Reasons for Continuing to Try - Join in!

I left you a reply on your thread. Please hold on and seek help.

I just joined to better understand what my son may be feeling. I hope you all stick around because everything you have been through helps people that have someone that is just starting to navigate the spectrum. The experiences you have had with society, when you share them, truly help me understand my son better. I pray he learns to communicate this way one day and share what he is going through. You are all valuable and important - please keep sharing and know your words are helping me!!

Because I want to prove that I can…

and you will because we believe in you!

Thank you Amanda

You are most Welcome...

My only reason to keep going is to avoid hurting my mom. If I committed suicide, I feel like it would be a slap in her face for bringing me into this world. And she's been so supportive for so long.

My husband's smile.


WC

Snyder's Honey Mustard and Onion pretzel pieces...substitute whatever tickles your taste buds. I'm really reaching this morning.

I love those too. Enjoy

Oh joy! I love the taste so much I cannot have them in the house.
Maybe I'll get some today? Just a small bag? Yum!

Yes, some great answers come from "reaching!"


WC

Everything.

Sh_t gets better, even when the future may seem bleak.

Lots to live for. Friends, family, co-workers...even random people on the internet care about you and your wellbeing. Everyone wants to see you happy! Yay!

So even if you don't want to "try" anymore, remember that people DO care about you. You are loved by everyone and you deserve it

My cats purring.
Waking up after weeks/months of depression and feeling like things may actually be okay.
That feeling after something great happens where you just can't stop grinning and your cheeks hurt from smiling so much.
Driving through local roads when every single traffic light happens to turn Green just as you approach it. As if it was waiting for you.
Having ice cream for dinner just because you can.
Getting a card or package in the mail.
Sunshine and spring weather after a too long winter.
Cocktail hour foods- everything tastes better when it is miniature and on a toothpick!

I subscribed to this thread because I've been plagued with not wanting to continue living for a couple months not, not constantly feeling that way but enough to really worry my therapist and psychiatrist. It's fun seeing all your different answers.

I wanted to post something for those who are in a similar situation to me.

People keep telling me reasons to keep living like the ones people have posted in this thread: living for the happiness of people I love, living for hobbies I enjoy, living because I'm so blessed, living to not hurt other people like so my son won't be traumatized by losing a parent, living because I have a lot to offer the world (their words).

None of those feel motivating for me. I just don't care.

I told my therapist that for me right now that list is B.S.
Him: I have two other people also saying that those reasons aren’t enough. What about this? Nope. How about this? Not enough.
Me: yeah! Exactly [how I feel]! What do you do?
Him: well then we have to start on a whole different level.
Me: what level?
Him: we have to start with meds, get them to where they can be invested enough to want to care.

I'm trying a new med right now.

I made a list of things that bring me joy no matter where I am chemically: going up in weights at the gym, reading a good book, rain and thunderstorms, Star Trek, my hair and eyes, and others. To me they don't justify the enormity of living, but I'm trying to do them more.

What a great thread, I have been so down about my husbands recent death, and I needs something positive in my thoughts today so thank you! I keep going for my little dog Eddie, my two girls and the memory of my husband, who was a great guy! For the kayaking adventures to come and the beautiful weather we have on tap here and my future vacation I am going to take by myself, I want to live life to its fullest through all the struggles and to learn what God has in store for me! {{{Hugs to all}}} Lela

I've never told myself that it would magically get better. I had more realistic expectations - that sometime somewhere along the line things would be okay - that within the year there would come a period of time, no matter how temporary. And that's was something that I could always depend on, and it's what actually got me through. I geuss it was this waiting game that I was really good at playing during my depressions.

I don't have to wait long anymore, on meds.

I want to try I really do, but this bipolar sh_t is getting so tired already. I wish it would just kill me already instead of just messing with my moods.

I am desperate, trying to find a reason to hold on.

Then I think of my family, my wonderful best friend and my therapist I will leave behind knowing he failed me. I don't want to go on, but I push. I push so damn hard. This is the worst day I have had in a very long time and I don't know why it happened, it just did.

Please, please Dear God, let me survive.

I keep on "keeping on." Never forget that things WILL change. We cycle. It isn't permanent and there's support here along the way.