I wonder how common it is to get sui thoughts when (hypo)manic, as I keep getting them out of extreme agitation/frustration. I'm not mixed or depressed, either. I saw my pdoc on Friday and he said I was hypo (and I believe I am, too). If you ignore the sui thoughts and irritability, I meet 0 of the criteria for a depressive episode/

It all started after I took Seroquel 2 nights ago. This has actually happened with Seroquel before too, but I brushed it off as being a coincidence. Now I see that it's not a coincidence at all. It keeps happening.

I guess the "concern" is that I have racing thoughts and impulsivity from the hypomania. ****. I hope my mood is not transitioning into full-blown mania.

Originally Posted by Standup2me

It's so cold here (-43) that the snow crunches underfoot. The sky is clear and the moon is as bright as a beacon. I want to dance in the moonlight and drink in her energy.
Life is energy and energy is life

Does it normally get that cold in Alberta in the winter? I thought -20F here was cold, but -43C/-43F is pretty bad. (Well, it's not -20F here right now, but sometimes it gets that cold with windchill.)

[hopeless2015]

Got up showered and came to work. I'm going to try really hard to not miss any time before the Christmas holiday...that's this week and 4 days next week. I really need to stick to a routine now and I actually feel better than I did last week. They upped my Lamictal dose so hopefully that will give me the relief I need.

[Coconutzo]

Blue!

I get sui thoughts and self harm when I'm manic for sure. It's a dangerous place to be with the impulsivity of mania. Take care!

[Coconutzo]

I'm off mentally. I don't know in what direction, I just know that I'm sick. My sleep schedule is shot. I've been having serious anxiety. I'm hypersensitive and hypersexual. My thoughts are racing. I'm not manic but I feel disconnected and confused.

[CloserToTheMid]

I'm really out of sorts. There are multiple possible factors. I'm on a new medicine Saphris as of last Wednesday. I lost nearly an entire night of sleep night before last. I recently started smoking again to help with manic symptoms until Saphris kicked in and now I'm hooked again. Can't focus. I have a lot of stress to deal with. My mind is racing and obsessive. Very uncomfortable! I just want to go home and take some sort of magical pill to make it all go away....spoken like an alcoholic.

What do I do?

Originally Posted by CloserToTheMid

I'm really out of sorts. There are multiple possible factors. I'm on a new medicine Saphris as of last Wednesday. I lost nearly an entire night of sleep night before last. I recently started smoking again to help with manic symptoms until Saphris kicked in and now I'm hooked again. Can't focus. I have a lot of stress to deal with. My mind is racing and obsessive. Very uncomfortable! I just want to go home and take some sort of magical pill to make it all go away....spoken like an alcoholic.

What do I do?

Keep doing what you're doing. No drinking....reach out for support when you need it. Write us here,talk with wife, friend, sponsor or doctor. I'm sorry you are struggling so much and I hope you find peace soon.

[Nammu]

:dancingchili: I slept last night. Broken and many weird dreams( one where I was an undercover agent in a nation park catching illegal restaurants in the woods..?) but I got more sleep than I've had in over a week. Very helpful!

[Standup2me]

Originally Posted by bluebicycle

I wonder how common it is to get sui thoughts when (hypo)manic, as I keep getting them out of extreme agitation/frustration. I'm not mixed or depressed, either. I saw my pdoc on Friday and he said I was hypo (and I believe I am, too). If you ignore the sui thoughts and irritability, I meet 0 of the criteria for a depressive episode/

It all started after I took Seroquel 2 nights ago. This has actually happened with Seroquel before too, but I brushed it off as being a coincidence. Now I see that it's not a coincidence at all. It keeps happening.

I guess the "concern" is that I have racing thoughts and impulsivity from the hypomania. ****. I hope my mood is not transitioning into full-blown mania.


Does it normally get that cold in Alberta in the winter? I thought -20F here was cold, but -43C/-43F is pretty bad. (Well, it's not -20F here right now, but sometimes it gets that cold with windchill.)

It is not usually this cold, we're just in an arctic freeze. It is only supposed to last for a week or so...thank heavens!!
-25C or so would our normal for this time of year

[Moose72]

Too sleepy today and sleeping too much today. Watching a movie I recorded last night. Had a snack and some cranberry ginger ale.

[Icare dixit]

Day 2... (and no depression (no really, this time!) or anxiety, almost calm, so I'm very optimistic))

Nammu, interesting dream!

[Standup2me]

I sometimes feel like my head is shaking, but in reality it is not. I wonder why?

[gina_re]

Disability claim was approved through my return to work date (January 2nd)!!!
A few bills may be late, but finally knowing I get some income for all this time off puts me somewhat at ease. Still working on controlling anxiety.
Picked up all my meds today and bought a few groceries. I also stopped by the music store for some sheet music to teach myself how to play the flute again. It's been 20 years, but I'm racking my brain to get a hobby to help keep me calm.
Still need to clean my room though.

[gina_re]

Originally Posted by Standup2me

I sometimes feel like my head is shaking, but in reality it is not. I wonder why?

Sometimes I feel like I'm floating, kind of like my legs aren't attached to me. It's a weird feeling, but I kinda like it.

[Moose72]

Originally Posted by gina_re

Sometimes I feel like I'm floating, kind of like my legs aren't attached to me. It's a weird feeling, but I kinda like it.

