[Wander]

Just saw my new pdoc for the second time. He seems like a great guy who is very skilled. He diagnosed me with BP1 with psychotic features and anxiety from a history of trauma. This seems reasonable to me. He increased my Lithium and wants me to take 20mg of Abilfy a day until my symptoms (agitation, hallucinations, irritability, racing thoughts etc) calm down. I can also take up to 2mg of Clonazepam a day till I calm down and must reduce the Ritalin to 30mg a day with the idea of coming off completely.

I didn't ask where I am at at the moment but it is likely I am mixed. He wants to see me in 12 days and call if I worsen. It is such a relief to be taken seriously and be treated for the right illness without having to endure being preached to about how i should return to Christianity. Hopefully the increase in meds will calm things down and I will avoid IP treatment. Today at university I was asked to stop talking twice as I interrupted people and talked when we were supposed to be silent. I am so impatient and find it hard to not speak when the urge overcomes me. It was embarrassing. I am so wound up, so not calm. At least I can find peace that I now have a great T and pdoc to help me with this horrible illness.

[Shamrockkid88]

I was in a ver similar boat for almost ten years before I ditched the old psydoc got back on lithium and was correctly diagnosed BP II. I actually just went and saw my psydoc yesterday and bumped up my lithium which honestly I'm ok with because I know I need it my moods still aren't completely where they should be imo. I felt the same way like it was a breath of fresh air to have someone who listens and gets it. I've been educating myself about it to fight the stigma!

[Victoria'smom]

It's great that he's trying to help without pushing religion on you. Hopefully the med changes work and you'll feel better soon.

[Moose72]

I wonder if your old Pdoc realizes that he actually pushed you away from Christianity.

[Wander]

Originally Posted by Moose72

I wonder if your old Pdoc realizes that he actually pushed you away from Christianity.

I was already pretty far away from Christianity but he certainly put a few more nails in the coffin. I should have told him that his 'witnessing' was a big fat failure. However, I did tell him that the pressure he put on me by continuously bringing up god and christianity caused me distress. He said he would take it on board but later said he can't be a person he is not. Sigh...I don't think he will change. I feel for his other patients.

[Wild Coyote]

I am very happy for you!

Your former pdoc was creating additional burdens for you (to make himself feel more comfortable).

Your relationship with your new pdoc seems to have the elements for a much more helpful relationship.

(((((( Wander ))))))


WC

[Cdnstargazer]

Yikes. Your old pdoc sounds like a quack. No offense.

I'm glad you found a pdoc who takes you seriously and agrees to follow up with you.

[Eddiesmom]

I agree your old pdoc sounds like a quack, I remember when I was a teenager and was in a psych hospital because of my bipolar, mixed then I was 14 and a pastor was called to talk to me, lived in the Bible Belt then and he thought if I prayed hard enough it would take the evil spirits away, he didn't say it like that but he pushed and pushed for me to save myself, I was already saved, but he thought he could just take everything away in one fell swoop, well I am sorry it doesn't work like that, my brain chemistry was all out of whack and no prayers from him were going to quiet my sick mind back then, although I do still believe in God that experience opened my eyes. I am glad you found someone good and you feel comfortable with your new pdoc, hope the new meds help and you are back to recovery! Lela

[Wander]

Thanks everyone. My last pdoc knew I had been mentally and spiritually abused by many people in authority in the church in the past. They had tried to cast demons out of me to 'heal' my mental illness and when I didn't recover immediately I was told I must have sinned again to let the demons back in. This went on for five years. I was very vulnerable and passive at the time, and very unwell. This severely traumatised me and filled me with confusion, guilt and shame. It has taken me years to recover and was not the reason I left Christianity. That is another story. Despite knowing this he went on to hurt me in similar ways. I am so, so thrilled to be free of him.

[Wild Coyote]

I'm very sorry for all you've endured.
Your recent pdoc sounds guilty of malpractice.

I have known certain groups of Christians guilty of doing these types of things around mental illness. It's scary and devastating. The wounds run deep.

I hope you can heal from this experience from your pdoc, as well as from other experiences.

(((((( Wander )))))))


WC

[pirilin]

Your previous pdoc is a fanatic. And inconsidered too.
He abandons you because he's so much better than you are and he was doing you a favor bending his rules. I can't take the "righteous".
Change , most of the time is for the better. Be happy.

[Wander]

The agitation seems to be calming down today (Saturday). Seems the med increase my new pdoc suggested is working. Yeh! Here's hoping I return to stable soon. In fact I am feeling a bit high right now. Probably just thrilled I am not climbing the walls anymore and that I finally, after 17 years, have found a great pdoc. Time to dance around the room

Like this?
Hell, yeah! So glad for you that this one seems to be a good one!