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#951
Apr 18, 2017, 05:25 PM
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Pdoc appt went horrible today. It left me f_cking pissed off. Waste of a $20 copay.
I basically requested a medication change because I hate Seroquel. Nope. "Take more. You'll appreciate it more." F_cking really? Are you f_cking kidding me? Therapist appt went horrible too Not a good day, not one bit. |
 AmandaBroken, Anonymous45023, jacky8807, Nammu, Sunflower123, Unrigged64072835, Wild Coyote, xRavenx
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 AmandaBroken
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#952
Apr 18, 2017, 05:35 PM
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Quote:
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| AmandaBroken, Unrigged64072835
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| AmandaBroken
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#953
Apr 18, 2017, 05:38 PM
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Quote:
__________________
Qui Cantat Bis Orat ingrezza 80 mg Propranolol 40 mg Benztropine 1 mg Vraylar 3 mg Gabapentin 300 mg Klonopin 1 mg 2x daily Mania Sept/Oct 2024 Mania (July/August 2024) Mania (December 2023) Mixed episode/Hypomania (September 2023) Depression, Anxiety and Intrusive thoughts (September 2021) Depression & Psychosis (July/August 2021) |
| AmandaBroken, Unrigged64072835
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| AmandaBroken
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#954
Apr 18, 2017, 09:28 PM
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A day of possibilities
Wasted Lost forever Gone But tomorrow is a few hours away And tomorrow is a day full of possibilities
__________________
What's so funny about peace, love and understanding? Elvis Costello |
| AmandaBroken, Unrigged64072835, Wild Coyote
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| AmandaBroken, jacky8807, xRavenx
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#955
Apr 18, 2017, 09:36 PM
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I took my oldest daughter 's kitten to the shelter. She did not want him anymore. I did not...I have a puppy. I pray he gets a good home. My younger daughter and I went out to eat. Then we went home and played cards. We're trying to find other things besides just watch tv. Yesterday we worked a word search.
__________________
#SpoonieStrong Spoons are a visual representation used as a unit of measure to quantify how much energy individuals with disabilities and chronic illnesses have throughout a given day. 1). Depression 2). PTSD 3). Anxiety 4). Hashimoto 5). Fibromyalgia 6). Asthma 7). Atopic dermatitis 8). Chronic Idiopathic Urticaria 9). Hereditary Angioedema (HAE-normal C-1) 10). Gluten sensitivity 11). EpiPen carrier 12). Food allergies, medication allergies and food intolerances. . 13). Alopecia Areata |
| AmandaBroken, Sunflower123, Unrigged64072835, Wild Coyote, xRavenx
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| AmandaBroken, jacky8807
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#956
Apr 18, 2017, 10:27 PM
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I am extremely irritated. Lately, I feel I need to do whatever it takes to make use of this life I have been given. It has been a bad few years, and now I want to take back my life and do all the things I haven't done. I wish the people closest to me understood where I'm coming from lately. It's hard for me to cope with comments that put me down, just to be told that I'm being too sensitive. I just can't anymore. Rant over.
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| AmandaBroken, Anonymous45023, jacky8807, Nammu, Sunflower123, Unrigged64072835, Wild Coyote
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| AmandaBroken, jacky8807
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#957
Apr 19, 2017, 05:43 AM
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Finally saw my pdoc today after 8 days (he has been on holidays while I have been IP) and he dropped my Prozac (going hypomanic in a major way), put me on slow release Lithium, increased Ability, took me off Seroquel and reduced my Clonazepam. All good choices I think.
Today I have been extremely hypomanic. My mind is all over the place, I feel like I have a million pieces of a puzzle in my brain and if I can solve them i will have solved the unified field theory of physics. Yeh, I am on the crazy side. Med changes should calm me down. Just found out a best friend from high school/univerity died. I hadn't seen her in a few years but still loved her, yet I feel no response. No sadness...nothing. Must be the hypomania. Guess it will hit me later. At the funeral.
