucky. My heart is swelling. Pump in pump out. Pump pump pump.

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[bizi]

Originally Posted by Coconutzo

I'm so in love. I'm so lucky. My heart is swelling. Pump in pump out. Pump pump pump.

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Who is the lucky one?
bizi

[Coconutzo]

Originally Posted by bizi

Who is the lucky one?
bizi

Same guy. Same sitch. But right now, oof

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[Coconutzo]

Maybe he is wearing a new shirt. Maybe the wind has shifted. Maybe feelings... Oof oof am I breathing?

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feeling low and unapreciative of life

despite this week going reasonably well (just a couple of bad days and 1 bad afternoon), i'm still not satisfied

never satisfied with my life. and it gets me down

Since my dog had her teeth cleaned she's had several peeing accidents, one in bed last night. I rushed her to the ER but they couldn't do much but rule out a urinary infection. I have a call into my regular vet. Perhaps she was just given too much IV fluids and the meds have done a number on her usual bladder contol? She's usually so good -- i'm really worried.

[scatterbrained04]

Don't have my son right now so just finished birthday shopping for him. Next I need to find the motivation to clean the house. Good opportunity to purge his stuff. Also, since it's so quiet without him, the tinnitus in my right ear is driving me bat **** crazy!

On a side note, is it bad that I tell everyone no to hanging out when I don't have my kid? It seems like everyone wants to do stuff with me when they find out I don't have him. I only am kid-free a handful of days a year, so love to just be alone those days. But I kind of feel guilty for saying no to people.

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[hopeless2015]

Glad it's Saturday my husband was off yesterday and did groceries so I don't have to worry about that, did a little housework and hope to stay motivated to do more

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Originally Posted by Lefty the Salesman

I've managed to stop popping benzodiazepines during the day

I fell off that wagon hard yesterday. I banged enough Valium and vapor yesterday to recruit a busload of Juggalos to the Society for Krishna Consciousness.

The vet called and he thinks the peeing accidents are due to the IV fluids my dog was given during her dental procedure. So that's a relief! He says just to keep an eye on her and he'll call on Monday to check on her. I'm going to take her out every two hours to pee and hopefully empty her out for the night. Oh well, a few peeing accidents aren't going to kill me! She's worth it!

[Unrigged64072835]

Another quiet day, except for a rumble of thunder here and there. I'm finding that it's not too bad.

So... yesterday I went shopping at Whole Foods and got a bunch of things that I like.

I decided to buy a healthy honey-nut oat cereal called "Heart to Heart" by Kashi. omg. I ate it this morning and it was literally the WORST thing I've ever tasted! lol. I had to add loads of cinnamon and sugar just to eat it, and even then, it was just alright. Though I guess adding all that crap to the cereal defeated the purpose of eating healthy. *sigh*

But I did manage to sneak in a bike ride yesterday. Hoping to do so again today... but probably in the afternoon when everyone is gone. Might even do some jogging as well if time permits!

[hopeless2015]

Slept in this morning but got up feeling pretty good. Need to go pick up a prescription and try to do a little more cleaning today, I made a little progress on that yesterday. We met some friends for dinner and a couple of drinks last night, it was nice

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[OctobersBlackRose]

Actually slept at night for once, took my Geodon in the morning to see how it's going to affect me when I have to take it twice a day, stuff knocked me out after about an hour, and slept until 2:00pm this afternoon. Colored my hair, it's a violet soft black, and did laundry. And I finally have an appitite back w/o much nausea, yay! Not too bad of a day, just some period cramps, but ibuprofen helps that.

[Unrigged64072835]

Another calm, good day. Rested for a bit, and finished up the laundry for now.

[Wander]

Day four off Latuda and I have been feeling more anxious but nothing too bad. Hoping it will pass. Also hoping coming off the Latuda will improve my brain function as I have felt so brain dead since I started it. Sleeping heaps. My brain may be improving slightly. Think my thought are a bit faster than the snails pace or completely stopped feeling I had before. Not hungry. Generally feeling alone and lost. Confused about life. Might still be a bit depressed. Trying to keep busy, study, work, exercise and see family. My mood is very flat. I don't feel any joy.