I feel that way too. Like I'm floating along.

[Wander]

Originally Posted by bluebicycle

I wonder how common it is to get sui thoughts when (hypo)manic, as I keep getting them out of extreme agitation/frustration. I'm not mixed or depressed, either. I saw my pdoc on Friday and he said I was hypo (and I believe I am, too). If you ignore the sui thoughts and irritability, I meet 0 of the criteria for a depressive episode/

It all started after I took Seroquel 2 nights ago. This has actually happened with Seroquel before too, but I brushed it off as being a coincidence. Now I see that it's not a coincidence at all. It keeps happening.

I guess the "concern" is that I have racing thoughts and impulsivity from the hypomania. ****. I hope my mood is not transitioning into full-blown mania.


Does it normally get that cold in Alberta in the winter? I thought -20F here was cold, but -43C/-43F is pretty bad. (Well, it's not -20F here right now, but sometimes it gets that cold with windchill.)

My nurse (I am currently IP) told me last week that I had a suicidal mania which is exactly as you described; full-blown mania, no depressive symptoms so no mixed, and very suicidal. She said it can be extremely dangerous so please be careful Blue. Call your pdoc if you think you might act. It is a serious emergency as the intensity of the suicidal urges and energy of mania are a deadly combo.

[Unrigged64072835]

Rough day today. Had both pdoc and T, plus picking up meds. My husband has been a doofus all day, but I've forgiven him so it's all good. Seeing the regular doc tomorrow. Probably get an earful on my blood sugar but I'm prepared.

[Melmo]

Had a terrible day today. Was very short tempered, explosive anger where I yelled a few times, punched a door, felt like smashing things but didn't. Felt like I just. Couldn't.handle.anything. Wanted to hide in my room all day but unfortunately that wasn't an option. Felt guilty and cried.
Hoping tomorrow is better. Thankfully my appt with my psychiatrist is on Wednesday.

[xRavenx]

I broke down today. I was literally shaking in my therapist's office. Almost got into accidents driving, because my anxiety is so high, and I feel out of control (had a close call twice). My head hurts from all the crying. My therapist recommended I call my pdoc tomorrow and try to get in asap since my mood swings are getting severe. I feel like I'm completely falling apart.

Family tries to give suggestions, but they seem to think as long as I follow simple suggestions, everything will be okay, but they do not realize it is not that easy, and I'm just really self-destructive when I get into these states of mind. I wish the people close to me would understand better. I've made my mother mad because I can't control what comes out of my mouth, although I know it's no excuse.

I'm exhausted, but feel too agitated to be able to go right to sleep. These meds are not doing their job anymore. I just don't want to end up in the hospital. Just letting it out, since I don't really know what else to do anymore.

[Moose72]

I've just been sleeping most of the day. Did get out of bed to eat and now forced myself to watch TV to stay up. Besides my son just got home from his piano lesson. (His step mom drives him). Now I can relax. Wondering if I'll be going out tomorrow. My son says the roads are better today but I'd have to scrape off my car. Seems difficult.

[bizi]

Originally Posted by hopeless2015

Got up showered and came to work. I'm going to try really hard to not miss any time before the Christmas holiday...that's this week and 4 days next week. I really need to stick to a routine now and I actually feel better than I did last week. They upped my Lamictal dose so hopefully that will give me the relief I need.

maintenance dose is usually 200mg.
Where are you now?
bizi

[Melmo]

Originally Posted by xRavenx

I broke down today. I was literally shaking in my therapist's office. Almost got into accidents driving, because my anxiety is so high, and I feel out of control (had a close call twice). My head hurts from all the crying. My therapist recommended I call my pdoc tomorrow and try to get in asap since my mood swings are getting severe. I feel like I'm completely falling apart.

Family tries to give suggestions, but they seem to think as long as I follow simple suggestions, everything will be okay, but they do not realize it is not that easy, and I'm just really self-destructive when I get into these states of mind. I wish the people close to me would understand better. I've made my mother mad because I can't control what comes out of my mouth, although I know it's no excuse.

I'm exhausted, but feel too agitated to be able to go right to sleep. These meds are not doing their job anymore. I just don't want to end up in the hospital. Just letting it out, since I don't really know what else to do anymore.

This sounds a lot like how I feel, so I get it. Hope you feel better soon.

[xRavenx]

Originally Posted by Melmo

This sounds a lot like how I feel, so I get it. Hope you feel better soon.

Thanks, Melmo. I hope you feel better too soon.

Peeking in a little, not much, but wanted to give hugs all around.

Just too messed. Holding tight. Will go in if needed. Pretending to have hope. For now anyway. Universe, please prove my fears wrong, 'cause I'm filled with ****** terror ...

[Icare dixit]

Originally Posted by Innerzone

Peeking in a little, not much, but wanted to give hugs all around.

Just too messed. Holding tight. Will go in if needed. Pretending to have hope. For now anyway. Universe, please prove my fears wrong, 'cause I'm filled with ****** terror ...

Can you pretend to have hope?

I'd say that's hope. Sounds more hopeful, at least. Not confident, but hopeful.



There's always hope. No certainties.

[Icare dixit]

********

But hopeful and even optimistic, possibly deluded.

We'll just start over: day 1...