[ByMySide]

Actually came home from work at a decent time (still later than I would have liked but earlier than last week). Managed to watch some Netflix, take my melatonin and fall asleep at a decent time. Then I had an odd dream, the kind I woke up gasping from and had to turn on the lights to convince myself I was in fact safe. So now I'm awake. Wide awake. I went to bed just 2 hours ago.

[emgreen]

Styill only getting 3-4 hours sleep a night, but it doesn't feel like there's an episode coming on. When I don't sleep for two days or more, I'll worry.

[hopeless2015]

Little late coming into work but I made it. Just realized I didn't take my morning meds. CRAP, I've had too many issues with med compliance lately. I need to concentrate on fixing that.

[Moose72]

I just asked my good friend if I can have her old wallet. Mine is just a small one that stacks the cards against each other so they slide against each other every time you take one out. That wore out the numbers and magnetic strip on one so I had to call to get a replacement- a replacement that they told me, even after having it for 13 YEARS! I was only allowed ONE! WTF? Even banks send you replacement cards more often than that. (And their numbers on the card are in 3D, not just printed on as is the case on this card. I couldn't read the numbers anymore.) So in order to avoid that happening to the new card (which won't be here for "3 to 5 business days"), I asked for the other wallet. So now that you know more than you wanted to...

[Nammu]

Originally Posted by hopeless2015

Little late coming into work but I made it. Just realized I didn't take my morning meds. CRAP, I've had too many issues with med compliance lately. I need to concentrate on fixing that.

I even moved my morning meds to the kitchen table thinking I might see them better, problem is I don't eat breakfast. Guess I could try taping them to the tv remote?

[Unrigged64072835]

I have one med that I put in the kitchen because I'm supposed to take it with meals. I still don't remember and my husband reminds me.

Did a load of laundry today. Wrote a poem. I'm trying to write one a day. Hopefully I'll have enough good ones to put into a book. Just have to figure out which ones are good.

Other than that not much is happening. My husband is making honey BBQ wings and it sounds good.

[piano97]

Keep writing your poems! Doesn't matter if are "good" or "bad", I bet all are good and helpful to your health.

[Incubus]

Checking with an OK day. Very slow at work. Been having an itch to become clergy (within my religion)but wife doesn't understand why or what I want to do with it.

[MobiusPsyche]

Depressed and tired. Took a shower, went to MD appointment, went to T appointment, ate lunch at a restaurant and did a bit of work while eating. Still have work to do tonight (must be done tonight). So tired.

[Moose72]

Didn't do much today. Just hung around at home with kids. Around 1 my daughter went to her boyfriend's but is coming home tonight. I have to do laundry and get a shower. Always seems like a chore to do both.

[LadyShadow]

Loss my sense of spirituality, and on a downward spiral since I quit my job. Hoping I can find strength soon.

[bizi]

Will start back in therapy, been a long time with out.
Now I feel I am ready to get to work on my issues.
I have an addictive nature: food, alcohol and internet.
This is interfering with my home life.
bizi
Start next week!

[xRavenx]

The depression is not as heavy, and I'm no longer experiencing mixed mania. I hope this continues. It's just one day at a time. I'm not symptom-free, but at baseline, I always have some symptoms. Some would say I am a little hypo, but I'm so glad these meds helped to get me out of such a dark place. I do not feel out of the woods since I cycle a lot more these days, but that's just the nature of Bipolar to me. I want to try to stay in the moment, and I feel relief that things got a little more manageable.

[lola0987]

Finally appt with new psychiatrist. I see the light at end of tunnel. Started new job with underprivileged kids it's awesome helping them and gets me out of my head. Love my new job.

Originally Posted by lola0987

Finally appt with new psychiatrist. I see the light at end of tunnel. Started new job with underprivileged kids it's awesome helping them and gets me out of my head. Love my new job.

what job do you do?

I am glad you like it

finding very little reason to be happy/ positive

days are run of the mill really.

getting quite old- especially the lack of support

[usehername]

I haven't taken a shower in so long I can't remember... I've been keeping clean, but it's getting gross. I don't have time! And I hate showering anyway. People used to go like an entire year without bathing. Why does everyone insist it has to be done daily? If it's been this long, and my coworkers haven't said something, what's the problem? They would definitely say something, too. I took off a shoe once to try to figure out what size I wear and they all vowed to buy me a new pair. I work a highly physical job, too... but I don't know. To hell with showering. It sucks and it takes too long. Especially with three foot long curly hair that dreds up.

Originally Posted by usehername

I haven't taken a shower in so long I can't remember... I've been keeping clean, but it's getting gross. I don't have time! And I hate showering anyway. People used to go like an entire year without bathing. Why does everyone insist it has to be done daily? If it's been this long, and my coworkers haven't said something, what's the problem? They would definitely say something, too. I took off a shoe once to try to figure out what size I wear and they all vowed to buy me a new pair. I work a highly physical job, too... but I don't know. To hell with showering. It sucks and it takes too long. Especially with three foot long curly hair that dreds up.

(((((hugs))))

I don't really know. I guess it's just 1 of those things expected of you now.

back when people didn't bave for a year, they didn't have all the good drainage systems/ good technology we have nowadays (and I can bet they didn't have nice soaps and stuff).

times just change, I guess

back then the kings and queens of england probably didn't much care how their subjects walked the streets.

but now.. because you can buy nice soaps, and you can buy nice shampoo, and people can aford big houses, it's expected of people

or something

maybe history was just gross and it was always expected.

[usehername]

I can't buy all that nice stuff. I can barely keep my water turned on. That might be part of the aversion. :/

I should add that actually, I think showers are overrated

maybe I say that because I spend 99.9 percent of my time alone, so don't really care

but think about it

you spend all that time showering and looking nice, only to get dirty again later undoing all that work

[hopeless2015]

Feeling ok today, trying to be productive

[Unrigged64072835]

Rough day today. Had a bit of anxiety and knocked it down with meds, but it almost knocked me out as well. I just wish my back wasn't so screwed up.

[lola0987]

Originally Posted by shattered sanity

what job do you do?

I am glad you like it

Teacher for at risk kids

Originally Posted by lola0987

Finally appt with new psychiatrist. I see the light at end of tunnel. Started new job with underprivileged kids it's awesome helping them and gets me out of my head. Love my new job.

[Turtlesoup]

Been busy-ok day today but a little irritable this evening. It's been super cold here 52 below today so didn't go out. Feeling better just tired. As my old tdoc told me you are entitled to full range of emotions so trying not to fixate on the negative.

I'm really struggling. I just want to die. I'm stuck and hopeless. I'm in misery with no way out. I have so much I need to talk about but just can't. I protect my abusers and always have. I'm so stupid. I need to break everything and put the pieces back together into something different. I'm taking extra pills and going to sleep. I hope I don't wake up.