__________________
Bipolar 1 with psychotic features PTSD  "Phew! For a minute there I lost myself." 'Karma Police' by Radiohead |
| AmandaBroken, Anonymous45023, bizi, jacky8807, Unrigged64072835, Wild Coyote
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| AmandaBroken, scatterbrained04
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#958
Apr 19, 2017, 05:52 AM
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all I want is for the sun to go hide behind a few clouds, and i'll probably feel better.
sun really affects my mood in a bad way, and I hate it |
| AmandaBroken, Anonymous45023, jacky8807, Unrigged64072835, Wild Coyote
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| AmandaBroken
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#959
Apr 19, 2017, 06:49 AM
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ha wander I remember feeling like that with the physics and all that. oh I just knew so much about physics I was going to go back to school for it! hey maybe I could of if I stayed manic lol. watch for the crash
on my way shortly to drive my oldest to drivers ed. and my youngest to April vacation camp. didn't sleep but I really don't want to waste the day doing that so I'm going to see how I feel.
__________________
I used to rule the world Seas would rise when I gave the word Now in the morning, I sleep alone Sweep the streets I used to own I used to roll the dice Feel the fear in my enemy's eyes Listen as the crowd would sing Now the old king is dead! Long live the king! One minute I held the key Next the walls were closed on me And I discovered that my castles stand Upon pillars of salt and pillars of sand |
| AmandaBroken, Unrigged64072835, Wild Coyote
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| AmandaBroken, Wander
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#960
Apr 19, 2017, 07:34 AM
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Finally was able to stay away from my tablet and phone last night. I'm not nearly as tired as I usually am in the morning. I really need to keep doing this. I would be so much more productive the following day.
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| AmandaBroken, Anonymous45023, Unrigged64072835, Wild Coyote
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| AmandaBroken, Nammu
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#961
Apr 19, 2017, 07:54 AM
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Getting a little boost from Adderall. DH and I went to nearby city yesterday to run errands. Also walked a lot in the marketplace on a sunny, breezy Spring day.
  WC |
| AmandaBroken
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| AmandaBroken, Cocosurviving, jacky8807
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#962
Apr 19, 2017, 08:06 AM
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Quote:
Thanks for making me laugh
__________________
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| AmandaBroken, Nammu
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| AmandaBroken, jacky8807
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#963
Apr 19, 2017, 08:17 AM
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911am and already got into a fight with my mother. don t know if it's her or me. she has pretty faulty thinking my whole life and just a host of other issues so I'm leaning towards her. but I feel bad at some things I said bringing up the past which I know she feels guilty about already.
It seems whenever I'm doing really good she has to find something to bring me down. bringing people down is her specialty but the thing is she doesn't even realize it. sigh. sorry for the rant. I'm going back and forth in my head whether to sleep because I work tonight or just wing it. but that would mean 2 nights with no sleep which is a nono
__________________
I used to rule the world Seas would rise when I gave the word Now in the morning, I sleep alone Sweep the streets I used to own I used to roll the dice Feel the fear in my enemy's eyes Listen as the crowd would sing Now the old king is dead! Long live the king! One minute I held the key Next the walls were closed on me And I discovered that my castles stand Upon pillars of salt and pillars of sand |
| AmandaBroken, Anonymous45023, gina_re, Nammu, Sunflower123, Unrigged64072835, Wild Coyote
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| AmandaBroken
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#964
Apr 19, 2017, 09:09 AM
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At p doc waiting room, time to renew fmla papers and general check in with her. Shouldn't need any med changes right now.
__________________
Current Meds Lamictal 200 mg x2 Seroquel 100 mg |
| AmandaBroken, gina_re, jacky8807, Unrigged64072835, Wild Coyote
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| AmandaBroken
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#965
Apr 19, 2017, 09:16 AM
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Feeling useless...
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| Anonymous45023, bizi, Daonnachd, jacky8807, Sunflower123, Unrigged64072835, Wild Coyote
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#966
Apr 19, 2017, 11:59 AM
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Quote:
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| AmandaBroken
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| AmandaBroken
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#967
Apr 19, 2017, 12:08 PM
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Appt went well go back in 8 weeks and she is thinking we will go off trileptal and up Lamictal then, didn't want to mess with meds cause I was on last day of steroid and those can cause mood issues. She thinks the trileptal is causing all the concentration issues so I will be happy to ween off it, plus it will take me down to 3 meds from 4
__________________
Current Meds Lamictal 200 mg x2 Seroquel 100 mg |
| AmandaBroken, Anonymous45023, jacky8807, Unrigged64072835, Wild Coyote
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| AmandaBroken
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#968
Apr 19, 2017, 12:26 PM
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My sons are leaving today on the school's music tour. The older plays clarinet; the younger plays bass clarinet. The older also will be singing with the advanced choir in a competition. He's always been a singer. I'm not surprised the director recruited him for this. I'll miss them. They don't get back until Monday night.
__________________
>< |
| AmandaBroken, Anonymous45023, Unrigged64072835, Wild Coyote
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| AmandaBroken, jacky8807, Nammu
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#969
Apr 19, 2017, 01:02 PM
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Having to rest today. Had done a lot of walking yesterday (aerobic pace). With CFS* (aka ME** and SEID***), there's an "exertional intolerance" and it takes extra time to recover from the exertion involved.
Fibromyalgia is also acting up big time, for the first time in a long time. (I deal with several additional conditions, mostly autoimmune in nature.) I try to accept it and pace myself. It can be challenging and disappointing. I feel unusually "fragile" and am trying to distract myself from very depressed thoughts. I just feel like it's all an uphill battle (too often). Tomorrow is another day, thankfully. WC *CFS: Chronic Fatigue Syndrome **ME: Myalgic Encephalomyelitis ***SEID: Systemic Exertional Intolerance Disorder (This is the newer clinical name for CFS/ME in the U.S.) |
| AmandaBroken, Anonymous45023, bizi, jacky8807, Nammu, Unrigged64072835
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| AmandaBroken
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#970
Apr 19, 2017, 02:48 PM
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Feeling kind of blah today. My concentration sucks. Having strong urges to SH, which is something I haven't done in about 3 years or so.
Last edited by scatterbrained04; Apr 19, 2017 at 05:43 PM. |
| Anonymous45023, jacky8807, Unrigged64072835, Wild Coyote
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#971
Apr 19, 2017, 02:51 PM
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Just got back from first therapy group meeting in a long time. We were just a few, it went okay. I'm glad I finally went today.
__________________
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| AmandaBroken, Anonymous45023, gina_re, jacky8807, Nammu, Unrigged64072835, Wild Coyote
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| AmandaBroken, Cocosurviving
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#972
Apr 19, 2017, 03:52 PM
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Nammu - I have that problem too. Bending over is definitely painful, and I have a cat who's begging for attention.
Did a load of laundry, worked on my poems. Had to lie down when the anxiety got bad. My pharmacy gave me the wrong prescription of Artane so I'll have to go back to the pdoc and have her resend it. Ugh. I should do this before school starts (May 15). Other than that not much is happening. |
| AmandaBroken, Nammu, Wild Coyote
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| AmandaBroken, Nammu
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#973
Apr 19, 2017, 04:11 PM
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Just got home from one of those wards where there is a physical fight twice a week.
Now on a lot of new meds, including wellbutrin. I snorted 4 of them today already.. i need help. My program for after care is dual-diagnosis, thank god. |
| AmandaBroken, bizi, Nammu, Wild Coyote
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| AmandaBroken, bizi
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#974
Apr 19, 2017, 04:43 PM
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Quote:
You snorted Wellbutrin? Any particular reason? I would think that would burn a little.
__________________
Meds: Latuda, Lamictal XR, Vyvanse, Seroquel, Klonopin Supplements: Monster Energy replacement. Also DLPA, tyrosine, glutamine, and tryptophan
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| AmandaBroken, Wild Coyote
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| AmandaBroken, Wild Coyote
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#975
Apr 19, 2017, 04:52 PM
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well, I slept about 4 hours. Have a long day ahead of me with lots of study. Just hope my brain works. Mood mixed. Was hypo yesterday but went dark last night and almost ran from the IP facility I am in. So impulsive, agitated and irritable. Feel wired. Wish I could sleep but it is 6am here so need to get up and get into it...and I am not tired anyway. Had 15mg Diazepam and 2 mg of Clonazepam last night to calm me down but still couldn't sleep much. Feel such rage and wild. This is not good. Hopefully, I will calm down as the day passes.
Still have yet to process my friends death (yesterday) due to my moods but I guess that will come with time. Have waves of sadness then go happy/mixed again.
__________________
Bipolar 1 with psychotic features PTSD "Phew! For a minute there I lost myself." 'Karma Police' by Radiohead |
| AmandaBroken, Anonymous45023, bizi, Nammu, Wild Coyote
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| AmandaBroken
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| Closed Thread |
This is an old thread. You probably should not post your reply to it, as the original poster is unlikely to see it.|
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